In the middle of last year, Xiao Chan and her husband got a divorce and signed it. The reason for divorce is that the husband completely ignores the hard work of his wife who has to take care of the children and work at home. Men generally believe that this is what women should do. We quarreled more often, and everyone was tired, so we finally decided to divorce.
/kloc-married in 0/3 years, with two children. I've only been divorced for a few months, and I was informed of my remarriage yesterday, the last day of 16. Jump out: I'm back in the cage. She was unhappy in this marriage, but she went back anyway. Why do you think of her? She said, I went back to see the children, but I didn't expect his mother to have tears and a runny nose, saying that the children were pitiful, that there was no mother, that others couldn't take care of them well, and that they were easy to get sick … and so on. My father-in-law said that as long as she came back, she would be given something to make her live better and stay at home with peace of mind. Looking back, my husband said, your parents said that you are not coming back? You can feel the sigh of Xiao Zen through the screen. She said, since everyone said so, I really can't be so cruel. Their family is still very kind to me, but I still feel sorry for my children. It is fate that two people can get married together. It is right not to give up on each other easily, but if you choose to divorce and remarry, you should think twice.
The first question to consider is whether there will be contradictions between the two sides after the divorce and remarriage. The second is whether you want to be with this person or because of some external factors other than this person. After all, you have to understand that you are getting married again, not with the other family or other relationships. Your relationship with your children will not change because of your divorce. You will always be the mother of your children. However, if you wait for these conditions to remarry because your child or his family is very kind to you, then there is actually no need to remarry in this marriage. Only your husband will be with you. Besides, everything else will change. Parents are 100 years old, and their children are married.
You need to determine whether your ex-husband wants to go with you for life or to remarry with you, because he just wants to change the bad situation now, and you are the best person to deal with these bad situations. A marriage that remarries because of feelings can ensure the smooth future. If there is no motivation to remarry on this basis, then you may fall into the whirlpool of divorce and remarriage cycle. Struggle until the day of collapse.
A marriage that is not divorced is broken. Some marriages, once divorced, can better reflect each other's preciousness. I have a friend around me who always advises us to separate. His view is that you don't know whether this person is really important in your heart until two people are separated. Because he is the beneficiary of this separation. He and his wife are college classmates. They have been in love for seven years, and they were 365,438+0 years old when they divorced. After three years of marriage, I have been living a life of neither salty nor light. There is no quarrel, no dispute, and suddenly one day, I feel that this is not the love and marriage I want, or that the other person is not the person I want. Finally, the two negotiated a divorce. Friends who have regained their freedom are not as comfortable as they think.
He wants to find the kind of love that can stimulate the nerves, but he didn't expect to meet any of them, or he was afraid when he met them. He thinks it needs a lot of energy, or he is playing games, and the life state in which his wife brings him tea and meals is what he wants most. I really regret it. Both of us regret it. I remarried. After being together, they are now an ordinary and happy couple.
My friend said that I would never have this idea again, and my wife is the most suitable now. Any passion is bullshit. He felt that if he hadn't been divorced once, he didn't realize how much he loved his wife. This is based on love, based on the feelings between two people, and remarriage without any other external conditions. Such a marriage, once again, will only be better.
When a man asks you to remarry, he will talk about how important you are to this family and how inseparable you are. I think this should be cautious. It is important to find out whether he can't live without you or his family can't live without you. In addition, there is another kind of man who should be cautious when he remarries, that is, his family asked you to remarry, and he was the last one.
Men subconsciously can't help but see the person they really like, either looking for you or can't help it. This is between you two. If someone comes to persuade you to remarry, do you live with the person who advised you to remarry or with him?
Be cautious in divorce and more cautious in remarriage. Marriage is not like love. Marriage is to pay legal responsibility to each other. Now that we are divorced, we should figure out why we divorced in the first place, and whether we can put it down and turn the page. It is easy for people to mistake "what he needs" for "what he likes". And whether a person really has you in his heart, you know, unless you are willing to deceive yourself.
The book Make Friends with Time says: Many people actually don't know what their so-called "like to do something" is, because it is relatively simple and easy to get rewards.
It is easy for both men and women to fall into such a problem. A man likes a woman very much because she can take good care of him, his family and his relatives. Such a wife makes him feel at ease, so he likes it very much. This woman is what the book says "likes to do something". A good marriage must be done with heart. Since going through a divorce didn't make you smart enough to go to school here, you can only pretend to be here next time.
Having a divorce experience should make you more aware of what you want. If you thought of children when you remarried, what made you give up your children when you divorced? In fact, these are all excuses you made for yourself. The more remarried due to external factors, the more fragile the marriage will be. If it is not for the sake of two people coming together in the future, such a marriage should be considered more when remarrying. Whether the contradiction of the last divorce has been resolved, if not, just because I can't bear to part with it or let it go, or remarry again for other reasons, such a marriage will only be more unstable. Getting married once may be a mistake in choice, yes or no, but divorcing the same person twice is your problem, which may be bigger.
Whether you are married or remarried, if you are responsible for yourself and others, you need to think twice before you act.