Face opening is a ceremony to remove facial hair and cut forehead hair and sideburns. One of the signs of marriage for women in ancient China. Also known as twisted noodles and twisted faces. The facial opening can be done at the bride's family before getting into the sedan chair, or it can be done after marrying into the groom's family. The person with an open face must be a woman with parents and children. Use new tweezers, five-color silk thread or coins. After opening the face, the person who opened the face should be rewarded with a seal.
The routine operation procedure is as follows: first apply powder on the face, especially on the edges of the hair. Then use a red double thread to transform it into a "small mechanism" with three heads. Pull one head with each hand, and the thread is stretched straight between the two hands. The other head has to be bitten and pulled apart with the mouth to form a "cross" shape. At this time, just move your hands up and down, and the red double lines will separate and close. When the thread touches a person's face, the hair can be twisted out. Most of these tasks are done by aunts and sisters-in-law, and some also ask grandmothers to do it.
Before the bride opens her face, the groom must first pick out three handfuls of hair on the bride’s face. This move sounds scary. How can the bride bear to pluck out three hairs of her hair? ! It's just a statement, it's just a three-time explanation, it's symbolic. What is the symbolic meaning here? Anyone who knows the local customs knows that if the groom is willing to take action, it means that everything will go as planned during the wedding night, and that he will open the bride's new life. Of course, the groom will not do anything lightly, and the bride will not let you do it casually. If you want to do it, you must use a shelled cooked duck egg and smear it on the bride's face first. Here, there is actually hidden what the bride wants to say and the groom’s approval. The bride asked the groom to do this to show that she was as perfect as a duck egg, and it was the groom who made her no longer a beautiful girl. However, when the bride was busy proving herself, she forgot one thing: check whether the groom was in good manners before the wedding. I'm afraid there was no ready-made method at that time. This seems unfair to the bride. I wonder if the current brides care about this or if there are any new methods. If you haven't explored it, you won't know.
The local customs are different, and the engagement process is also different. The following is for your reference;
Notes on engagement customs
Engagement is also called "engagement" "Wedding" was formerly known as "Naji" and "Nazheng". Although engagement is not as complicated as marriage, traditional customs still attach great importance to it. Both men and women need to prepare a number of gifts. The process is as follows:
The groom and the husband are going on the road to get married!
The groom first performs family sacrifices at home, and then takes a car with the matchmaker to the bride's house to marry. After getting off the car and entering the door, you can't escape the red envelope!
(1) Tribute Officer: Commonly known as "Mr. Box", he is responsible for giving gifts and hiring. The tribute officer must control the number of people (an even number), the vehicles (six or twelve), the bride price (an even number and properly wrapped in red paper), and six gifts.
(2) Family Sacrifice: Before setting off to the woman’s home to accept the gift, the man first performs an ancestor worship ceremony at home. At this time, the “box cake” or large cake used for the gift will be offered as an incense offering. The ancestors of the Song Dynasty are about to go to the bride's house somewhere to hire a bride, and ask the ancestors to bless this marriage to be happy and happy.
(3) Departure: After the family sacrifices, the tribute officer is responsible for carrying all the betrothal gifts into the car, and the groom and the matchmaker ride together to go to the bride's home.
(4) Red envelopes: In addition to taking care of the number of people, cars, and betrothal gifts before departure, the Gongli Palace must also remind the groom to prepare more red envelopes. For example: the uncle who comes to open the groom's car door, the "pressing table", and the six accompanying relatives all need to prepare the bride's meeting gifts, the bride's new friends holding face wash, and the matchmaker's gifts.
How to apply for a job after signing a lifelong contract?
You have always heard "Eat rice fragrantly and marry a good son-in-law"! Therefore, rice cakes must be included in the six rites.
In addition, why are four-color candies prepared? It symbolizes the sweetness of the newlyweds and their longevity.
The betrothal gift not only represents the man's repayment to the woman's parents and thanks the woman's family for their hard work in raising the soon-to-be bride, but it also represents the man's face. Therefore, most people are willing to buy something that will make them look good and decent, and each betrothal gift also contains the symbolic meaning of seeking good luck and increasing perfection.
