Marriage Customs in Yan'an, Shaanxi
1. Marriage Selection
At that time, from the age of 13, parents would ask someone to select a partner for their children and get to know each other's family. Fundamentals (generally up to three generations of ancestors, whether there are body odors, outsiders, drummers, sedan bearers, donkey pullers, etc.), family style (generally refers to the way a family behaves in the world, if the outside influence is not good, it is called popularity Improper), situation (mainly refers to money, food, family property), character (generally refers to the character of a family, mainly refers to the appearance of the chosen person), Bazi (referring to the year, month, day, and time of the chosen person's birth? Is it a crime? The moon is in conflict with each other) and other situations. If you are a good match, you can invite a suitable intermediary (i.e. matchmaker) to arrange a marriage proposal. During this period, neither the man nor the woman knew the reason, and they never met. Things are different now. Young men and women are free to fall in love. No one is willing to engage in this kind of trick. A few parents with backward ideas can only do it behind others' backs.
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2. Proposal for marriage
Generally, the man proposes marriage to the woman. Even if the woman’s parents fall in love, they will use a matchmaker to signal the man’s parents to propose marriage to the woman. At this time, the matchmaker plays the leading role. After understanding the intention of the other party, the matchmaker learns about the parent, family background, background, character, horoscope, etc. through relatives and friends. Depending on whether it is suitable, they come up with an idea and pass the word through the matchmaker. The matchmaker finds out that it is the child. If there is any obstruction, you must use your sharp tongue to get rid of it.
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3. Engagement
After being negotiated by the matchmaker and approved by the parents of both parties, the engagement ceremony will be held on an auspicious day (usually both days of the month). Generally, it is held at the groom's house in the north of the county, and in the woman's house in the south of the county. The man takes out cigarettes and wine and drinks the engagement wine. Later, the matchmaker announces the "betrothal gift" and engagement clothes based on the money and materials agreed with the parents of both parties in advance, and then the matchmaker announces the wedding ceremony. The man's parents hand over the money and items one by one to the matchmaker, who then hands them over to the girl's parents. The woman also gives the man (i.e. the new son-in-law) shoes, socks and trouser belts through a matchmaker. Folks call the shoes "stable shoes" and the trouser belts "longevity belts" to show that the marriage relationship will be stable and long-lasting.
The parents agree on the wedding date, the bride's clothing and the wedding ceremony, and then both parties prepare for the wedding according to the agreement. A large part of the elderly farmers in Yan'an believe in superstition and worship ghosts and gods. As for when to get married, you must ask Mr. Yin and Yang to read your birth date and make sure the month is auspicious. For example, the rooster is in March, the pig is in September, the rabbit is afraid of April and May, the snake is the rabbit, the monkey is chasing the pig, the two are not welcoming in the black year, and so on. In fact, this is just a model that people come up with to constrain their behavior based on the zodiac animals. It has no scientific basis. They have decided on an auspicious day and time, and the man's family will write a Geng sticker to the girl's family, type it in a class (put the written Geng sticker inside the clothes prepared for the bride), and give it to the woman together with the bride price. This means: It's time for the girl to get married!
Three days before the auspicious day, the bride goes door-to-door to pay homage to the elders of the clan, pours wine for the elders, and drinks with relatives and friends. The groom's father crowns his son. The next day, a red piece of paper was written on the name of the child, which is now the weak crown, and the official name is changed. It was posted on the door to indicate adulthood. At the same time, the girl's family began to close the house, set up a banquet for her uncle, and invited the family members. At this time, the girl to be married had already hidden in the boudoir and no longer appeared in public. She spent all day learning etiquette from her mother, making needlework, and talking about the love between mother and daughter. The girl's heart was jumping like a little rabbit, and she was anxiously waiting for the auspicious day to get into the sedan chair and set off. But when it was time to get into the sedan chair, she cried loudly to show her love for her parents.
5. Marriage
Marriage is a folk tradition. The man’s family calls it “Yin (welcome) daughter-in-law”, and the woman’s family calls it “married daughter”. In the old days, weddings usually lasted three days. On the first day, relatives and friends come to congratulate or help, which is called "gathering guests". The hired manager will preside over the ceremony and arrange for friends (relatives and friends from the village or guests) to do chores such as cooking and entertaining guests. That night, hand music was played and the happy event began. After breakfast the next day, the wedding team was ready to set off. The wedding team usually consists of seven people, among whom there is a welcoming woman (or aunt, or sister-in-law), commonly known as the welcoming woman. (Folks pay attention to: If the aunt doesn’t welcome, the aunt won’t send it off.?). The wedding team must have a leader who understands etiquette and is eloquent. If the bride encounters a problem, he must be able to deal with it and resolve it skillfully. Before setting off, he must be prepared to carry the bride’s clothes, bedding, jewelry, silverware, large steamed buns (10 pieces), and pork. (1 piece), mother-in-law cake (2 rolls), clear oil (half bottle), chopsticks, white flour (1 small package), pocket money, lock money and unfinished betrothal money. Everything is ready, three cannons are fired, and the cannons are fired to set off. The drummers are playing music in the front, welcoming the mother-in-law and aunt in the middle, and the rest of the people and animals follow. If you encounter temples or villages, you must blow trumpets and play music as you pass by; you must also blow trumpets (commonly known as "Zhang Hao") when crossing rivers and Weiwei.
