What kind of people should education cultivate (Yu)
Case introduction:
A, Male: 18 years old was admitted to the Department of Physics of Peking University, and after graduation, he entered the Department of Physics and Astronomy of the University of Iowa for postgraduate study. At the age of 28, he obtained his doctorate through defense. ...
B, boys: children of poor farmers, who were admitted to provincial key high schools with excellent results, were awarded the second prize of provincial "three good students" and "National Physics Olympiad", and then admitted to provincial key universities to study biotechnology. ...
C, boys: excellent physical education in junior high school, long-distance running skills, entered a key high school, failed in freshman seven subjects, and dropped out. ...
D. Girl: At the age of seven, her parents divorced and lived with her mother, with excellent grades and strong organizational skills. She successfully entered the provincial key high school, served as the monitor from junior high school until she graduated from high school. In high school, she was the best debater in the debate, an outstanding student cadre at the provincial level, and had a harmonious relationship with her classmates and teachers. She was admitted to Macau University of Science and Technology. ...
E, boy: at the age of 4, he was elected as the ambassador for the Olympic bid; He studied piano at the age of 4 and studied under Han Jianming, a famous piano professor at the Central Conservatory of Music. At the age of 8, he studied calligraphy and studied under Tsinghua University Fang Wenzhi; He won numerous awards, joined the national ice hockey team at the age of/kloc-0, attended the middle school attached to the National People's Congress and studied in the United States. ...
Q: Which of these students do you like best? Arrange them according to your preference? Why? What angle are they arranged at?
These people are real cases, and here is just a brief introduction. One thing needs to be explained: this is just an example, not all people who have had such an experience are like this. We just use these cases to illustrate the problems we want to talk about.
The first person is Lu Gang.
The Lu Gang incident was a shooting incident in which Lu Gang, a doctoral student from China who was studying at the University of Iowa, shot and killed several people in the campus of 199 1 1. The whole incident only took ten minutes. In these ten minutes, Lu Gang killed six people in a row, resulting in five deaths and 1 serious injuries. Finally, he shot himself.
Lu Gang was born in Beijing. 18 years old was admitted to the Physics Department of Peking University. 1985 After graduation, he entered the Department of Physics and Astronomy of the University of Iowa for postgraduate study. 199 1 year obtained the doctorate by defense. Some people say that Lu Gang is the first in every exam and the first every year. He doesn't allow himself to get the second place in the exam. The fuse of this incident is that his grades are second, and the first place is also a foreign student in China. Of course, this foreign student is the third person shot by Lu Gang.
The detailed process and follow-up questions about the Lukang incident can be searched online. It is said that Lu Gang later wrote a suicide note to his sister, which may reveal the whole psychological process of Lu Gang's incident, and you may also find the life track of Lu Gang's family education and growth.
This incident shocked China and the United States at that time, and also caused a discussion on the disadvantages of education in China. Because at that time, few people mentioned the concept of "family education". However, in the field of psychology, China has attached importance to the education of "adolescent mental health". I once joked that it has epoch-making significance in China's adolescent psychology, because it is precisely because of the "Lu Gang incident" that we began to pay attention to adolescent psychology.
The second place is Ma Jiajue. He was born in 198 1. He was a 2000-year-old student majoring in biotechnology in Yunnan University. He killed one person in the night of February 13, one person in the night of February 14, and two others in February 15, and then fled from Kunming Railway Station. He was issued an A-level wanted order by the Ministry of Public Security and offered a reward of 200,000 yuan for his arrest. On June 7, 2004, he was executed.
The third place is Han Han. Let's get to know Han Han first.
Han Han once said, "Lesson 7 is red, and the red light illuminates my future."