The betrothal gift is usually divided into a simple six-piece gift or a more elaborate twelve-piece gift. The amount of the betrothal gift should be arranged according to the individual's budget. At the same time, you might as well ask a matchmaker to consult the girl's parents and ask for her opinions to create the best of both worlds. .
The marriage between a man and a woman has officially begun
Thunder! The sound of firecrackers sounds, and the man to marry has arrived! On that day, ancestor worship and tea are held, and the ceremony is not completed until the ring is worn that will hold the hand until the end of the head.
After the big gift, how does the woman return the gift?
Chinese people have always paid attention to "reciprocity of courtesy". After the man has given you a big gift, the woman will naturally prepare a gift in return, but you can't let the man go away empty-handed.
Han Nationality - Marriage Customs
In the past, the marriages of Han young people were mostly arranged by their parents. Most of them were engaged by their parents since childhood, and some even married on the fingertips, that is, before the children were born. At birth, both parents establish a marriage relationship for them.
No marriage between men and women with the same surname: that is, men and women with the same surname should not marry each other. This rule started in the early Western Zhou Dynasty and was a legacy left over from when the Zhou people practiced exogamy. In the Spring and Autumn Period, people had further understanding that marriage with the same surname would cause deformities and infertility in the offspring, but marriages with the same surname still occurred from time to time among the nobles. After the Warring States Period, family names were used as surnames. After the Han Dynasty, surnames were not distinguished, so it was common for people with the same surname not to marry. By the Tang Dynasty, marriages with the same surname were prohibited according to the ancient system.
The Song and Yuan Dynasties had the same Tang law. People with the same surname were married and divorced. During the Ming and Qing Dynasties, the area was larger and the population was large. It had already become a region-based society, replacing the original clan based on blood. Therefore, "Ming Code" and "Qing Code" both have the same surname and the same clan. The two laws stipulate that intermarriage is prohibited on the surface, but in fact, marriage can be done if the same surname but different clans are different. In the late Qing Dynasty, the laws were compiled to combine the non-marriage between people with the same surname and the non-marriage between relatives, and only prohibited marriage within the same clan.
Before getting engaged, a matchmaker should be invited to the bride’s house to propose marriage. When getting engaged, the man gives the woman some property as a "betrothal gift". When getting married, the woman also brings a lot of property to the man's family, which is called a "dowry".
On the day of the wedding, the groom will get in a ceremonial car or sedan chair and go to the bride's home to "welcome" her bride. There will be a band in front of the ceremonial car or sedan chair. After the bride is welcomed into the groom's home, she must pay homage to heaven, earth and her parents. After the ceremony, the newlyweds enter the bridal chamber. At this time, the groom's family held a banquet to entertain relatives and friends who came to congratulate him. In some places, there is a habit of making noise in the wedding room and listening to the comments.
Check the date: Han marriage customs. Also known as reporting the date. Popular in most counties and townships in Guangxi. A step in rural marriage negotiation and engagement. After the young man and woman get to know each other, they inform their parents and ask a matchmaker to communicate. The man gives the woman a gift and then decides on a wedding date.
In the old days, people often asked a fortune teller to arrange the "eight characters", and then proceed only if the fortunes match. In some places, both parents meet to betroth their children. For example, in Quanzhou County, after both parties reach an agreement, the matchmaker will send wine, meat, clothing and materials to the woman on behalf of the man, and will accompany the woman's parents and uncle to the man's house on an agreed date, and the man will host a banquet. The young man holds a pot and pours wine, first to the woman's uncle and then to his own uncle, and then to the guest and then the host. The two parties agreed on a wedding date and the engagement was successful. Afterwards, the man and woman give the woman heavy gifts and betrothal money, the woman prepares the dowry, the man prepares furniture, and the wedding is held as scheduled. If the woman is urging the marriage, she will make a pair of glutinous rice cakes (commonly known as "reunion cakes") and send them to the man's house. The man understands this and treats her warmly and invites his neighbors to accompany him. Generally, the woman's suggestion to advance the wedding date is respected.
