After her death, her parents said that Lin told her experiences to the four girls in the story. After watching Lin Yi's 16-minute video, I believe that this talented girl chose this writing style because she felt that she had suffered too much and had to divide it into four parts in order to keep the readers reading. On the other hand, Lin claimed that at the back of the story, she took "evil" as her pen name, hoping that every audience could feel the pain.
In the video interview, Lin made it very clear that her writing is unwilling to be associated with those unfathomable words, and she has no intention of changing the social status quo. He just wants to express and torture himself: "Is art a rhetoric?" Or is coincidental color the essence of art? I don't want to talk about the relationship between art and rhetoric. I noticed that her parents chose to escape after her death.
They said that through this book, my daughter hopes to avoid more similar tragedies with her own life experience, and I hope that everyone will stop focusing on her daughter's sexual assault and violence.
His parents subconsciously think that they are ashamed of their daughter Lin's rape, and they still feel ashamed, which has caused deeper harm to Lin to some extent, or an unavoidable curse to her.
Over the years, Lin suffered from depression, mental illness and mental torture. She once described her pain like this. A series of parallelism sentences were told to her by her psychologist: "You have experienced the Vietnam War ..." Years later, he also said: "You have experienced a concentration camp. Years later:" You have experienced a nuclear explosion ...
However, Lin believes that the greatest pain in the world does not come from the explosion, but from the atrocities of Fang Siqi (the heroine in Lin's novels).
I understand the pain that this woman, that is, Lin's inner world has suffered. Like thousands of troops, she runs, humiliates and tortures a wound repeatedly every day, without stopping for a moment.
How much pain does everyone have to go through before they can use this word to describe their inner scars? "Those who survived after coming out of the concentration camp often have a hope when writing that this kind of thing will never happen again in human history, but when writing, I am sure that this kind of thing will continue to happen, not to mention the whole world and Taiwan Province Province, now, now and now." That's what Lin said. When I read this sentence, I am also convinced that, including the moment you read this sentence, a girl whose name we don't know is experiencing such terrible misfortune in a corner of the world.
Lin's birth, family background, appearance, talent, temperament and knowledge far exceed most ordinary girls.
However, the intense pain she felt, like a monster, overcame the girl's other advantages.
If you regard a person as a whole, you must think that "being sexually assaulted is a crime in itself", then the beauty of Lin accounts for about 98 points, while the ugliness of being sexually assaulted accounts for 2 points. Unfortunately, her attention was focused on sexual assault.
Those injured girls won't pull off her feet. The courage not to fight evil will remain in the abyss of evil forever.
When Lin was sexually assaulted, she carefully asked her mother what she would think if a classmate was sexually assaulted at school.
Mother immediately coldly concluded: "That girl must be very coquettish", which made her give up the idea of asking her parents for help.
However, when she tentatively asked her mother, "It seems that there is no sex education in our family", her mother replied, "What sex education? Sex education for people who need sex.
Therefore, after being raped, the girl felt only the indifference and hostility of her relatives. She recited all this silently, afraid to tell her family.
This reminds me of a short story when I was learning English translation:
One day, a soldier called his mother and said, "I have a comrade-in-arms who hurt his leg to save me." I want to take him home to take care of him. "
Mom said, "OK, but how long will it take?"
The soldier said, "When he died."
Mother said, "You will ruin your life. I don't agree. " So the soldier hung up the phone.
The next day, the police told the mother that her son had committed suicide. When she saw the photo at the scene, she cried because the man in the photo had no legs.
Without knowing that her son's legs were disabled, the mother thought that caring for the disabled would ruin her life when her child committed suicide.
Lin's experience, to some extent, is similar to that of the soldier in this story. She was hurt, but her mother's answer made her understand that she didn't help.
In Lin's life, he didn't have enough courage to stand up against those who hurt himself, so he internalized the pain and injury and then hurt himself.
After the book was published, she finally had the courage and strength to face all this. She could have continued to resist, but she chose the cruel way of suicide.
From the video interview with Lin, we can see that this is a beautiful girl who is versatile and gentle. Because of this, she is convinced of the beauty of literature and wants to maintain a "good" posture. Perhaps because of this, she never went to court to sue the teacher who hurt her and three other people.
Her soul has passed away, no one can understand her inner pain, and no one can really feel the pain of others.
But I dare say: Maybe, because she is a real young woman in literature, slimmer than the average girl and has a gentle and kind heart, her pain will be more intense, more intense and more lasting.
She lives in her own pain and will never get out. She stayed in the same place all her life and was in the shadow all her life, so she ended her pain with death.
When you are scarred, the people closest to you are not supportive, but indifferent to you. At this time, you will find that you are alone, how lonely and terrible it is to face the pain imposed on you by the world!
Parents should be their children's eternal harbor and their strongest backing. No matter how big or small the child is, as long as he is hurt, he should feel the support and protection of his family.
Moreover, this is the meaning of affection: in our long life, we are always injured, bleeding and heartbroken. Affection is the reliance of our hearts, the healing medicine of our soul wounds and our armor against the cruel world.
With this armor, even if we are occasionally hurt by monsters, we will have the energy to stand up and go to a brighter and brighter place of hope.
Lin's parents still consider it a "shame" that their daughter was beaten.
And I believe that her parents, as well as many others who think that "it is a shame for girls to be violated", will not be stingy with the second injury. It is these prejudices that make the tortured girl afraid to ask the people closest to her for help.