It is conceivable that Han Han talked about his own growth, his parents' education and his teachers' attitude towards him. He grew up in criticism, so he didn't show special anger when he experienced the ghost writing incident, because he was used to the unfair evaluation of outsiders from an early age. He said he was a beginner in sports. Based on the principle of being brave in the past, he was full of pride: "At that time, the teacher didn't like me, and the sports meeting insisted that I go long-distance running and wanted to see me make a fool of myself. I ran out at a speed of 100 meters and accidentally broke the school record. " Despite this, Han Han's sports strength hung a red light because he skipped classes too much, which directly led to his failure in eight subjects and seven subjects, and then he was persuaded to go home.
Zhou Libo once mocked Han Han for "writing and racing with high risks, and he can be called the king of scribes and military commanders." Han Han mainly relies on racing income. He doesn't sell money by words. What he said was just what he wanted to say, and he didn't care about other people's comments at all. Some people call Han Han the contemporary Lu Xun.
Therefore, we say that going to college is not necessarily good.
The fourth is a student from a key middle school in our province, which is also a real case. A very good girl, with strong organizational skills, good at getting along with others and good popularity. She is recognized as a good student by all teachers and parents. At that time, when her mother graduated from high school, she spoke in the whole school as the parents of outstanding graduates.
No one expected that in the eyes of outsiders, this excellent child actually committed suicide by jumping off a building. When the news reached the school, the children's teachers, principals, etc. They all felt that their education was a failure.
The fifth is Li Shuangjiang's son Li Tianyi. On the evening of September 6, 2065438+0/KLOC-0, Li Tianyi beat a couple with another young man named Su Nan because driving without a license modified a BMW, which led to his reeducation through labor for one year. So Li Shuangjiang was listed as one of the "four famous dads" on 20 1 1.
However, on the afternoon of February 22nd, 20 13, a news about Li Shuangjiang's son Li Tianyi's alleged gang rape went viral on the Internet, causing great repercussions in all walks of life in Beijing. A large number of reports from CCTV, Beijing TV and other media once again pushed Li Shuangjiang to the forefront of major media, causing great damage to his reputation. Li Tianyi has really become an "derailed" child!
Enlightenment from the case:
Case 1:
1. It has been 2 1 year since the Lugang incident. Because of this, our country began to pay attention to the psychology of teenagers. However, after more than 20 years, such vicious incidents have not decreased, but have increased, from his suicide to killing his parents. Why is this?
My understanding is that although psychology attaches importance to the mental health of teenagers, we have not found the root of the problem, that is, where is the fundamental core of educating people? We often find that problems start with problems, but we can't solve them. The reason is that we haven't found the root cause of the problem yet. Where is the fundamental problem of educating people? Not in school, not in society, not in the children themselves, but in the family, it solves the problem of family education and the fundamental problem of educating people.
The Lu Gang incident can illustrate this problem. Although psychology attaches importance to adolescent mental health education, there are more and more vicious incidents with social problems and educational system problems. Therefore, to identify the core of educating people is to start from the family, improve parents' family education literacy, and do a good job of prevention.
Secondly, in this incident, he shot and killed three brothers of Vice President Ann Clare, which was totally unexpected. After Ann Claire's memorial service, they held a press conference. They donated a sum of money in her name and announced the establishment of Dr. Ann Claire's scholarship fund for international students' psychology to comfort and promote the mental health of international students and reduce the occurrence of human tragedies.
At the same time, they read a letter to Lu Gang's parents, which said: At this moment, only your family is more sad than us. Please understand that we are willing to share this sorrow with you.
From this, I thought of the "Yao Jiaxin killed someone" incident, and then the two sides fought and even went to court.
Here, we can see that different countries and different cultural backgrounds reflect different minds and tolerance. What is the reason? This problem also deserves our consideration.
We have always said that China is a country of etiquette with a history of thousands of years of civilization, but today our people are not like this in the eyes of the world. Who are noisy people in public places, people who grab things without queuing, and people who litter everywhere? Are these problems related to our family education?