He Langge: Han marriage custom, popular in Xing'an County in northeastern Guangxi. After the worship service and dinner, relatives and friends gathered around the groom in the main hall and sang congratulatory songs. Improvised congratulatory messages, including joking and humorous remarks. Relatives and friends sing a song, and the groom drinks a glass of wine. Singing until midnight, the bridegroom is sent into the bridal chamber. The female singer waits behind closed doors, while the man and woman sing "Opening the Door Song" due to each other, and then open the door after enjoying themselves. After entering the house, sing and make noise in the room, from "Congratulations to the groom on one glass of wine" to "Ten glasses of wine", and the groom drinks from 1 to 10 glasses in turn (if you are not strong enough to drink, the male singer can drink on his behalf). Then "Mating Wine" is sung, and the newlyweds drink together. Finally, the singer knocked on the door and sang "Knocking on the Door Song" to end the wedding.
Sitting in the Red Hall: A Han marriage custom popular in Quanzhou County in northeastern Guangxi. On the eve of their marriage, young men and women worship their ancestors in their own homes and receive admonitions from their elders. The bride wears a red pendant and is accompanied by her classmates. She sits in the hall and sings the "Crying Wedding Song" in a soft and euphemistic voice, remembering her parents and recounting the love between sisters. The sisters told the bride to be filial to the elderly and to be harmonious to her brothers and sisters after she passed away, and praised the groom for his handsomeness and hard work. When the bride expressed her dissatisfaction, the sisters tried to comfort her. Singing late into the night, Yi Yiyi bid farewell and gave gifts. The groom was also accompanied by his brothers in the same class and sat in the main hall of his home, receiving the lessons from his elders about being diligent, thrifty, managing the family, and how to behave in the world. After the teaching, the old man retired, the young men joked and chased the groom, and the joy ended late at night.
Key-asking: Han marriage custom is popular in Quanzhou County in northeastern Guangxi. The bride's wedding key is held by the "bridal groom" appointed by her younger siblings or nephews. Before the ceremony, the groom sends a package to the groom to ask for the key so that he can open the box after the ceremony and display the rice, money and goods inside, symbolizing a bumper harvest and a wealthy family after the marriage. There were too few bridegrooms to accept the bridegroom, and the groom added many times. The groom accepts the package, and after the groom obtains the key, he happily pays homage to the bride.
House viewing: one of the Han marriage customs and an important procedure in rural marriage negotiations. Also known as housekeeping and housekeeping. Popular in most counties and townships in Guangxi. At that time, the woman and two girls called "accompanying aunts", accompanied by more than 10 relatives and friends, will visit the men and women to check on their families (sometimes the woman herself will not go). The man hosted a banquet for the guests. The matchmaker introduces the parties to the marriage proposal. When the woman's relatives and friends ask for financial gifts on her behalf, the man usually agrees and gives "travel money" to the guests. The next day, both parties discussed the matter in detail through a matchmaker. In some places, it is even allowed to enter the inner chamber of the man who is planning to marry, rummage through the cabinets, and check the true situation, and then discuss the marriage through a matchmaker.
Black house robbery: Han marriage custom, popular in He County, Guidong. In Xiacheng Mountain District, after the bride cried for two days and two nights, she hid in a dark room with her female companions early in the morning on the wedding day. After the men's and women's wedding teams arrive, the bride's brother (or cousin) and the powerful young man break in through the door. The female companion threw sand and waved bamboo branches to resist. The snatcher tried to drag the female companions out of the door to eliminate interference. If the two snatchers are defeated, the number of people will increase to 4 or even 10, until the bride is forced to go out. Then the two (or four) women in the groom's wedding team take turns carrying the bride to the groom's house. During the competition for bride-grabs, men wiped pots and smoke on women while women tore off men's clothes, turning the ancient tradition of bride-grabs into a slapstick game between young men and women.
Poetry sayings: Han marriage customs, popular in most counties and villages in Guangxi. An important procedure in the wedding. The groom's uncle often lights a pair of wedding candles on the altar table and says congratulations and blessings. For example, colorful sayings are commonly used in He County, Guidong: "The dragon shines alone, shining high in the palace, the husband and wife live together, and they are blessed with fortune and wealth." After the congratulatory speech, the bride and groom worshiped heaven, earth, ancestors, and got married.
Huimen: Old Han marriage customs.
