I want you to meet Pizad's boyfriend. Bad and ugly hair style, little money, no schooling, average sexual ability, but all good looks. Ha ha laugh ..
Water is famous for picking up girls countless times, and it is a thorn in all our men. His elegant posture exudes attractive charm, which makes all girls irresistible. His heartbreaking eyes, no matter how cold and arrogant a woman is, will be melted by his gentle eyes. He is recognized as the lover of the neighborhood and the soul of the tea restaurant. Everyone knows him-Prince Egg Tower.
He is proud, but kind-hearted. He keeps a low profile, but he is admired by thousands of people. He can cook a super dish called the art of fire with the fire given by God to mankind. Is he the incarnation of the immortal? Or the Hellscream? No one knows, but what is certain is that everyone has given him a name-food ~ ~ God!
Is that really the case? ! What I said cannot be broken! Not bad! I am Tang Bohu who pays equal attention to beauty and wisdom, and I am the embodiment of hero and chivalry!
Sweeping the floor is only my superficial work. My real identity is a research monk.
Sir: I'm a left Qinglong and a right white tiger. The old cow is at the waist and the faucet is at the chest. If people don't kill people, the Buddha won't kill the Buddha!
The poor monk is the abbot of Shaolin Temple, Fa wet dream. Amitabha, I came and went with the wind. ...
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. All right! To tell you the truth, my name is Pan An, Yushu, and Zhou Botong's plum blossoms crush Haitang!
With your wisdom, can I scare you?
I'm not afraid to tell you, I've seen UFOs since BB, which is what the world calls UFOs and UFOs. You got it? When I was 4 years old, I saw the legendary Loch Ness monster again. I talked with bigfoot in the Himalayas and guessed spring. Plus, I play roller coasters every morning, pirate ships at night, pirate ships in the morning, roller coasters at night and pirate ships many times at dusk. Let me tell you something.
Sir, you have bones on your forehead, light in your eyes, immortal reincarnation, immortal descent. I finally waited for you. Don't move. Although I let the cat out of the bag and disaster is inevitable, it's my destiny takes a hand. Even if I have to take a big risk, I'll let you see the whole picture.
Ah! Thinking is really like sailing against the current, and it is worthy of being the king with ideas.
All right! He stuffed it in without thinking, and he deserves to be a swinger. I love you! ! !
Do you think I can't find you if I hide? It's no use! An excellent person like you is as bright and outstanding as a firefly in the dark, no matter where you are. Your melancholy eyes, your sparse beard, your magical knife technique and that dry martini all fascinated me deeply. However, although this is excellent, there are rules. Anyway, you have to pay for last night's accommodation. Don't you have to pay that woman?
Eliminating violence and maintaining peace are our obligations as citizens, and doing good deeds and accumulating virtue is also my own interest, so I will help the old lady cross the street once a week, and I will do it three or four times on Sundays and public holidays.
No! This is not an ordinary box, it is the god in the box, referred to as the box god!
Good is rewarded with good, and evil with evil. There is a natural cycle, and the weather is beautiful. I once caught a dragon and a phoenix by mistake. The emperor caught me today, which is really instructive. My admiration for the emperor is like a raging river and an uncontrollable Yellow River.
What about his martial arts? It's called nine days and ten places. Bodhisattva shook her head in fear and split the golden lightning palm! Within 100 miles from Fiona Fang, people, animals, shrimps, crabs and fleas all flew to Huasong!
I tell you, to deal with this kind of woman, we must use condescending eyes and strong arms to save her from the ocean of desire.
Humiliate and beg for forgiveness:
With your wisdom, it is difficult for me to explain to you!
Shit, you are a piece of shit. Life is cheaper than ants. I drive a Mercedes, you pick your nose. Eat! ? Eat shit!
The alkaline water surface has not been chilled, so it is full of alkaline water. Fish balls also have no fishy smell, but in order to hide it, you specially added curry juice to make curry fish balls. But it's naive, because you haven't cooked enough time. The taste of curry is only on the surface, not at all. Fish balls will be diluted when they are put into soup. A good curry fish balls will keep you from tasting fish and curry. Defeat Never pick carrots, too much muscle, failure! The pigskin was so badly cooked that it didn't bite the head. Defeat Pig blood will rot, disperse and fail when it is caught! The worst thing is the large intestine, which is not cleaned at all, and there is a lump of shit. Are you mistaken? Hey, shit. Hey, shit. Did you get a look at him? Hey, shit!
Ridiculous! I dare say that in front of me, no one dares to pretend, please be quiet!
Haircuts shouldn't be crazy. You should cooperate! Look at your hairstyle, it doesn't match your face, your figure, your hairstyle, it doesn't match at all! ! Brother Huan! What exactly do you want?
what did you say ? /Excuse me? You can tell such a lie? Do you have a conscience? I'm sorry about your parents, right? Is it worthy of this country? Hold a press conference to clarify, or I will skin you, tear your bones and drink your blood!
Elder sister, you are not afraid of being laughed at, or even the dog will faint.
There is nothing wrong with you. It was your parents who made you like this.
