Crying to get married
Tujia girls’ wedding day is ushered in with cries. The bride starts crying more than half a month before the wedding, and some may cry for more than a month, at least three to five days. Tujia people also regard whether they can sing wedding songs as a sign of a woman's intelligence and virtue. Wedding crying songs include "Crying for parents", "Crying for brother and sister-in-law", "Crying for uncle", "Crying for sisters", "Crying for matchmaker", "Crying for combing hair", "Crying for wearing flowers", "Crying for father and mother", "Crying to bid farewell to ancestors", "Crying on the sedan chair" and so on.
Crying to marry stems from women’s lack of freedom in marriage. They use the songs of crying to marry to accuse the sinful marriage system. Today, marriage is free. Tujia girls also cry when they get married, but now crying in marriage is just a ritual.
Crying Wedding Song
"Crying Wedding Song" is a custom folk song of the Tujia people. One month before getting married, girls have to sing "Wedding Crying Song" to tell the Tujia women's unfortunate fate under the feudal comprador marriage system and their attachment to their relatives. According to custom, a girl has to cry and sing for seven days to half a month, and the most is a month, until her voice is hoarse and she still keeps crying.
The process of crying singing in "Wedding Song" is divided according to the process of marriage, and is divided into three types: "One person crying and singing", "Two people crying and singing" and "Crying for reunion". "One person cries and sings" means that a girl cries and talks about her fate, her ancestors, her parents' nurturing kindness, the friendship between brothers and sisters, as well as about feudal marriages and the hateful and hateful deceptions of matchmakers. For example, "Crying Father":
There are many stars in the sky and the moon is unknown, but my father has worked so hard for me.
My father's kindness is indescribable, and it is difficult to express it in words.
Firstly, they are afraid that we will be hungry; secondly, they are afraid that we will get sick;
Thirdly, they are afraid that we will be uglier than others and wear stars and moonlight with great effort.
The fourth fear is that we are uneducated, so we will send them to school to study.
Take your daughter up and spend money to be kind and affectionate.
A woman's plate measuring one foot and five inches is only needed to be held in the mouth;
Hard times take time, and being cold and hungry takes a lot of heart!
My daughter mistakenly took the life of Nako, and it was in vain that her parents had worked so hard;
I am leaving my parents today, and my heart is full of sadness and tears!
If a girl cannot be filial to her parents, it will be difficult for her to live her whole life;
Lighting a lamp in the water is not clear, and she has come to this world in vain!
"Two people crying" is called "sisters crying", that is, the married girl cries and sings first, and the weeping person comforts and cries by the side. The clause is inserted at the end of the sentence, and the two people cry and sing together (there are also The two cried and sang) and naturally formed imitative polyphonic music. Relatives and friends in the village come to cry with them every night, and girls who are not relatives or friends also invite each other to come in groups to "Dapo" (Tujia dialect, that is, to participate in learning to cry and get married), like sisters crying to each other and singing: < /p>
Sister: "There are twelve girls on the Thoreau tree, we have the same root and we have the same girls;
Nowadays the sisters are separated, and it feels so lonely after leaving the embroidery building!
Sister: "Twelve girls on Thoreau's tree, we have the same father and mother;
Now that the sisters are leaving, it's hard to part ways and it's hard to break up!
Sister: "The Thoreau tree came to Taiwan, and my sister couldn't forgive me;
I left your sister's husband's house and only came here during the holidays!
Sister: "Sister Thoreau comes to Taiwan, I hope my sister will be so generous.
Thank you for your kindness to me, I will keep your teachings in your heart!
"Crying for reunion", also known as "accompanying ten sisters", is a unique way for Tujia girls to cry for marriage. On the night before the bride gets married, her parents invite 9 unmarried girls from their neighbors, including the bride and her daughter, to sit around a banquet in the bride's boudoir and sing all night long, so it is called the Song of Accompanying Ten Sisters. The ten sisters sit around a table. First the bride cries "ten set", then the bride cries "ten set". The chef places a dish on the table. After the dish is placed, the other nine sisters take turns crying, and finally the bride cries "ten set". "The chef put away the food and wine one after another. After the food was put away, the activity of accompanying the ten sisters came to an end. There are many lyrics in "Crying for Marriage". "Ten Pendulums" and "Ten Harvests" express the virtues of crying for ancestors, the kindness of parents, the friendship of sisters, the kindness of brothers and sisters, the love of homeland, etc. Sometimes they also criticize matchmakers. Crying with someone is often a lingering word that is hard to separate and leave. The tunes mostly use rhymes with seven verses and eight sentences, such as "My father and my mother are as kind as heaven and earth. My heart is broken with their upbringing. The trees want to be quiet but the wind does not stop. I leave without repaying my kindness. Looking at my hometown from afar, I look forward to my return date. How long will I be able to stay when I return?" The river in front of me is full of water, and my daughter’s tears are long."