That is, on the third, sixth, seventh, ninth or tenth day after the marriage or on the full moon, the son-in-law will bring gifts and return to his natal home with the bride to pay homage to the wife's parents and relatives. The ceremony of becoming a son-in-law is now complete. This custom originated in ancient times and is generally called "Guining", which means returning home to visit parents after marriage. In later generations, the names varied from place to place. In the Song Dynasty, it was called "Baimen"; in the Qing Dynasty, it was called "Shuanghuimen" in the north; "Huiqin" in the south; in some areas of Hebei, it was called "Huo Guye"; in Hangzhou, it was called "Hui Lang". In modern times, Tongbao is also known as the "Returning Gate of Three Dynasties" on the third day after marriage. This is the last ceremony of the marriage. It means that the daughter will not forget the gift of upbringing from her parents, and the son-in-law will thank his parents-in-law and the newlyweds for their love and beauty. Generally, the bride's family will hold a banquet to entertain the new son-in-law. . The newlyweds may return on the same day or stay for a few days. If they stay, they may not stay in the same room.
Ancient Han marriage customs
Three things to do:
Applying for and seeking marriage: After a man reaches a certain age, his parents will arrange for him to find a good match. First find a matchmaker. After finding a matchmaker, introduce your family situation, your desired goals, give the matchmaker gifts, and show your betrothal wealth and other things. The matchmaker then goes to the corresponding home and introduces him to the groom's family. If the woman's parents agree, the man can go to the woman's house or the woman can go to the man's house for a blind date (in ancient times, men and women could not go in person and had to be done by their parents). The parents of both parties will talk about the situation of the family and the conditions of the man and woman. If both parties agree, it will be done. Give each other engagement tokens such as jade matches, etc. Or if the woman agrees, the woman will give the man a cup of tea. If the man thinks it is okay, he will put "tea money" on the table after drinking tea (the amount is not limited, but it must be an even number) ) had tea. Even if you agree to the marriage
Betrothal:
Ask for names; if the man and woman are in the same horoscope and there is no conflict, the two parties will give each other Geng post with their names, birthdays and birthdays written on it. The horoscope, age, etc. are used as proof of engagement.
Najib: After the engagement, the man selects an auspicious day to celebrate the ceremony, and the formal ceremony will be held a few days later
The ceremony: fifteen to twenty days before the wedding, on the auspicious day , the man sends betrothal gifts, betrothal hairpins, and marriage certificates to the woman's house to propose marriage
(bed setting): A few days before the wedding, the lucky woman will move the wedding bed to a suitable location. Then, before the wedding, the lucky woman is responsible for making the bed, placing mattresses, sheets, dragon and phoenix quilts, etc. on the bed, and placing various happy fruits, such as red dates, longans, dried lychees, red mung beans and red beans. After the bed is installed, no one is allowed to enter the new room or touch the new bed until the couple enters the room on the wedding night.
(Dowry): The woman must prepare a dowry to bring with her on the wedding day. Dowry is a symbol of the woman's family's status and wealth. The dowry includes bronze mirrors, various ornaments, money and treasures, etc.
(Before marriage): The man worships his ancestors - before going out to marry the bride, he must first worship his ancestors, report that the marriage has been decided, and pray for blessings. Before the woman goes to bed, her mother will wash and dress her up and cover her with a red hijab
Wedding ceremony:
Welcoming the bride: Ancient weddings were held in the evening. Welcoming the bride is the highlight of the entire wedding. The bride is brought out by her sister or bridesmaid and handed to her father, who then hands it to the groom. Before leaving the bride's home, the bride and groom bowed to their parents and parents-in-law respectively to say goodbye. Big sedan chair. After six people, eight people and twelve people carry the bride to the groom's house, the bridegroom's family members will open the door of the sedan in person and invite the bride out. Then a lucky elder (mostly a woman) from the groom's family will tie the red knot into a concentric knot. The rope is given to the bride and groom. They hold the red rope and walk into the auditorium. Do not step on the threshold: the threshold represents the facade, and the bride must step over it. And the girl holds a bronze mirror and shines it on the bride and groom to wish for happiness and perfection
Chapel: the formal part of the wedding. In front of the hall, the ceremonial guest presides over the bride and groom standing to worship heaven and earth, their parents; the husband and wife bow to each other, have fun, and the ceremony is completed
After the ceremony: On the morning of the next day, the bride and groom meet their parents-in-law together, and the groom also has to leave his family home All the relatives are introduced to the bride, and then the bride and groom serve tea to the elders. On the third day, the bride and the groom go together to worship their ancestors. The bride officially becomes the family, and the wedding officially ends.