Do you want to? When is it my turn to think? !
Don't blame me for being too frank! It's insignificant that you want to take my life. ! ! !
It's really disappointing. Hearing your voice, I think you are a very emotional and imaginative person. Look at you all over, I know you have no connotation.
Boss: Dad, do you have a son? You like chicken. Big shot, you don't have your own business, and you still bother me?
Mother-in-law: You don't have to make trouble. I will expose my life. I died at the age of three, four, five, six, seven or eight, ten, eleven, and your man was hooked by me.
Bao Longxing: You have lemon head, mouse eyes, aquiline nose, eight eyebrows, protruding ears, big mouth, old Qiang teeth, wick neck, high and low shoulders, long and short hands, chicken breast, dog belly and useless waist. If I were you, I would have killed myself.
Bohu, don't be so awesome, okay? I swear, if I gamble again in the future, I will let the ugliest woman in the world stay up all night until she is torn to pieces and crumbling. Is it okay?
Two girls, have pity on me. My family of six died overnight. I am infected with 10 consumption. I'll give you half, and you can give it to me.
Fate is really unfair. Why did I lose my hair when I was so handsome? You are so ugly, but don't lose your hair.
Why do you treat me like a pig? Let me sleep as soon as you see me.
Self-describing narrative class:
You go first. I'll leave when my legs are not so shaky and my heart is not so chaotic.
More than 30 years ago, when I was in middle school, I really thought about her all the time. Sometimes I suddenly stop urinating, and then I think of her, and when I feel sweet, I forget the half-bubble urine.
The bullet entered my thigh bone, compressed my aorta and blocked my trigeminal nerve. Now the left brain is paralyzed by hypoxia and the right side is paralyzed. I have to cut the wound with a knife and take out the bullet.
I mean, this method of mine is a distracted and lovely hometown used by Hua Tuo, an ancient imperial doctor. In ancient times, Guan Yunchang concentrated on playing chess and scraping bones to cure poison. Today, I concentrated on digging bones and taking warheads, and I started-
As soon as he received the first blow, he cut his forehead to his nose. Then, right in front of his stall, his tail keel was cut several times, and two tendons were broken, which suppressed the trigeminal nerve and affected the central system of the brain, even his teeth came out.
After beheading the head of a chicken, burning yellow paper, and bleeding for the alliance, Wei Xiaobao, you are my brother in the Heaven and Earth Society, and temporarily incorporated into Aoki Hall. We have ten commandments, twenty commandments, thirty commandments and eighty commandments. If you break one of them, even if you are my apprentice, you will die by the sword.
But in this way, I am a person with complicated feelings. If a person with complicated feelings only loves you, he will become emotionally defective. Even if you have a person with emotional defects, it's no use.
Wang Cai ... Wang Cai ......
Wang Cai, you can't die. Wang Cai, you have followed me for so many years, and you are affectionate and sincere to me. But now I haven't even let you eat a full meal. Sorry, Wang Cai!
Xiao Qiang! Xiao Qiang, what's wrong with you Xiao Qiang? Xiao Qiang, you can't die! You and I have lived together for so many years, and have been teaching you to raise you as your own flesh and blood. Unexpectedly, today, white-haired people send black-haired people!
Category of short sentences:
My wife, I live near Suzhou. There is a house and a field at home, and it is endless. Who knows that Tang Bohu, he is outrageous and ruthless, colluding with officials to look down on heaven, occupying my big house and my land. My grandfather turned against him and he hit him with a stick. My grandmother called him a liar, but he caught him in the Tang family a hundred times. Finally, she hanged herself and hated the world. He also kicked my father and son out of the house and drifted to the river. In order to support my father, I had to beg alone in front of the temple. Who knows that Tang Bohu is too insidious to know this situation, so he sent someone to plot against him and beat my father and son in front. The little man survived, so pity my father! This kind of hate is harder to fill. In order to bury my father, the only way is to be a slave, earn money diligently, and read articles at the same time, vowing to gain fame and fortune, so that the enemy will be strong! Since then, Tang Yin's poems have been with me, and I remember this hatred is not shameful! ! !
On a dark and horrible night in a month, I am the Supreme Treasure, and you are Bai Jingjing. Wonderful love begins with this little fire on the bridge. As soon as I turned around, you suddenly pointed at me and my whole hand caught fire. You have to fight for me, fight for it, fight for it, fight for it, fight for it, fight for it, fight for it, fight for it, fight for it, do you see? I can describe the future development in twists and turns, because A Niu Wang Mo suddenly appeared. At that time, after you hit Niu Wangmo with the bone in your hand, you took me back to Pansi Cave. The so-called time flies, it is really good, because it just reached its climax in the blink of an eye. On the broken rock, when feelings broke out, I desperately touched you, and you desperately touched me, making a vow of never parting. Unfortunately, happiness is always short-lived, and what you get is infinite pain and sigh. Why did you die? I only used the moonlight box to turn back the clock and find out, and finally I know that you committed suicide! At the last minute, I hope to save your life! But the last time I went back in time, the moonlight box was broken, and I&; uot& ampuotjo & uot； & UOT, I went back 500 years ... that's all.
