A sketch selling crutches

Gao Xiumin: Ah ~ ~ ~ What a fool! Big fool! Zhao Benshan: What are you yelling about? Don't call me a stage name in front of everyone, okay? Gao Xiumin: Father, Zhao Benshan: Well, Gao Xiumin: If you ask me, don't sell this crutch! Zhao Benshan: You are talking nonsense. If you don't sell it, this transfer will cost labor and materials. You haven't slept for a day and a night. If you don't sell it, you're not blind. Gao Xiumin: The streets are full of good legs and feet. Who will buy your things? Zhao Benshan: You don't know what my name is. I can fool right and wrong, fool the adulterer, and let the young couple live a good life. I'll lie to him and say goodbye. Today I am a kidnapper, and I can trick him into limping with a pair of good legs! Gao Xiumin: Haha, you can forget it, Zhao Benshan: Believe it or not? Gao Xiumin: I don't believe you can fool a man with good legs? Zhao Benshan: That's my strong point. Gao Xiumin: I don't know what your strengths are yet. (To the audience) Congratulations, I heard that some people buy horses to sell motorcycle covers, some people buy motorcycles to sell helmets, some people suffer from insomnia and some people sell sleeping pills, and some people-Zhao Benshan: Stop it, this is called the market, so pay special attention to the quantity in advance! Gao Xiumin: Sometimes you make mistakes in advance! Zhao Benshan: This turn was a mistake. Gao Xiumin: I heard that driving a four-wheeled vehicle with a lock post hurt my leg. I got up early in the dark to make this turn. As a result, I was hit hard and took a wheelchair directly after discharge. This turn is not sold, hahaha ~ ~ hehehe ~ ~ Oh ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: Don't worry, I'll kidnap this couple today. Gao Xiumin: Then the streets are full of legs and feet. Who sells them? Zhao Benshan: Honey, let's find a good one and sell it to him today to see my bluff. Gao Xiumin: Then why don't you lie? Zhao Benshan: Where there is a will, there is a way, understand? Give me a shout: Gao Xiumin: I won't fool you, do it yourself ~ Zhao Benshan: See if I wink? Hey, someone is coming, shouting ~~ ~ Gao Xiumin: Ah, turn, turn, turn! Turn, turn! Turn around! Fan Wei: I said, what are you bossing around for? You knew where I was going, so you made me turn. Zhao Benshan: Shout for sale. Gao Xiumin: Oh! Sell, Zhao Benshan: Sell what? Gao Xiumin: Turn to Zhao Benshan: Connect. Gao Xiumin: Kidnapped! Kidnapped! Fan Wei: Huh? What's going on here? Who wants to kidnap you? Gao Xiumin: No, he kidnapped Fan Wei: Are you kidnapping? Zhao Benshan: What's your expression? Kidnapping, kidnapping. I can kidnap this. Do you buy it? Fan Wei: What's wrong with you? This is, Zhao Benshan: What's the matter, mind your own business ~ ~ Gao Xiumin: We are lovers, and we are playing here! Zhao Benshan: Hehehe, nothing to play! Fan Wei: This couple, on New Year's Day, sold their wives for fun ~ ~ ~ Oh ~ ~ Gao Xiumin: No ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: It's serious to stop ~ ~. Gao Xiumin: What? Zhao Benshan: It's too serious. Fan Wei: What are you talking about? Zhao Benshan: Hehe, it's none of your business ~ ~ Gao Xiumin: What is it, is it serious? Zhao Benshan: I should tell him not to tell him about the disease. It's dangerous ~ ~ ~ It's okay. I can see that there is something wrong here. My wife won't let me talk, and you can't believe it. Go ahead, it's okay ~ ~ Hehe ~ ~ It's okay ~ ~ Go ahead ~ ~ Fan Wei: You are really ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: Fan Wei: What's the matter with you? Say something nice during the Chinese New Year! What's going on Zhao Benshan: Take it easy. See that something is wrong. Alas, you don't believe it either ~ ~ Fan Wei: You have to say whether I believe it or not. What happened? Zhao Benshan: Regardless of your illness, I know what you