Jokes are super hilarious.
Jokes are super hilarious. You need an optimistic and humorous life in order to live a good life. Read some jokes from time to time to have fun and bring it to yourself. Come and have fun, share it with others, and make others happy. Here are some super hilarious jokes, let’s take a look. Super hilarious joke 1
1. Once upon a time, a man named Shuang died. On the day of the funeral, his family shed tears of pain and lay in front of his grave, crying and screaming, "Shuang" Ah, it feels so good... It feels so good... At this time, people passing by asked, "What are you enjoying?" The Shuang family responded with tears in their eyes: We are so happy...
2. This text message is concise and to the point, no advertising is inserted, throw away all the nonsense, the clichés are purely bubbling, just know yourself when you are happy, and happiness is definitely not gone. , let’s not talk about missing you, but a blessing works: all your wishes come true, happy New Year’s Day!
3. When New Year’s Day comes, gift-giving is too cliché, and there are no tricks in blessing. I can only wish my dear friends: I will be harassed by the God of Wealth every day, be illuminated by Maitreya Buddha all the time, make a lot of money, be happy and laugh, and follow happiness. run.
4. This New Year greeting message comes riding on the sweeping heat wave! May you have the financial resources of Buffett, the compact figure of Furong, the social status of Five Stripes, the enthusiasm to grab the salt tide, the enrichment of the flooded imperial capital, and happiness like the rising house prices!
5. One day, a death row prisoner was being executed. However, due to the quality of the bullets, the bailiff’s first shot didn’t go off, the second shot didn’t go off, and the third shot still didn’t go off. When the bailiff was about to fire the third shot, When the fourth shot was fired, the prisoner suddenly turned around and hugged the bailiff's leg, crying loudly: Brother, just strangle me to death, it's so damn scary...
6. The eight-character formula for cultivating one's health and nature, saying: Wo The scholar imitates the ox, and the scholar imitates the ox Shiwo. Recite it loudly five times on the balcony every morning, and your ears and eyes will become clearer and your appetite will increase. For your own health, you must persist!
7. In the new year, I hope you will have a "transcendent guerrilla": you can survive in desperate situations when you encounter difficulties. The longer you grow, the more you will look like a white-faced scholar. Your speech can be full of fun. Worries can make it impossible to grow any grass. Happiness can make you happy. It is here and now, and I wish you a happy life!
8. This text message is sincere, very sincere, one in a hundred, transmitted thousands of miles, and thousands of miles away. It finally got into your phone and brought my deep affection to you - Happy New Year's Day! Don’t forget, friends!
9. When buying clothes, the salesperson (said contemptuously): These clothes are very expensive. Don’t touch them if you don’t want to buy them. A certain woman: It seems like you are rich? If you have money, you won’t sell it!
10. During the Chinese New Year, Tang Monk added a small cotton robe, Wukong added a small cotton trousers, Sha Monk added a small cotton hat, Bajie, don’t just play with your little hands. Read text messages on your mobile phone, remember to buy a pair of small gloves.
11. If you laugh happily every day and live happily, your mood will improve, good luck will come, and happiness will naturally knock on the door, so the mentality is the most important. In the New Year, I will be here Text messages make you smile!
12. By God, the emperor issued an edict: In consideration of your loyalty and hard work, I will grant you the right to shop for free. How to get it: Go to a nearby mall with this text message and pick up the products you want. If he gives you everything, that's fine. If he doesn't, he'll just pick it up and run away. Admire this! Note: The final interpretation right of this text message belongs to me.
13. I make a wish on New Year’s Day: I want good luck to wash my feet, good luck to give me a pat on my back, happiness to bring me tea, good luck to pour me water, and the most beautiful one. I don’t know where to go, but I would like to wish the person reading the message a Happy New Year as dizzy as me!
14. Are you okay? I miss you... Lately I always dream of walking on that grass with you. If we still have a chance, let’s say something weakly: we are only allowed to eat grass, and we are not allowed to urinate anywhere!
15. An ugly monkey went to a dating agency to find a match, but the boss said it was very expensive. The ugly monkey said he would get a cheap one, but the boss said there was one but it was stupid. The ugly monkey said it didn’t matter, so the boss rushed. Shouting from the window → Fool, stop reading the text messages and come out for a blind date.
16. I will send a text message worth RMB 10 to any brother or sister who has a certain status in my heart and is handsome and beautiful. Tomorrow I will treat guests to a five-star hotel... and watch them eat! Please bring your own napkins to avoid drooling on your clothes. I wish everyone a happy viewing and happy drooling!
17. Life is your welfare home, relaxation is your massage room, happiness is your base camp, happiness is when you meet Uncle Benshan every day, work is when others go to work and you get paid, and surprises are mine. Text message wishing you happiness every day in the new year!
18. Yesterday, I had the honor to meet with the Supreme Master and gave me a golden elixir. Now we are also dazzled, but a terrible thing happened immediately: I saw many monsters every day. Importantly It was me who discovered that you... are a slacker.
19. I am a kind-hearted person and work in a low-key manner. New Year's Day is approaching, and I am afraid that I will not be able to squeeze into the express lane to wish you well, and I will not be able to squeeze into the crowd of people wishing you well, so I wish you a happy New Year's Day in advance!
20. I forgive you for being silent at this inappropriate moment. Apart from harassment, I may not be able to dig out any deep meaning. If you accidentally wake up, I will remind you to cover yourself with the quilt when you go back to sleep. Turn off your phone by the way!
21. I have long had a long-standing ambition to return to Jinggang Mountain. There are singing and dancing birds everywhere, and there are even monkeys climbing up the trees. Rubbing his eyes and taking a closer look, it turned out that the orangutan was dancing. Look carefully again: Brother, it’s so hard to find you, so I’m stealing food here!