Conversation class:
A: It has been ten years. I thought this country had forgotten me.
B: No way. Even a pair of underwear and a piece of sanitary paper have their uses.
A: Really, if I lie to you, you promise that I have a son.
B: Look at you like this. You certainly don't have a son. Even if there is, it is deformed!
Who are you?
B: Jianghu is dangerous. I never leave my name easily.
Answer: since you refuse to leave your name, you have to leave a head!
I have been lonely all my life. The only person who lives alone is this head. I'm afraid it's not that easy for you to take it away!
A: OK! You forced me. I want to dye this sea with your blood.
B: I've been wandering all my life, just like being alone in it, and I've ignored life and death for a long time.
Other categories:
Sorry, I'm undercover.
You can't see me, you can't see me, you can't see me. ......
Surprised? Are you happy? Are you happy?
Sorry, director. hum ......
According to the background and personality of the character, I want to be naughty in rhythm during the later performance, but it is a bit contradictory. what do you think?
Suffer pain, according to drama theory, Stanley Slavski. It should reflect from the outside to the inside and then from the inside. Come on, you try to do it again now.
Impossible, silly sister's old * *' > * * The eldest brother's son said yes.
Talking about money hurts feelings! But the way, our brothers have no feelings for you. Let's talk about money directly.
It doesn't matter whether you have money or not, but at least be a respected person! (Change the subject)-I'd rather have money. ......
You are all women, so why kill each other? Even chickens are patriotic.
Hurry back to Mars, the earth is very dangerous.
If you want to scare me, you can't fall to the ground. I'm afraid of everything and ghosts!
Modern life is fast-paced and stressful. Thanks to Master Xing for bringing us infinite joy and unforgettable classic lines. If we can apply some of them to our daily life, will we feel more humorous and relaxed while bringing laughter to others? Friends, might as well give it a try!
When you can't sleep at night, say, "It's a long night, and you don't want to sleep."
When you praise your hometown with others, you say, "Although it is not beautiful, it has a unique flavor."
When you admire others, say, "I'm KAO! I have taken you! "
When I was disturbed by others during the break, I said, "I dare say no one dares to pretend in front of me." Please be quiet! " "
When you are walking in the street and hear a stranger greet you, you say, "Talk to me? Are you talking to me? Wrong person! "
When you can't understand what others are saying, just say, "I see, you are crazy!" " "
When others don't understand what you are saying, say, "With your wisdom, it's hard for me to explain it to you!" " "
When you seriously look down on others, you say, "shit, you are a piece of shit." Life is cheaper than ants. I drive a Mercedes, you pick your nose. Eat! ? Eat shit! "
When your girlfriend asks you why you like her, she says, "Do you need a reason to love someone?"
When a person who likes you but you don't like her asks you why, she says, "I am a person with complicated feelings. If a person with complicated feelings only loves you, he will become emotionally defective. Even if you have a person with emotional defects, it is useless. "
When people praised me for being brave, I said, "It is our duty as citizens to eliminate violence and maintain good morals. It is also my own interest to do good deeds and accumulate virtues. Therefore, I help the old lady cross the street once a week, and I also do it three or four times on Sundays and public holidays. "
When I don't like other people's hairstyles, I said, "When you cut your hair, don't just watch how others cut it." You should cooperate! Look at her hairstyle, it doesn't match her face at all, it doesn't match her face, it doesn't match her figure and hairstyle at all, it doesn't match at all! ! "
When I laughed at myself, I said, "Fate is really unfair. Why did I lose my hair when I was so handsome? Some people are so ugly but don't lose their hair. "
Seeing a child littering in the street, he said, "You are so naughty! I told you not to throw things around, it's wrong to throw things around! "
When I was drunk, I said, "Hey, give me some time. I'll get used to it when I throw up!" " "
When the interview failed, I said, "I guessed the front, but I couldn't guess the ending ..."
When the weather turned cloudy, he said, "What a big marshmallow! ! "
When it's going to rain, it says, "Look out! It thundered! It rains to collect clothes! "
When others complained about their incompetence after drinking, they comforted him and said, "How come, even a pair of underwear and a piece of sanitary paper have their uses."
When you are impatient with others' pestering, you say, "Hurry back to Mars, the earth is very dangerous."
When you are not satisfied with what others say, say, "Oh! I can sue you for slander if you talk like that, ha! "
Haha, there are too many classics. Please also give some advice.
"Isn't it strange? Are you happy? Are you happy? "
Who are you?
B: Jianghu is dangerous. I never leave my name easily.
Answer: since you refuse to leave your name, you have to leave a head!
I have been lonely all my life. The only person who lives alone is this head. I'm afraid it's not that easy for you to take it away!
How many brothers and sisters do you have? Are your parents still alive? To say a word, I just want to make one more friend before I die.
People and goblins are born of mothers, different people are born of mothers, and demons are born of mothers ... so being a demon is like being a human being. If you have a kind heart, you are no longer a demon, but a shemale.
Is the landlord okay?