After the wedding, the groom also prepares money to thank the matchmaker, which is called a matchmaker gift. He can also make a show of thanks to the matchmaker.
In ancient times, weddings were called "Xiao Dengke", so the wedding attire of men and women should be festive and solemn. Most of the men dress in a bright red dress. They usually dress solemnly and formally. They usually wear a red silk scarf or a big red flower. The bride wears a red auspicious dress, embroiders the auspicious phoenix pattern, puts her hair up, which is commonly known as "top head", puts on makeup and wears a phoenix crown. .
The concubine system in ancient China is a wonder of the world. This system began to sprout from the day the matrilineal clan disappeared, and then grew vigorously and became unstoppable.
From a modern perspective, the Chinese-style "concubine system" is an extremely inhumane, extremely cruel and ruthless system. Because it brings "class" into the family, brings people who share the same bed and pillows, brings it into the relationship between brothers and sisters, and forcibly divides a family connected by blood into two categories: the oppressed and the oppressed. This is really a huge mockery of human nature. In terms of institutional meaning alone, the concubine system is inferior to the "four wives system" in Arab countries. I have to say that this is the black humor behind the way of "kindness and forgiveness".
In fact, the ancient Chinese raised objections to the concubine system very early on. "The Book of Changes" says: "Two women living together, but their ambitions do not match each other, are called Gege.
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However, foresight and equality of humanity are no better than hedonism and dictatorship. The concubine system still exists and a complete set of rules has been developed.
Many people now It is said that ancient China was a system of polygamy. This is wrong. If you were really born in ancient times and said this, you would be regarded as an unruly person. In ancient China, monogamy was still a system. Concubines cannot be counted as legal spouses. If it must be said, it can only be a "monogamous concubine system".
During the clan society period, there was a "concubine system" in the country. It is a marriage system that only clan leaders are qualified to implement. That is, when a daughter gets married, the sister or female slave of the same surname must be married as a concubine, and the status of the sister concubine is higher than that of the female slave. There is no need to say more.
After that, the "concubine" officially appeared. Although the concubine has the responsibility of raising children, why can't she enjoy the treatment of a "wife". The original reason is very simple - the family background of the wife is higher than that of the concubine, and the concubine is usually a gift from the defeated party. "Marry", and concubine means "acceptance". The property sent to the in-law's family when marrying a wife is called "bride price", and the property given when taking a concubine is called "concubine purchase capital".
< p> "Gu Liang Zhuan": "Don't be a concubine but a wife." That is to say, a concubine is not qualified to be a wife. A man who has a concubine but no wife is still an unmarried "diamond king" and his wife is dead. Even if the husband has a house full of concubines, he is still a widower without a wife.The status of concubines has become a foregone conclusion. In the Tang and Song Dynasties, it became an iron rule. "Tang Lv Shu Yi" clearly stipulates: "Concubine is a lowly person", "Concubine is open to business", "Concubine and guest daughter are taken as wives for one and a half years." ”
If a concubine is promoted to a wife, it violates the criminal law. Once the incident occurs, the couple will have to serve one and a half years in prison together, and they will still be divorced. Under such laws, as a concubine, The concubine's woman is no longer a human being, and it has become commonplace for the husband or his wife to abuse the concubine.
"Huiyuan": "Concubine, you can meet a gentleman but you can't get married." "It turns out that concubines are only used for handover between men and women. They can only be intimate with their husbands, but they are not qualified to be called husband and wife.
"Book of Rites": "Those who buy concubines together are treated as common property because of their lowliness. "Same as having sex with her husband and giving birth to children for her husband, but her status as a concubine is just a purchased item.
In addition, ancient China was still an absolute class society and a patriarchal society. , the marriage of children must be decided by parents. Perhaps in order to fundamentally prevent free love between young men and women, especially among different classes, legal provisions must strictly stipulate the distinction between wives and concubines.
