1. The parents meet and negotiate.
The main thing is to set the almanac and the amount of the groom’s betrothal gift, which depends on the financial conditions of both parties. The gift money received will be returned according to the woman's financial conditions. If the woman's conditions are good, she will directly accept the entire gift money and buy a car for the man.
2. Choose a date
Generally in Wenzhou, you need to take the birth dates of both men and women to experts in the Book of Changes. The experts will give you several permutations and combinations for you to choose. It is recommended that the engagement date be chosen a little later, because there are many things that need to be prepared otherwise it will be very rushed. The wedding date can be closer to the engagement date, so that this tiring period will not be prolonged too long. Then the engagement date does not have to be on a weekend or a holiday, but the wedding date is preferably a weekend or a holiday.
3. Set an engagement banquet and a wedding banquet
In Wenzhou, engagement banquets and wedding banquets are generally hosted by both men and women, so the number of tables should be at least 20. Therefore, the engagement wine should be ordered three months in advance, and the wedding wine should be ordered one year in advance. Only then can we choose a hotel that everyone is satisfied with.
4. Purchase items needed for the engagement of two people
The man gives the woman: (1) A set of gold jewelry: including earrings, bracelets, (anklet) ), a necklace, a pair of rings, and a diamond ring.
(2) Wedding candies: including a pair of candied golden apricots. (Tangjinxing is made by dyeing white sugar red, frying it into thick juice, and then pressing it into a pomegranate shape with a mold, and then cooling it. This is a specialty of Wenzhou’s engagement ceremony, and you can’t see it in other places) Wenzhou The wedding candies are divided into different sizes. The man is responsible for all the wedding candies that the woman needs, including the red envelopes inside the wedding candies.
(3) Watch: In the past, it was a pair of watches, but now that various electronic products have the function of a watch, it is not easy to just buy one for the woman.
(4) Use cash instead of chicken, duck, fish and other six items.
If you buy it, the "six items" are: two crucian carp plates, two cuts of three-layer meat, a yellow grass chicken, a pair of pig belly, five pounds of longan, and ten pounds of cockles.
The popular "six items" now include: two pieces of Chinese cigarettes, a pair of liquor (Wuliangye or Wuliangshen), and a pack each of longan and lychee.
The woman gives the man:
(1) A suit, two shirts, two ties, and two pairs of shoes (one pair each of casual and leather shoes) that the man will wear when he gets married and engaged. Two sets of casual clothes, a dozen socks, and gold items: a bracelet and a necklace.
(2) A set of dishes: There are 88 pieces, 98 pieces, and 108 pieces to choose from. You can purchase them based on the situation. Now Wenzhou's stores are mainly concentrated on Jiefang Road and Feixia North Road. It is recommended to visit several companies and compare more, otherwise the price differences between the parties will be quite large. You also have to choose a day to send bowls. Wenzhou people have a saying called "wendang", which is homophonic to "bowl" in Wenzhou dialect.
(3) The woman’s “six things” are: citrus, pastries, dates, peanuts, longan, and lotus seeds.
Give the man a sugar-gold apricot in return. When the oranges are immature, they can be replaced with pomegranates. Pomegranates have many seeds, which also means giving birth to a child early.
5. Take engagement photos
Engagement photos can be decided according to your own needs. Engagements in Wenzhou are divided into large orders and small orders. The large order refers to the banquet for all relatives and friends present at the wedding party. , and Xiaodian refers to the engagement banquet where only close relatives are invited to attend.
Large orders may require some engagement photos for on-site decoration, but small orders do not have many requirements.
6. Engagement Day
Both parents and close relatives and friends held a banquet in a hotel to get engaged.
In the afternoon, the man drove to the woman’s home dressed up to greet her and her parents. After arriving at the hotel, serve tea to both parents and toast to relatives and friends to witness your love.