do! Fan Wei: Ahem, I know what I'm doing. What should I do? Zhao Benshan: You are the big boss in business-Fan Wei: What? Zhao Benshan: That's impossible. Fan Wei: Nonsense. Did Big Boss pull through safely? Zhao Benshan: Working in a hotel. Gao Xiumin: How did you know he was in the hotel? Zhao Benshan: I smell chopped green onion ~ ~ ~ Is it from the hotel? Fan Wei: So ~ ~ ~ What do you think I'm doing in a restaurant? Zhao Benshan: master chef! Fan Wei: Huh? Zhao Benshan: Really? Gao Xiumin: Gee, how do you know he is a chef? Zhao Benshan: Big head, thick neck, either rich or a cook! -Isn't it? Is it a chef? Fan Wei: Wow, OK, OK ~ ~ You guessed it, Zhao Benshan: Not really, right? Fan Wei: Ah, ah, yes, yes. So what did you just say about me, saying it was serious and late? What is that? Zhao Benshan: Can you believe it? Fan Wei: I, I, I ~ ~ I believe, Zhao Benshan: I haven't felt a part of you recently, which is different from before. You think, you think hard ~ ~ ~, really, Fan Wei: I don't think, I just think my face is getting bigger and bigger? Zhao Benshan: By the way, this is not the main symptom! Do you know why your face is big? Fan Wei: Why? Zhao Benshan: It's the necrosis of your peripheral nerve that makes it bigger. Fan Wei: Where are you holding back? Zhao Benshan: Below the waist ~ ~ Feet up ~ ~ Fan Wei: Legs? Zhao Benshan: Yes! Fan Wei: No, there is nothing wrong with my leg! Zhao Benshan: Take two steps! Take two steps! Take two steps without illness! Let's go Fan Wei: OK ~ ~ Take two steps, two steps, two steps ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: Stop! What's wrong with your shoes? Fan Wei: Is there a problem? Zhao Benshan: One high and one low? Fan Wei: This is it ~ ~ ~ This is the heel of sports shoes! Zhao Benshan: Yes, your leg is sick and one leg is short! Fan Wei: That's not true! If I want a long leg and a short leg, the pants seller will tell me! Zhao Benshan: Did the pants seller tell you that you still sell pants? Who is so kind as me? Guess what? I'll adjust it for you. Believe it or not, raise your legs as high as my hands, as high as possible, and throw them hard, okay? Believe it or not? Leg designated sick, right leg short! Come on, get up! (Fan Wei coordinates) Zhao Benshan: Stop! Are you numb? Fan Wei: numb Gao Xiumin: Hey, why is he numb? Zhao Benshan: Stamping will numb you! Zhao Benshan: Are you numb? Are you numb? Fan Wei: Numb ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: Get up, get up! Leave it alone, the leg is 100% sick, leave it alone and relax! Let's go Go, go, go. Forget it, forget it. Would you like to go with me? Go up, it will be fine little by little. Go ~ ~ (Fan Wei cooperates) Fan Wei: Oh, my God! Zhao Benshan: You go! Gao Xiumin: My good leg is lame! Fan Wei: What do you mean? Zhao Benshan: Did you see that? My wife saw it. She said you were suddenly lame. Fan Wei: Sister, why didn't you find out earlier? Gao Xiumin: If you hadn't met him, you would have been lame ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: I would have transferred you ~ ~ Fan Wei: Brother, what's the matter? This? Zhao Benshan: Don't worry, you sprained your leg when you were young. Fan Wei: No, I sprained my leg. Zhao Benshan: It's moving! I don't know. Later, your career was very bad for you. So you are not a spoon, but a pier cutter. You always press this leg hard, and the heavier you press, the lighter you tiptoe, the heavier the femoral head is, and the later you are a vegetable! Gao Xiumin: Ha ha ha ha ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: What the hell? Gao Xiumin: I said ~ ~ When I first saw him, my eyes would still ~ ~. Ha ha ha ha Zhao Benshan: Be honest! I'm adjusting my condition! Fan Wei: Brother, what medicine should I take? Zhao Benshan: Drugs don't work! Gao Xiumin: Don't let people take medicine during the Spring Festival. Come on! Zhao Benshan: Look, my wife knows crutches! Fan Wei: On crutches? Zhao Benshan: Please sit down ~ ~ ~ After you are on crutches, your legs will gradually balance and get better little by little. At the beginning, an old man saw my leg was sick and worried about money, so he wouldn't let me see a doctor. Finally, she was disabled ~ ~ ~ Fan Wei: What about you? Zhao Benshan: There is a steel plate in it. You can't turn it back ~ ~ ~ Fan Wei: Is this a useless leg? Gao Xiumin: Nice leg, old man ~ ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: What are you talking about! Good ~ ~ good legs. Who is on crutches? Fan Wei: Yes. Gao Xiumin: That turn isn't-Zhao Benshan: Don't be fooled! Fan Wei: Oh, sister, will you stop fooling around? This is a patient-to-patient discussion about the disease. What do you always use to match it? This is ~ ~ I'll see what's wrong with this leg ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: Your leg is not needed ~ ~ I'll walk for you. I didn't leave before ~ ~ After this time, I ~ ~ (Zhao Benshan left) Fan Wei: Oh, oh, my God, oh, my God. Gao Xiumin: Don't be blind. Didn't you get kicked out when you dumped your shoes? Zhao Benshan: Can the leg be removed? How much are your shoes? Fan Wei: So ~ ~ 220 ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: 220? Just a pair of money. Fan Wei: Where can I buy crutches? Zhao Benshan: Transfer to Gao Xiumin: Is that right? I'll sell you this crutch ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: What are you talking about? Get over there! What are you selling? What do I sell? Why are you like this? Wouldn't it be over if a woman picked it for him? Fan Wei: No ~ ~ Gao Xiumin: No! Zhao Benshan: Will you stop it? Turn! Fan Wei: Ah, big brother! Oh, brother, I can't ask for it for nothing. I have to pay ~ ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: I know your character. If her woman wants money, you can't get rid of it. You're ashamed. When you tell you that I don't want it, you look down on you, don't you? I still have to, give half, a hundred. Fan Wei: Hey, ok ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: I told you to give me more urgency! Fan Wei: OK, OK, OK, Zhao Benshan: Stop it ~ ~ (Fan Wei pays) Fan Wei: Oh, big brother, what ~ ~ My two pockets are only 32 yuan ~ ~ Gao Xiumin: Then take it, how much do you want Zhao Benshan: What kind of bike do you want? What kind of bike do you want? Fan Wei: Oh, yes, yes ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: Why are you doing this? Gao Xiumin: I didn't say I wanted a bike? You want a bike ~ ~ Zhao Benshan: I smiled. I can't control this wife. I want a bike when I meet someone. Gao Xiumin: I didn't say I wanted a bike! Zhao Benshan: I won't take you out in the future ~ ~ ~ Fan Wei: Brother, don't be angry all the time. I think what my sister said is reasonable. You said that if you had my legs and feet, you would basically say goodbye to your bike, right? I'll just give you my bike ~ ~ ~ OK? Zhao Benshan: OK ~ ~ Gao Xiumin: No ~ ~ You can't have someone else's bike. Take it back and push it back ~ ~ ~ You don't know he's lying to you! Fan Wei: You are lying to me! How could you? I wonder why there is such a big gap between two couples living together. Zhao Benshan: Brother, turn around! Fan Wei: Brother, this is fate! Zhao Benshan: Don't get excited ~ ~ Go back and get well, and you'll be fine in a few days ~ ~ Fan Wei: OK ~ ~ Big Brother. Zhao Benshan: Relax. Fan Wei: Well, I won't say anything. Gao Xiumin: Are you going a little too far? Zhao Benshan: How can he thank us? Fan Wei: Thank you! Zhao Benshan: Look! (Fan Wei walks away on crutches) Zhao Benshan: What are you looking at? Why are you so distressed? Go, change places! Gao Xiumin: What are you going to do? Zhao Benshan: Find someone with bad legs and feet and sell him a bike! (Zhao Benshan pushes his bike to Gao Xiumin)