"Book of Rites". : "The one who runs away is a concubine, and the parents and the people of the country despise her." "The good and the bad will not marry." That is to say, if the children's free love is blocked and they meet to elope, the woman is not qualified to be a wife, and both families only consider her. Just a concubine
In the Tang Dynasty, Bai Juyi wrote a long poem "The Silver Ping at the Bottom of the Well" about this social situation of "running away as a concubine": There is a silver bottle at the bottom of the well, and the silver bottle is lust. The jade hairpin is polished on the stone, and the hairpin is folded in the middle. It seems that I am separated from you now. I remember that Chanjuan had a special look on her temples. The two moths are dancing in the background of the garden. I am not acquainted with you at this time. I am riding a white horse next to a hanging poplar and look at each other from afar. I know you instantly. Heartbroken, I heard you say that the pines and cypresses on the mountain were turning into my heart, and my two servant girls went to your house for five or six years. I can't bear to worship Pingfan. I finally know that I can't live in your home. I have no choice but to go out. I have no family in my hometown. I have been a concubine for hundreds of years. I would like to remind you that you should be careful not to give your life away to anyone else! After five or six years of residence in the Jun family, the adults of the Jun family frequently spoke. If she is hired, she will be a wife and a concubine, and she cannot bear to be worshiped by the master. "She has served her husband-in-law for five or six years, but she cannot get the approval of her husband's family. She is not qualified to participate in family sacrifices, and the son she gave birth to is not the first choice heir of her husband's family.
From this perspective The concubine system ravages not only these women who miss their lives, but also the men who love her but have no autonomy, and her sons, who are all suffering under this system. Men can only live with the concubines recognized by their parents. Wives share the same bed and have different dreams, watching eagerly as their beloved woman becomes the childbearing tool of their legitimate wife.
Another perspective: the concubine system is based on the premise that men are superior to women. Why do women become concubines when they elope? Safe and sound? What is the meaning of this? ——In addition, how much happiness can a woman become a man's wife in this situation?
In addition, in the etiquette, the number of concubines is strict.
The "Book of Rites" stipulates: "The emperor will establish six palaces, three wives, nine concubines, twenty-seven wives, and eighty-one royal wives." "Zhou Li": "There are one hundred and twenty concubines of the king: one queen, three wives, nine concubines, twenty-seven wives, and eighty-one female emperors.
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The emperor can have one hundred and twenty women headed by the queen. The queen is his legitimate wife. She has the qualification to be alone with the emperor. Other concubines cannot be alone with their husbands, and whether they can accompany their husbands must be approved. Queen's approval. - This system went a step further in the Ming and Qing palaces: after the emperor selected the concubines, he would send the list to the queen for review. If the queen agreed, the queen's seal would be stamped. If the queen refused to stamp the seal, The emperor often has no choice. If he wants to abolish his wife or change his concubine, it will often affect the emperor's reputation after his death. No one except the emperor is willing to take this risk.
The emperor is the emperor and his concubine. The number of concubines was the largest, and the number of concubines was sharply reduced according to etiquette and law: below the emperor's age, the number of concubines could only be two, and the nobles could only have one concubine, while ordinary wealthy people had to have no children until their legitimate wives were over fifty. A concubine can only be taken in when she is young. Moreover, no concubine can stay with her husband all night. She must leave after her husband falls asleep.
This rule also applies to the emperor's concubines.
However, rules are rules, and few are willing to follow them.
The concubine system is originally a way of enjoyment for men with wealth and privilege, how can they let the rules restrict their hands and feet?
In addition to "concubine", there are also "ji", "maid", "ji" and other names. After each name, there is a group of women living in pain.
"Ji Maiji", they are actually concubines, but because they have no legal status, their experiences are not as good as concubines
In the Tang Dynasty notebook novels, there is a woman named Huo Xiaoyu. Her father is the dignified King Huo, but her mother is just the prince's "favorite maid". Therefore, after her father's death, she was even deprived of her daughter's qualifications, and both mother and daughter were made official wives and concubines of King Huo. The children they gave birth to were kicked out of the palace, became prostitutes, and eventually died in depression after meeting a weak lover.
Due to the influence of laws and social concepts, most men do not treat their concubines as maids. "Take it seriously. - Contrary to modern people's concept of equality, if they show that they treat concubines as equals, they will become the object of ridicule, thinking that they are self-degenerate and have no character.