The musical structure of "Crying Wedding Song" is a "couplet" structure, which is a long section repeated many times, crying repeatedly. During the singing process, due to the changes in lyrics, the melody also changes slightly, but the basic tone and ending tone of the melody remain unchanged. Each melody progresses from high pitch to descending. There are many decorative sounds in the melody, and often at the end of the sentence. Sobs and sobs were added to express the woman's grief and depression.
The music of "Crying Marriage Song" forms a solid tune, and the crying lyrics form a fixed chapter. The content is extremely rich, and the language is refined and simple. Generally, there are many five-character sentences and seven-character sentence structures. The rhymes are catchy, popular, lively, and easy to sing. Sing.
According to the wedding procedure, the cries include "crying for father", "crying for mother", "crying for brother and sister-in-law", "crying for sisters", "crying for younger brother", "crying for uncle", "crying for uncle", "crying for grandfather", "crying for grandfather", "crying for sister", "crying for brother", "crying for uncle", "crying for uncle", "crying for grandpa", "crying for grandpa", "crying for uncle", "crying for uncle" and "crying for uncle". "Matchmaker", "crying to bid farewell to ancestors", "crying to dress up", "crying to eat divorced mother's meal", "crying to wear dewy clothes", "crying to get on the sedan chair", "crying to the guests", "crying to the banquet", etc. A relatively systematic history of the blood and tears of Tujia women, and an indictment exposing the feudal comprador marriage system.
Returning Bones
The Tujia people practice monogamy. Before liberation, there was a custom of cousin marriage and house-filling marriage. Cousin marriage between aunt and uncle, also known as "returning bones", is relatively common among the Tujia people. There is a saying that "if the aunt's daughter reaches out to take it, her uncle's family will scream across the river."
Marriage in a house
Marriage in a house refers to the custom of taking in a sister-in-law after the death of an elder brother and consummating the marriage after the death of a younger brother. This is a kind of forced marriage, which was banned after the founding of the People's Republic of China.
Marriage rules of the same surname
The Tujia people are very cautious about marriages with the same surname, and only intermarriage between different clans with the same surname or those outside the Five Servers, and intermarriage within the Five Servers is considered a great rebellion. In fact, until now, even marriages with the same surname that comply with Tujia marriage regulations are still not recognized by most Tujia people.
Marriage in the history of Tujia people was relatively free. After free love, a man and a woman could become husband and wife with the consent of both parents. In Enshi Shiyao, Dashengshan and other places, there is the custom of "Daughters' Meeting", that is, every year on the 12th day of the seventh lunar month, young men and women go through the "Daughters' Meeting" to fall in love freely and form lifelong partners. After being converted to Tujiauliu, the Tujia people were forced to practice arranged marriages based on the orders of their parents and the words of the matchmaker. "Hefeng County Chronicles" written by Emperor Qianlong of the Qing Dynasty recorded: "As for the selection of a son-in-law, it is presided over by the grandparents and parents, and there is no need to ask the woman whether she wishes. For example If a woman is shameless and says she doesn't want to, she might as well be punished according to the law. Once she is engaged, she will never change it for the rest of her life. " According to the custom, the bride is carried by her relatives to the groom; after the bride is brought back to her homeland, the bride is carried by her relatives to the gate, and then she rides in a sedan or walks on foot. Whether riding in a sedan chair or walking, you must wear dewy clothes.
The Tujia people’s door-stopping ceremony when welcoming a bride is unique. When young Tujia men and women get married, both men and women hire a well-spoken person to be the general manager. The male side's general manager (also known as the Lu Supervisor) leads the wedding team to the bride's side to welcome the bride. The woman has to set up a table outside the gate, and the two managers sing or sing to each other. dialogue. If the male butler wins the song or talks about winning, move the table away and let him enter the door; if the male butler loses the song or talks, he has to crawl under the table.
