I have a friend. She is almost 3 years old now. She is a handsome and lovely person, but her feelings are slow to move.
There are many people who pursue her, but she always refuses her for various reasons. She told me that a boy in the same unit chased her for two years, afraid of giving her pressure, so he remained unknown and only appeared when she needed it and gave her care. However, they went to the movies the other day, and the boy made it clear that he wanted to associate with her, which upset her.
she said that although we have known each other for two years, we haven't had much contact, only a few meals together, and I don't know him very well. How can I be sure if he is a single-minded person?
I'm surprised. Isn't it enough to chase you silently for two years? How rare it is in this society today.
she added, who knows if he had a crush on other girls during this period? Before being nice to me, I always said that it was out of my friends' concern and told me not to think too much. Maybe this is not considerate, but his routine of picking up girls? Is it because his feelings for me are not firm?
for a moment, I was speechless.
later, I said, you thought so much, but the most important thing was that I didn't listen to you. I asked you, do you like him?
she was stunned, and the answer was that she didn't know.
I asked again, are you happy with him?
she said, be happy, I feel very chatty.
as soon as I strike the table, by the way, I want to choose someone who can make you happy!
There was a moment's stretch in her eyebrows, but then she looked sad and muttered something, didn't she? But I'm not sure. I want to get married, but I'm afraid I can't make it to the end.
A person who is usually vigorous and resolute, but at this time, his eyes are full of panic and bewilderment.
Later, she cried. She said, after the last time he played both sides, I felt that it didn't matter whether I liked it or not, as long as it was reliable.
it seems that pleasure is not so important, and the most important thing is never to be betrayed.
You see, many people who claim to be "unmarried" are just afraid of love and marriage. At first, it was only for the heart, then considering the economic conditions of personality, and finally asking for nothing, as long as it is reliable. I forgot to ask if my heart was happy because of him. But the more I want nothing, the more my heart is closed.
2
Chen Yihan is getting married, and this news has become the most pink entertainment event on Tanabata. Accompanied by the blessing, there is also controversy about her 47 love affairs.
In an early variety show, she claimed that her ex-boyfriend could form a basketball team, but her goal was to form a football team. Even her mother said to Chen Yihan's boyfriend, "I'll remember your name after three months.". The boyfriends she dated ranged from three weeks to three years. How many have she dated? She herself can't count.
Therefore, she was identified as "love rat without a window".
someone asked, how much love is needed to talk about so many times?
and I want to ask, how brave is it to dare to love and be loved constantly?
In the program Flowers and Teenagers, when Summer Xu burst into tears because she was lost, and when Zheng Shuang looked sad because of pressure, she always kept her best state, which was everyone's energy responsibility. In life, she also lived a wonderful and independent life: wearing dirty braids, swimming naked, diving and even kissing strangers.
she said, "what is courage? For me, I dare to love and sweat, dare to be hated, dare to accept the fact, dare to be happy alone, dare to get up without hesitation, dare to do what I say, dare to take a cold bath in winter ... A lot, but what I really insist on most is the courage to be loved and abandoned. "
it takes courage to love.
She knows that the ending of love is not always happy, but if she doesn't try, she doesn't even have a chance of happiness.
love what I love and do what I do. Avoid false independence and over-rational defense, and feel the emotional feelings in the process of self-growth and self-communication with others wholeheartedly, so as to enjoy the process of love.
True love is that I love you, and I enjoy and cherish my time with you.
and most of us are, I love you and I want you for a lifetime. If there is no life, I would rather miss it and not love it.
3
If someone told you with certainty that you would divorce in the future, and the person you chose would eventually turn your back on you, would you still firmly enter this marriage?
this is a choice I have faced.
when we were about to get engaged, my mother found someone to match the eight characters and concluded that we were incompatible and would divorce. Mother panicked and she never agreed to the marriage; I panicked, too, and I didn't know what to do.
That day, my father and I had the following conversation:
"Why did you hesitate?"
"Because of fear"
"Afraid of what? Afraid of divorce or betrayal? "
"I'm afraid of divorce, but I'm more afraid of betrayal."
"then dad asks you, can you guarantee that you will be single-minded all your life?"
"..."
"Ask yourself again, what kind of person is he? Do you believe him? Do you think he is an irresponsible person? Ask yourself, don't tell me. "
"..."
"No one can guarantee a lifetime. Feelings belong to two people, and happiness or misfortune is the result of the interaction of two people. If one day you are unhappy, it is better to see each other than to see each other. Maybe you will want to break up more than him. Breaking up at that time was even a relief. Who betrayed who? Every marriage has risks, external incentives and internal contradictions, but first of all, your own feelings should be strong, and you should be yourself and have a clear conscience. You only need to consider two points: 1. Do you still believe in your original vision and his character? 2. Can you handle the problems in your relationship and have the ability to cope with risks? "
When you get married, you must be full of expectations. Who will step into marriage with the fear of divorce?
Fear of marriage breakdown is different from fear of betrayal. Fear of the breakdown of marriage is the inner respect and belief in marriage, because of this respect, you will try your best to manage the feelings of two people; Fear of betrayal is a lack of trust in the other party, and it is also impossible to believe that you have the ability to cope with the crisis and manage this relationship well.
4
There are two couples in the movie Ex-3, one of whom broke up. I secretly cared about protecting you, but in the end I didn't get together. The other couple broke up, we went out for drinks and quarreled, and finally we fell in love with each other more and more.
it takes courage to love, and it needs a little hesitation. Jia Lin and badon min are still in love, but they are duplicitous, and one will never keep them. They care silently but dare not keep each other around, afraid of repeating the same mistakes, being afraid of contradictions and being injured again.
rational self-protection pushes the other person further and further.
But love is about opening your heart and being honest with each other. It's about letting the other person know everything about you and believing that he won't hurt you. It's about knowing that there may be a quarrel and that the future is uncertain, but I don't want to live up to each other's sincerity at this moment. I still want to be with you and try to make it to the end.
Actually, it takes more courage to grasp happiness than to endure pain.
Therefore, as long as it is worthwhile at this moment, good feelings should not be given up.
while you're young, brave enough to love.