In the Tang Dynasty, Qiao Zhizhi fell in love with his concubine Yao Niang. Because of her low status, Qiao Zhizhi, an official, could not marry her, so he chose not to marry her. As a result, Yao Niang was kidnapped by Wu Yansi and took her with him. Qiao Zhizhi committed suicide by throwing himself into a well. Wu Yansi was so angry at Qiao Zhizhi that he was falsely imprisoned and his family was ruined. If the circumstances hadn't allowed him to marry Yao Niang, perhaps things wouldn't have ended up like this. ——In the eyes of people at that time, seizing a wife and seizing a concubine were two different concepts. In addition to blaming Wu Yansi, people at the time felt that it was meaningless for Qiao Zhizhi to break up his family for a concubine.
Song Dynasty. The great writer Su Shi had a heroic writing style and was a great figure in his generation. Many people know that he was deeply devoted to his wife Wang, and his song "Jiang Chengzi" made people cry. However, if you examine his attitude towards his maids and concubines, it is enough to make modern people stunned. , I have to make another comment on his affectionate image.
Su Dongpo had many concubines in his life and had endless romantic affairs. However, his attitude towards these concubines was basically ruthless and unintentional, just like the patriarchal system, and he only regarded them as personal belongings.
When Su Dongpo was demoted, he gave away all his concubines. It is said that two of them were already pregnant, and he had no time to care about them (it was already embarrassing for the bedside man to give them away, and even more so they were pregnant). In the late Northern Song Dynasty, the eunuch Liang Shicheng and Hanlin scholar Sun Jian both claimed to be the son of Su Shi, who was born to the concubine Su Dongpo gave away. Even Su Guo, the son recognized by Su Dongpo, was concerned about this. He refused to deny this situation, but became close to Liang and Sun. It is said that Liang Shicheng took care of brotherhood and even said to the accountant at home: "Whenever Xiaosu, a bachelor, spends less than 10,000 guan, there is no need to sue me, just pay it."
The concubine who gave away her fetus also returned The fortune teller is a concubine named Chun Niang who is even more miserable. Su Dongpo's friend Jiang came to see him off and accidentally saw Chun Niang. He was greatly admired and said to Su Dongpo: "I have a white horse and I am willing to exchange it with the bachelor for a beautiful concubine." Su Dongpo thought about it and exchanged the famous horse for a concubine. , It's a good deal, it's a good deal, and he immediately nodded in agreement. But when Chun Niang heard the news, the concubine, who was both talented and beautiful, refused and accused Su Dongpo: Back then, Yan Ying knew not to sin against horses, but you, a dignified scholar Su, who euphemistically called "loving fragrance and cherishing jade", wanted to punish Su Dongpo. People change horses! In anger, Chun Niang hit a locust tree and died on the spot. ——Although she is a concubine, she is also a woman. However, a woman is regarded as a horse and donkey by the man she loves. She is hated and humiliated. It is really lifeless.
Except for the tragic death of Chun Niang, the most famous of Su Dongpo’s concubines is Wang Chaoyun. She was the only concubine who was not given away by Su Dongpo and was able to accompany him in exile in Lingnan. However, although Su Dongpo was already a widower at that time, although Wang Chaoyun shared the joys and sorrows with him, and although Wang Chaoyun gave birth to children for him, she still could not become his wife. After her death, Su Dongpo was still just The word "Ji Ren" is written on her tombstone. ——Because she came from a humble background, and because taking a concubine as a wife was a taboo in society at that time. This smart woman can only live in obscurity for the rest of her life. Although she was well versed in classics and history and had a great enlightenment before her death, she was unable to change her life.
In addition, although concubines are despicable, prostitutes are even more despicable. This is also the concept of scholar-bureaucrats.
Although they sang with famous prostitutes and were romantically involved with celebrities, in their hearts, they despised them and never truly loved or cared about their life experiences. Su Dongpo once called a prostitute his "confidant", but in the end he still cherished his reputation and refused to take her as a concubine. The famous prostitute could only become a monk out of despair.
Su Dongpo’s way of treating concubines is very typical among ancient Chinese scholar-bureaucrats. He was famous for his boldness and open-mindedness, and he treated his concubines no more than that. Let me ask, how many women in the world would be willing to be a concubine?