22. Asking for "Miss": One day, he had three boring Chinese classes in a row, and the teacher refused to end the get out of class. Finally, Oubao couldn't help shouting: I want to "pee"! The teacher was furious: How dare you shamelessly ask for "Miss" in my class!
23. My colleague: You have so many acnes on your face that the tractor will overturn when you drive on it! Me: If the pimples on my face were as few as the hair on your head, I would be satisfied!
24. Streaking is an outdoor sport that improvises courage, speed and figure, regardless of venue or gender. This sport originated in Europe and the United States, and has produced many enthusiasts in China in recent years. Recently, boys in Hangzhou ran naked to protest the school's power outage. The photos were printed on T-shirts and sold. They are as famous as Zeng Ge, leading the new trend of streaking. A weak question: Did you run naked today?
25. If eating more fish can nourish the brain and make people smarter, then you may have to eat at least a pair of whales...
26. One day, Xiaoqiang ate too much , walked too fast again, and bumped into a girl. Xiaoqiang was about to apologize, but his stomach raised objections and he vomited. The girl looked at Xiaoqiang and asked angrily: Am I so disgusting?
27. New Year’s Day is here, and I want to give you a grapefruit, a durian, and a banana. I wish all the gods will protect you in the new year, good luck to you, durians, and a happy horizon. Always with you Banana!
28. I’m sorry, my dear friend. I originally wanted to send you a long enough and sensational holiday blessing, but I tossed and turned, stayed up all night, racked my brains, and was confused... I still I feel that my blessings to you are indescribable, so just treat me to a meal on New Year’s Day and let me talk to you!
29. It is said that there are four states of texting: venting out of feelings; sensationalizing by making a fuss; harassing by doing nothing; and sincere blessings. I am the last one. In the new year, I wish you happiness, health, peace and happiness!
30. The "new requirements" of life in 2014: new styles of clothes, fresh vegetables, trendy lovers, new houses, new ideas for blessings, may You are in a happy mood, and your happiness is new every day!
31. Distance does not matter, height does not matter, beauty or ugliness does not matter. No matter where you hide, I will rely on you to pester you. My name is happiness and my nickname is peace. Happy New Year!
32. When will the final exam be taken? When will the results be released after the exam? What are the grades for this school year? Have you found a good job? How much is the year-end bonus? Have a girlfriend? Did your mother force you to go on a blind date? Have you weighed yourself? oops. alright. Say no more. Have a happy New Year’s Day!
33. Life becomes uncomfortable without you. I hate that hateful third party for taking you away. Do you have a new relationship with him? I really want you to come back to me - wallet.
34. I generally don’t send text messages to people easily. The person who receives my text message must be someone who is in trouble or suffering from each other, so I kowtow three times and say long live my life three times. ! It’s the New Year, I wish you a Happy New Year, nothing else, I just miss you, please step aside! Super Hilarious Jokes 2
1. He likes to eat in class. On this day, the teacher asked him: "Why do you always like to eat in class?" Xiao Ming replied: "The teacher is in class, no one is grabbing it. "Teacher: Go home and eat, no one will grab it.
2. An assignment was assigned, asking students to bring something from home to school to make the school as warm as home. The next day, some students brought potted plants to put on the table, some brought game consoles to play, and some brought snacks to eat. Xiao Ming wore pajamas and entered the classroom.
3. We had a quarrel, so my wife and I slept in separate beds. When I woke up this morning, my wife suddenly said to me: Husband, I want to travel. I asked him where he wanted to go, and he actually said: A day trip in bed with my husband.
4. Woman, come over and sleep with me for a while! "I don't have time, I'm watching TV!" Go to sleep by yourself! "Daughter-in-law, do you know how many people wanted to sleep with me, but I ruthlessly rejected them all!" "Why?" "Because the price they charge is too high!" "
5. The girl always imitates the way adults speak recently. She says whatever you say. Today I teased her: You are so cute! She said: You are so cute. I said: You are a little bad guy. Her Said: You are a little bad guy. Me: My aunt is so beautiful! She: Bah!
6. My son yelled in the bathroom early in the morning: "Bring me in my air purification equipment." Son: "Okay." After saying that, Dian Dian handed over the cigarettes.
7. I was caught smoking in the bathroom. My mother angrily picked up her belt and beat her while cursing: "Where did you get the cigarette? I asked you to smoke it for me. I asked you to smoke it for me." Dad also said Angrily, he picked up a feather duster and beat him while cursing: "Where did you get the cigarette? I told you not to smoke it for me. I told you not to smoke it for me."
8. Shopping in the market, there is something for sale on the way back. The little rabbit came over to take a look. Two little girls asked the rabbit seller: Can this rabbit be raised? The rabbit seller said: When you raise the rabbit, bring it back to me and I will replace it with a smaller one for you! It sounded quite unreasonable to me, and before I could react, I heard the girl who just asked the question say: Can I give you something to live with if I die? !
9. Two male colleagues were quarreling and about to start a fight... Suddenly the thin one said: "Who is afraid of whom? In the worst case, I will go to the hospital and you to the police station." Suddenly we couldn't help laughing. .
10. On the first day, the teacher wrote the word "嬲" on the blackboard and asked what to read? Suddenly my deskmate shouted: 3P! The whole audience was stunned...
11. I would rather cry in the study room than laugh in the dormitory. Our purpose is: to make others flustered and unable to learn!
12. The first time we had sex was with our English teacher. In junior high school, she was very beautiful. I just graduated from college and am young and energetic. She introduced herself on the podium, and our class burst into applause.