Case 2:
The Ma Jiajue incident represents the children of the poor. At that time, after his accident, there were different views on this matter in society. Some people say that he is an unforgivable devil, while others say that it is caused by social "discrimination". They sympathize with him and blame the society. If we examine his growth experience, we will find that his growth experience is very heartbreaking. His family is poor, but he is excellent in such a family. Unfortunately, because of his poor family, he was discriminated against by others.
Question: Is his motive for killing really social discrimination caused by poverty, as people who sympathize with him say?
Li Meijin, a professor of criminal psychology at that time, personally went to Yunnan to investigate the case, designed a psychological questionnaire for Ma Jiajue, made a psychological test, and then wrote tens of thousands of words of "Ma Jiajue Criminal Psychological Analysis Report". The report points out that the psychological problems that really determine Ma Jiajue's crime are his strong and depressed emotional characteristics, distorted outlook on life and "self-centered" personality defect.
Therefore, she refuted the so-called poverty and social discrimination, saying: If Ma Jiajue really kills people because of poverty and discrimination, then the target of his revenge should be those who discriminate against him because he is rich. But the fact is, most of the victims are classmates who are as poor as him, even including his best friend and one of the friendliest people around him. Therefore, Ma Jiajue's murder has nothing to do with poverty or discrimination. It is not society that should be responsible for this bloody case, but Ma Jiajue himself.
We analyze this case from the perspective of family education, so my question is: Who caused this result in Ma Jiajue?
We know that everyone objectively has some natural social support systems, such as parents, teachers and leaders. And the most direct influence on our growth is our parents, because parents are children's first teachers and lifelong teachers, and the influence of parents' words and deeds on their children's life is irreplaceable by anyone. Everybody right?
So we undertake a more important task than imparting knowledge, that is, educating people. So our family education is the foundation of all education.
Case 3:
Although Han Han has passed 12 years, students like Han Han are very common at present, and this kind of underrated students are also discriminated against in school. But now it seems that it is such children with independent personalities that their personalities are often the healthiest. He has withstood blows and setbacks and stubbornly lived in people's discrimination.
This is also the reason why Han Han teased himself: "Seven classes are red, and the red light illuminates my future." Therefore, he didn't show any special anger when he experienced the ghost writing incident, because he was used to the unfair evaluation of outsiders from an early age.
Question: If you were a child or student like Han Han, what would you do?
What kind of attitude will reflect the quality of our education.
Case 4:
This girl's incident is even more common. Searching for college students or graduate students to commit suicide on the Internet will bring countless information. As for the causes of suicide, there are academic and employment pressures, emotional frustration, depression and so on. My parents divorced at the age of seven, and I have been living with my mother. I have excellent grades, cheerful personality and strong organizational skills. I have been a monitor since junior high school and graduated from high school. I am the best debater in the high school debate competition, an outstanding student cadre at the provincial level, and an international student who has a harmonious relationship with classmates and teachers. I was admitted to Macau University of Science and Technology ... In the eyes of outsiders, why did such an excellent child choose to commit suicide? What does she lack?
Although she is a single-parent family, she is not lacking in love. Contrary to Han Han's growth, she had a smooth journey. What she lacks is the ability to resist pressure and setbacks, and lacks a sound personality.
Case 5:
We say that "virtue" is the foundation of being a man and the minimum quality that should be possessed.
What is the highest evaluation for a person?
I think the highest evaluation of a person is "education". When a person stands in the society as an independent individual, people often give him an evaluation through his behavior, and his own quality represents his family education accomplishment. That is, upbringing.
Some netizens commented that Li Tianyi's education is: attaching importance to art, lacking education and losing education.
I also said that his parents created all conditions for him to cultivate his professional skills, but did not give him an education to be a man, which harmed him and society! Therefore, the success of any career can not replace the failure of family education!
I want to give you these cases today to guide you to discuss: what kind of people should we cultivate? What do children really need? What children want is not given by their parents, and what parents give is not what children need.