Being a concubine is a great misfortune for a woman. They are not even qualified to express their love for their husbands.
If a man has deep feelings for his concubine, he will be laughed at and embarrassed.
"Guoyu": During the Spring and Autumn Period, the father-in-law Wenbo, a senior official in the state of Lu, passed away. His mother warned his concubine: When there are outsiders at the ceremony, you are not allowed to cry, nor are you allowed to frown, let alone You must have swollen eyes to show others! But I can’t embarrass my son by letting outsiders say that he is actually in love with Concubine Ji!
It’s okay if you don’t have any affection for the concubine. What’s more, more men regard the concubine as a tool for pleasure and can be beaten or scolded at will.
Yan Tingzhi doted on his concubine Xuanying, but his legitimate son Yan Wu was very dissatisfied and smashed her head with a hammer while Xuanying was sleeping. Did Yan Tingzhi punish his son? No! He actually admired his son for having the courage to kill someone at such a young age! Later, Yan Wu really became the Jiedushi, and Yan Ting was even more proud when he thought about it. Xuanying died like this, and she still "loved my concubine". She loved her ass.
For Yang Zheng, a famous general in the Southern Song Dynasty, killing concubines was a common practice: "There are dozens of concubines, all of whom have musical skills, but if they are not to your liking, they will be killed with a stick, skinned, and surrendered." The feet were nailed to the wall, and when they were dry, they were lifted up and thrown into the water." The staff were so frightened that they could not speak.
In the Qing Dynasty, a romantic talent named Dong Xiaowan took a concubine in Mao Bijiang, which was called a romantic affair. In fact, in the eyes of Mao Bijiang, Dong Xiaowan was nothing more than someone who could be beaten and scolded. During the war, he risked his family to flee, risked his own country to help his mother and wife, but scolded Dong Xiaowan for holding him back, which is a clear proof. When Dong Xiaowan was attending to her illness, Mao Pijiang yelled at her, hit and scolded her, saying that she was suffering from an abnormal illness. ——Since it is abnormal, why is Dong Xiaowan the one who is beaten and scolded? Have you never beaten or scolded your mother and your first wife? It's very simple. He has already decided in his heart that concubine Ji is something that can be beaten or scolded.
If a husband who is supposed to love each other treats his concubine like this, then of course his first wife should be even less polite.
There is no need to give examples in this regard. If you look through the history books, they are full of pits and valleys.
Not to mention ordinary people, even the palace, there is no need to give in too much. The biological mother of Emperor Xian of the Han Dynasty, Wang Meiren, was the granddaughter of a handsome general. She was originally a noble lady, but she married the emperor and unfortunately became a concubine, so she could only be a slave and maidservant under the empress, his legitimate wife. She gave birth to a son, Liu Xie, for her husband Emperor Ling of the Han Dynasty, which made the queen so jealous that she was killed by a glass of poison before she could even get to the delivery bed.
As a husband, Emperor Ling did not take Beauty Wang seriously. She was just a concubine, so Queen He passed the test without any danger. Although Emperor Xian later became the emperor, he never seriously avenged his mother: Queen He was his legitimate mother, and even if she died, Liu Xie could not do anything to her. Beauty Wang (actually she was just a child when she died) died silently.
The royal family of the Northern Wei Dynasty took the killing of concubines as a matter of course. According to the rules, the prince's biological mother must commit suicide. So naturally, no queen would be willing to die, and all the innocent people killed were concubines. In the Imperial Palace of the Northern Wei Dynasty, concubines not only became surrogates for the first-class wives, but also became their scapegoats.
The Ming Dynasty had a system of sacrificial burial of palace concubines. These buried women were all concubines and never had a direct descendant. During the Qing Dynasty, Nurhaci's concubine Abahai was buried as a sacrifice, which became a legend in history books.
Everyone was talking about Huang Taiji forcing the palace to kill his stepmother and complaining about Abahai - in fact, Nurhachi's two concubines were also forced to die at the same time. How many times did they see someone paying attention to their names and experiences and complaining for them? Already? Abahai, the head wife, died unjustly, should they, the concubines, die?
That’s it! No more COPY