After the Tujia bride and groom come to the wedding hall, they both have to rush to the cave to sit on the new bed, which is commonly known as "fighting for the bed." Their habit of sitting on the bed is usually with men on the left and women on the right, with the center line of the bed as the boundary. Scheming brides often sit on the center line of the bed to symbolize their future status in the family. Not to be outdone, the groom tried his best to squeeze the bride out of the line, refusing to give in to each other. After the groom removed the bride's hijab, the bride smiled happily, and the fight for the bed ended. Then the couple drank a glass of wine together.
Tujia young men and women return to their parents' home three days after marriage, commonly known as "returning to the door". They usually return on the same day.
The marriage customs of the Tujia people in western Hubei
The Tujia people are famous for their hard work, bravery, wisdom, and ability to sing and dance. Thousands of years of cultural accumulation have formed the colorful Tujia people. culture. As one of the important contents of Tujia culture, the marriage customs of Tujia people are also spectacular and eye-catching.
The marriage customs of the Tujia people in western Hubei are very similar to those of the Tujia people in other places, but they are also unique. The wedding movement can be divided into two stages.
1. Prelude to Wedding
In the long feudal society, men and women were not free to marry, and the union of boys and girls was entirely arranged by their parents, which is the so-called "parents' orders and matchmaker's words". Marriage begins with the proposal of marriage. Although the procedure is neat, it is a bit cumbersome.
Media support. The man asks someone who is well-spoken and familiar with the family situation of both parties (mostly women, commonly known as matchmakers) to come to the woman's home to propose marriage. After that, the woman also asks someone to secretly inquire about the man's family situation.
Combined eight characters. If the woman is interested, the matchmaker will exchange the birth dates of both men and women, and ask a fortune teller to "combine the horoscopes". If the horoscopes of a man and a woman match, they will be verbally married.
Engagement. If the horoscopes match, you can take them, so engagement is also called "taking the horoscopes". The man buys a red Geng Shu, writes the man's birth date, and then puts it in a refined invitation box. The matchmaker goes to the woman's home and fills in the woman's birth date in the same Geng Shu, which is considered a formal engagement.
Recognize relatives. The man selects an auspicious day and prepares Qi tribe tea (several portions of pork knuckles, noodles, etc.) to the woman's house, and the woman invites her relatives to gather in the main room. Under the light of lamps and candles, under the guidance of the matchmaker, the man was very humble, calling his father and mother, and his aunt and uncle.
Deadline. That is the date when the man goes to the woman’s house to announce the wedding. After that, the man's preparations entered the final stage. On the eve of the wedding, the man prepares a betrothal gift. The so-called "betrothal gifts" are nothing more than flour, wine, cakes, candies, and "long spears and short spears" (a pig with long hooves is called a long spear, and a pig with short hooves is called a short spear). Men who care about face often give each other whole pigs, which is called "gift pigs". The man also needs to prepare wedding clothes, and the woman is also busy preparing for the "dowry". During this period, the number of furniture, bedding, pots, bowls, mirrors, and accessories is increasing day by day. The bride is even embroidering and cutting, and rushing to make quilt covers, pillow covers, and shoes and socks for her parents-in-law.
Cry to get married. Crying marriages usually take place within ten days and a half before the wedding. The bride-to-be invites nearby girlfriends to help with needlework.
Silver needles flashed, colorful threads flew, the girls cried while doing it, crying but not sad, crying like sadness, crying with joy, crying like real joy, singing and crying mixed in, false and true, true and false, crying It is melodious and full of music, revealing the innocence and straightforwardness of Tujia girls. Its content includes crying for parents, crying for brothers and sisters, crying for sisters, crying for ancestors, etc.
The prelude to a wedding is a long process, ranging from one and a half years to ten to eight years. As for "baby kiss" and "fingertip wedding", it can last as long as ten or twenty years. .
Speaking of the Tujia people’s marriage customs, we cannot fail to mention a situation that is more popular among the Tujia people: the Tujia people like to “bring the aunt to the first cousin, and then the aunt to the first cousin to get married”, which is the so-called “kiss-to-cousin”. . There are common sayings: "My aunt's daughter, reach out and take it", "My aunt's sister, it's my own". Our ancestors lacked scientific knowledge about physiological inheritance and other aspects, and were only keen on "increasing close relatives", but they did not know the possible harm caused by incest marriage. In addition, the Tujia people also have the custom of "accepting a sister-in-law after the death of an elder brother, and a daughter-in-law after the death of a younger brother".
2. Wedding March
Tujia people commonly call wedding celebrations as "celebration celebrations". The most exciting thing is "accompanying ten sisters" and "accompanying ten brothers" during the wedding ceremony. ".
