When it comes to love, many people may keep popping up all kinds of pink bubbles in their minds.
Some people can go through fire and water or even give their lives for love.
In the past, these stories seemed to only happen in romantic idol dramas, but now they are becoming more and more common around us.
Brain So, in order to better discuss this phenomenon, netizens named it "Love Brain".
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? How the love brain was born
Although the love brain is not a technical term, it does have corresponding psychological basis.
psychological research has found that when you are in love, it will stimulate the pleasure center of the brain, and at the same time, the secretion of dopamine, norepinephrine and epinephrine will increase, which is closely related to the feeling of pleasure.
But the reason why modern people are so crazy about love is closely related to economic development and social popular culture.
With the improvement of material conditions, people have more resources to invest in business emotions. At the same time, popular culture has also made many people find emotional sustenance and value in love, and regard love as a belief in their own lives.
The emotional outlook of our generation has been deeply influenced by movies, TV, novels and even cartoons.
People have a stronger motivation to pursue love, and at the same time, the physiological pleasure strengthens this behavior of pursuing love, so the love brain comes into being.
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? Typical manifestations of love brain
At the beginning of a relationship, "patients" of love brain are often extremely happy and excited.
maybe they have already begun to imagine the ultimate picture of each other's life together before the eight characters are left.
However, happiness must be accompanied by anxiety, moodiness and deep fear.
As soon as the "patients" fall in love, they often fall into the following situations:
Suspicion-sometimes feeling bursting with happiness, and sometimes feeling whether the other person has changed his mind;
anxiety-I want to contact each other all the time, and I can't wait to become a mobile phone that can be carried with each other;
Notre Dame plot-the desire to take care of each other, and feeling that you are the emotional "Nightingale";
to "self-centeredness"-feel that the other party is the center of the universe, and everything revolves around TA;
want to control each other-eager to get back the sense of control and security.
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How to get rid of the trouble of "love brain"?
lovelorn, for the brain "patients" who are in love, is a more terrible thing than the sky falling.
Love is an event where risks and opportunities coexist.
We may meet someone who really fits in with us, but we may also lose something important to ourselves in our feelings.
People who are "in love with brains" are more likely to invest more money in their feelings, on the other hand, they also have a higher risk of encountering PUA.
Wu Danru, a writer in Taiwan Province, once said, love is either gained or learned.
Every feeling in feelings can actually be a mirror, which allows us to see what we really look like. Intimacy is the strongest projection in interpersonal relationship, so it can make us know ourselves better.
To quit the love brain and not be trapped by love, you can try the following steps.
the first step is to treat feelings as a mirror.
this step actually applies to everyone who is in an intimate relationship.
in a relationship, the first thing we need to see is what kind of person we are. Knowing our emotions, emotions and behavior patterns, and having a clear understanding of our subconscious motives, we are more likely to make more rational choices and decisions in the process of choosing a spouse.
always remember to draw your attention back to yourself, and don't waste too much time guessing the other person.
step two, gradually reduce the time you spend on intimate relationships.
devote some time and energy to career planning, hobbies and getting along with friends. Choose something that can make you happy and feel positive value, so that you can have more sources of happiness and get more sense of accomplishment.
the third step is to reshape your emotional outlook.
For people who are in love with their brains, feelings often become a tragic thing. This is probably the product of a "dedication" culture. We always think that to love someone is to sacrifice, dedicate and pay. But in fact, if you don't realize what a behavior means to your own value, you will probably lose your rational judgment in your feelings and fall into the trap of PUA.
to reshape the concept of feelings is to realize what the value behind any behavior is to the self. Establishing contact with others and altruistic dedication are all done because these things are in line with our values. Instead of paying for paying, you really lose yourself.
loving yourself is the most important thing.
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Actually, for many people, they may have had the experience of falling in love with their brains.
Especially in those young and ignorant years ...
For love, we all start with imagination, and then we begin to get in touch with love, understand love and understand love step by step.
love is a beautiful thing, but all love begins with love for yourself.
If you are still in the state of "love brain", then slowly return to yourself and find this primitive love for yourself first, so as to avoid those panic, anxiety, suspicion and five dangers in love.
everyone can find their own happiness.