In advance, the bride’s family also prepares according to the agreement, arranges dowry, prepares wine and meals, makes appointments with relatives and friends, and organizes a send-off team (usually composed of 8 people, including 2 women accompanying the send-off, commonly known as "give-off mother-in-law"). ) When the wedding reception arrives, a table is set up in the courtyard of the bride’s house, with tobacco and alcohol on it. The steward toasts three glasses of wine to the reception leader to show welcome. The reception leader places everything he brings on the table one by one. Explaining the case is called "showing courtesy".
After the meal, the head of the bride's family told the wedding leader about the dowry items, and returned them with double the amount of money in the box, money in the bag, oil, noodles, chopsticks, etc. Everything is ready and ready to go. The bride puts on her trousseau and puts on a "hijab" (made of red flower quilt or red silk) and gets on the sedan. She rushes to see off her mother-in-law and gets on the horse. The trombone blows and the player goes first. The welcoming and seeing-off procession proceeds in an orderly manner, with the welcoming aunt at the front, the bride in the middle, and the sending-off aunt at the back. At this time, the sound of suona came into my ears, and it swayed out of the village in a mighty way. If something good happens, cigarettes and wine can be placed by the roadside. The welcoming and seeing-off team must stop moving forward, and the flute player will play three songs on the spot, three ups and three downs, before they are allowed to go.
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On the way, if two welcoming teams meet in the same direction, there is a custom of "fighting for the way". When fighting for the road, usually in order to avoid disputes, the leaders of both parties will, after negotiation, often let the first to pave the road with needles to indicate a new path for the following; if they meet each other, the brides of both parties should exchange trouser belts or sewing kits, both of them. Use needle strips to make a new path. When entering the village, the speed must be slowed down. The trumpeters showed off their skills, playing "Victory Order", "General's Order", "Large Arrangement" and other music. The villagers gathered around and it was very lively. At this time, the father-in-law and the mother-in-law enter the bridal chamber, pick up pillows and walk around in a circle, commonly known as "carrying grandchildren". Family members should cover up and grind, fearing that the green dragon and white tiger will bring happiness. Everything is ready, waiting for the newcomer to come in.
After the welcoming and seeing-off procession enters the door, a special room is set up for reception. The bride needs to be helped off the horse (or sedan chair) by the leader of the sending-off party, and the groom takes off his hijab. The two of them step on the red veil one after the other. The felt goes to the bridal chamber (commonly known as the tent kiln). Before that, the trumpeter must go in and blow the trumpet, calling "charge the account". Immediately, a man held a bowl of wheat leaves, small coins, and grains and sang while scattering them, which is called "spreading the tent." After the couple enters the bridal chamber, a child brings water for the bride to wash her face, and the bride has to give a small amount of money as a reward. The bride gets on the kang, collects the things that have been pressed on the four corners of the mat (including needles and threads, walnuts, dates, coins, etc.), which is called "stepping on the four corners", and then sits quietly in front of the kang. Afterwards, give away the seats (eight bowls of food). The groom should give a toast and give gifts, and the leader of the bridegroom should reciprocate with money, which is called "folding the banquet mouth" among the people.
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A head-hanging ceremony is held after the meal. The sister (husband) or aunt (husband) presides over the ceremony, asking the newlyweds to sit back-to-back on the bucket, comb their hair together, and sing while combing: One wooden comb with green silk clouds covering the moon, two wooden combs for two people to get married. The couple with three wooden combs will always be harmonious, and the four wooden combs will ensure peace in all seasons. The new son-in-law looks like Yang Zongbao, and the new daughter-in-law looks like Mu Guiying. Buckwheat roots and corn cobs, one kisses the other. When raising a boy, you need to be good, wearing a long gown and a hat; when raising a girl, you need to be smart, like pomegranates and peonies. Double pairs of walnuts, double pairs of dates, double pairs of children running around the bed. A perfect match is made in heaven, and the husband and wife will love each other for a lifetime. Immediately, red dates and walnuts were poured from the head of the newlyweds, and the couple scrambled to pick them up into their pockets. Then, the host will tie the bride's head into a bun, which means that the married couple can grow old together. Later, the brother-in-law, uncle-in-law, and sworn brothers also had sex (commonly known as "sex room"), which meant the two newcomers made various affectionate gestures in public. Guests performed and newcomers performed, making the audience laugh. After the quarrel was over, the mother-in-law put her children in from the window, hoping to have her grandson soon. This night, the lights in the account room (bridal chamber) should be kept on all night.
In the early morning of the next day, the young couple will eat food for their children. After the meal, they will hold a ceremony of "worshiping people", "unveiling the box" and meeting the mother-in-law. On that day, the groom's family sends guests, the bride returns home, and the groom goes with her acknowledgment gifts. The next day, the young couple was sent back by their parents-in-law, which was called "sent back to meet". After eight days, the bride needs to stay at her parents' house for seven days and then return, which is called "seven to eight".
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The above are the more traditional wedding customs in Yan'an area. Most areas conduct marriage ceremonies according to these five major procedures.