Answer a few questions first:
1, why should we have children?
2. As parents, what kind of children do we need?
3. What kind of education should we give our children? That is, what is the most important education for children? Or what is the core of education?
4. What is the education that children lack most at present?
Every year, the beginning of school and the end of the final exam are high-risk periods for students to commit suicide, which is also directly related to the quality of our education, some because of teachers and some because of parents.
A blog post on 65438+1October 19: the exam ranking has dropped. 14-year-old boy jumped to his death.
February 25th, Weibo: winter vacation homework did not finish writing a 13-year-old boy who committed suicide on the first day of school.
65438+ 10 20th, Qilu Evening News, published by Weibo entitled "Female college students died by jumping off a bridge after leaving a suicide note, saying that the pressure was too great".
Whether primary school students or college students, or even senior three students aged 65,438+08 years before Korla, the reasons for their suicide are not only the pressure from the education system or various aspects, but also our lack of anti-frustration ability and life education for them. Therefore, it is very important to carry out sound personality education for children.
Children nowadays lack the ability to cope with life. Parents take care of everything in life and deprive their children of basic living ability. They will leave their parents and face the society independently one day. If one day their parents are gone, how can the children live? Can they be happy?
Essay from Weibo:
Primary school: "If you don't study hard, you won't be admitted to junior high school in the future."
Junior high school: "If you don't study hard, you won't be admitted to senior high school in the future."
High school: "If you don't study hard, you won't be admitted to college in the future."
University: "If you don't study hard, you won't find a job in the future."
Boss: "Are you too busy studying at school ..."
Mr. Wu Jiaxiang said that "spoiling equals framing", which I think is worthy of the taste of parents all over the world. Li Tianyi is not so much "cheating" as Li Shuangjiang's "cheating"-it is Li Shuangjiang's doting that leads to Li Tianyi's today.
Story sharing:
I once heard a story that one day a man wanted to hang a picture on the wall, so he was busy looking for a hammer and nails. When he hammered the nail into the wall, he found that the nail couldn't hang the picture at all. What shall we do? He said, You can only wedge the small wood into the wall with a wooden wedge and then nail it firmly. He went looking for wood. Found the wood and found it too big. I went to find another axe, found it uncomfortable to use wood, and went to find a saw. When I got the saw, I found that the saw blade was broken, so I went to find the saw blade. Do one thing at a time. When he gets everything ready, he doesn't know what to do. He has forgotten the painting.
Ji Bolun, a famous Lebanese poet, once lamented: "We have gone so far that we forgot why we started."
We educate our children differently. It is the common wish of every parent to make them happy. However, in the process of children's growth, with the continuous expansion of our utilitarian heart, we pin our unfinished wishes on our children and let them complete them for you. Because your work is not satisfactory, you must let your children surpass you in the future; When you see your neighbor's children admitted to a key high school, you are busy applying for an Olympic math class for your children, and when you see your colleague's children admitted to Tsinghua, you are busy looking for a teacher to help your children. Let children lose their childhood, happiness, freedom and health, and finally be overwhelmed, and take the most extreme approach: destroy themselves! By that time, it will be too late to regret everything!
Therefore, it is our hope that children will grow up happily and healthily, so it doesn't matter how well they do in the exam. Let children cherish life, not only their own life, but also the lives of others, so living is the most beautiful thing. No matter what kind of things are compared with life, everything is "floating clouds", and living healthily and happily is the most important thing, so the ultimate goal of education is to cultivate a sound personality.
The most important thing for us is to cultivate a person with a sound personality who can face the society alone. This should be the bottom line and the most basic. Then, according to the children's own abilities, they can realize their self-worth and make greater contributions to society.
Share a sentence that Zhang Quanling, a famous host of CCTV, said in Weibo, in order to encourage each other: "Take good care of yourself and don't give your children any trouble when you are old. Educate your children well, and don't give trouble to the society when you are old. "