"Accompanying Ten Sisters" on the first night of the wedding celebration. It was the second or third watch of the night, the red candles on the "incense" were shining brightly, the smoke was rising, and several large tables were lined up in the middle of the hall. A number of candies, cakes, peanuts, melon seeds, fresh fruits, etc. were neatly displayed on the table, and "accompanying the ten sisters" began amidst the melodious and melodious music. First, the "zhikesi" (a person hired by the host who is eloquent, well-mannered and good at managing affairs) will invite some bold and singing girls to attend the wedding, and then a special person will arrange the seats. In the middle of the table is a shy and charming girl. The bride is accompanied by girls who are similar in age to the bride and like the bride. This is the so-called "accompanying girl". The other girls, young and old, sat down one after another. "Zhikesi" let go of his throat, cadenced, and after a simple congratulation, the order began. Sister songs (i.e. custom songs) are sung in order from east to west, starting with the "Opening Song" and then other songs. Most of them contain content such as praise, advice, romance, blessing, and joking. At the end of accompanying the ten sisters, they should sing the "Yuantai Song", such as "A pair of phoenixes fly out of the forest, followed by a pair of magpies. The phoenixes cry out for flowers to bear fruit, and the magpies call for fruit reunion. Flowers bear fruit, and fruit are reunited. Flowers and fruits are reunited for eternity." ." During the singing process, there are often climaxes. Some girls who are bold, good at singing and have loud voices often challenge each other and lead the way, making the relatives, friends and guests who are watching cheer in unison. The bride is often "forced" to sing a few songs, and her shy face overflows with joy.
The man’s procedure of “accompanying ten brothers” is basically the same as that of “accompanying ten sisters”, except that most of the members present are young men, and the content of the song is also slightly different. The atmosphere and interest are similar to that of “accompanying ten sisters”. Compared with "sisters", they are often much inferior.
After dawn on the day after "accompanying ten sisters" and "accompanying ten brothers", it is an auspicious day to get married. Early in the morning, dozens of people from the groom's party, led by "Mr. Esli" (the general manager of the wedding team), arrived at the door of the bride's house. When the man’s married relatives arrive, the woman will fire cannons and play music to welcome them, but the “door-stopping ceremony” is unavoidable. After the woman receives the bride price and the bride’s clothing and jewelry from the man, the woman’s wedding receptionist and the man’s wedding receptionist will have to wait for the wedding ceremony. Everyone shows off their talents and speaks eloquently, showing their Chinese culture and etiquette. If the man's etiquette is not good enough, or Mr. Li's argument is poor, he will be punished with alcohol, but the punishment is less serious. He is often punished in laughter, and even more Added some festive elements. But even so, Mr. Esri cannot be careless, maybe the woman will be more serious. Therefore, the man's husband is usually an eloquent and prestigious person.
While the woman is entertaining her bride-to-be and many relatives and friends, the bride-to-be is also putting on the final touches. After the banquet, the wedding team tied up the dowry. When the binding was ready, the bride was carried by her brother or brother to the center of the main room, saying goodbye to her ancestors and parents, and then carried the bride on the sedan. The bride never looked back until she arrived at her husband's house. She is carried to the groom's house and dropped down in front of the groom's house. The two bride-in-laws help the bride get out of the sedan. The bride kicks the threshold when entering the door (commonly known as "sealing", which means that the couple will have fewer quarrels in the future). On the third day after the wedding, the bride and groom return to their natal home together, which is commonly known as "returning to the home". You stay one night at your parents' house and return, but there are also people who return on the same day.
If the man marries the bride and returns on the same day, it is called a "door-to-door wedding". However, there are also cases where the man and woman are far away from each other, and the man's wedding team needs to stay overnight with the woman before returning the next day. This is called "Get married overnight." In some places, even if the two parties are not far apart, there are "overnight marriages". After liberation, the rural areas of western Hubei still had wedding etiquette customs such as "crying to marry" and "accompanying ten sisters", but the content has undergone some changes, and the etiquette has gradually faded, especially in cities and towns, and has basically disappeared.
The marriage customs of the Tujia people highlight the culture of the Tujia people and also reflect the national characteristics of the Tujia people, which include both the dross and the essence. "Sending betrothal gifts" and "combining eight characters" are rubbish, but the cultural essence reflected in customs such as "accompanying ten sisters" and "crying for marriage" should be spread and absorbed without hesitation.