One day, Ji Xiaolan (a great scholar in Qing Dynasty) accompanied Emperor Qianlong to visit the Great Buddha Temple. The monarch and ministers came to the king's hall, but they saw a potbellied Maitreya in the middle of the hall, his chest was bare, and he was watching them laugh. Qianlong asked, "Why does this Buddha laugh at me?"
Ji Xiaolan calmly replied: "This Put Lolerk smiled at the Buddha."
Gan Long asked, "How do you say this?"
Ji Xiaolan said: "The Holy One is the reincarnation of Manjusri Bodhisattva, the living Buddha today. Now he comes to the Buddhist temple to worship Buddha, so it is said that Buddha smiles when he sees Buddha."
Qianlong secretly approved it and turned to leave. Suddenly, he saw Maitreya, a big-bellied Buddha, smiling at Ji Xiaolan. He turned and asked, "Why does the Buddha see the smile clearly?"
Ji Xiaolan said, "Your Majesty, a Buddha smiles at a minister, but a smiling minister cannot become a Buddha."
Gan Long praised Ji Xiaolan's eloquence.
Article 2: Ji Xiaolan's blind date
Ji Xiaolan is knowledgeable, witty and humorous. Anecdotes about college students still shine brightly today, and talented blind date is one of them.
His father Ji is very strict with his young age. He told Ji Xiaolan, who has always been romantic, that if you failed in the exam, I wouldn't marry you. Ji Xiaolan dark music, just take an examination of scholar, easy to handle. Ji Xiaolan was talented, and with a little effort, he was admitted to a scholar at the age of 17, when he was very prestigious in the village. Ji Rongshu had to keep his promise. As soon as the news came out, he came to Jifu to propose a long queue. I didn't expect what I promised, so I was very angry and asked. Who do you think you are, such a scholar is arrogant as soon as he is admitted? So many talented women don't deserve a little scholar like you? Ji Xiaolan said that since my father allowed me to marry a teenager, please respect my wishes. My son has long heard that the second young lady of Dongguang Horse is both talented and beautiful. How many rich children came to propose marriage were blocked by Miss Ma's examination questions, so I wanted to try my luck in Ma's house. JiRongShu smoothed her beard and said with a smile, your boy has a good eye. He has a crush on Miss Magar, a famous Dongguang family. He is ambitious!
Ji Gai prepared several carriage gifts and sent his younger brother Ji Rongxun to Dongguang Ma's house to propose marriage.
Ji Xiaolan's uncle crossed the Wangmang River and saw a blue brick house in the distance, which was spectacular in the sunset. Ask the tour guide, that's Dongguang Ma Fu.
Ma has heard that he is a child prodigy in Cangxian County, so he showed great enthusiasm for his uncle's visit. When he met Ji Xiaolan, he found that the paradise in Ji Xiaolan was so full and charming, so he decided to get married. When Miss Ma heard that the gifted scholar of Jida also came to propose marriage, she was elated and happy for a while. Miss Ma thought, is this Ji Xiaolan a real talent or a hollow reputation? I want to learn something today. So, the horse ordered to bring pen, ink, paper and ink. In a short time, he wrote down the first part of the couplet, expressing his own ideas: dry gossip, Kun gossip, 8864 hexagrams, and Ji Xiaolan can do the second part after the hexagrams are calculated. Ji Xiaolan saw Miss Ma's outstanding performance and her shaken heart through her handsome small letters, so Ji Xiaolan paced a few steps like Cao Zijian's seven-step poem, holding a pen and paper: nine sounds of love, nine sounds of phoenix, nine sounds of 981, and the couple sang. Ji Xiaolan's bottom line is not only neat, but also implicitly expresses his love for Miss Ma, and his beautiful wish to grow old with Miss Ma in Qi Mei.
Ji Xiaolan achieved good results in the first round of exams, and Teacher Ma was very happy. Then she took out the trump card that puzzled many suitors-rearranging 48 words!
These 48 words are: playing the piano in the Mid-Autumn Festival, reciting ancient poems, not smelling bells and drums, and the prime minister of the ancient temple, Ji Jishi, knows that the stars move and the immortals return to the Peach Blossom Cave to play chess with the immortals. Teacher Ma asked Ji Xiaolan to rewrite these 48 words. If she can read fluently, she will be qualified. Ji Xiaolan thought about four words and one sentence, but he couldn't understand the second sentence, five words and one sentence. Not only could he not understand the sentence, but he couldn't understand the rest of the words. Seven words and one sentence were not enough. After Ji Xiaolan hit a wall several times, he couldn't help blaming himself. How can a talented girl like Miss Ma play cards according to her habitual thinking? There must be a mystery in this. From a different perspective, she suddenly became a girl.
Thus, the great scholars who discovered the New World read in a clear voice: Mid-Autumn Festival is a good season in August, and ancient poems are recited on the piano under the moon. If you don't smell the bells and drums in the temple, you will know that the stars are moving deeper. How many immortals return to the ancient temple, and the prime minister in the temple is full of luck. When will I go back to Taoyuan Cave to play chess with the immortals?
Miss Ma, whose mind has been deciphered, has nothing to say. She walked out of the boudoir happily and met Ji Xiaolan's uncle. A beautiful story has been made by a perfect match.
Chapter three: Ji Xiaolan's humorous stories.
One noon, six-year-old Ji Xiaolan was playing in his yard.
His father came to ask him to go to school and ask his brother to come back for lunch.
Ji Xiaolan agreed, skipped to school, pushed the door and went in. I saw my brother standing in front of Mr. Wang with his head down and his hands down.
He shouted, "Brother, go home for lunch."
The younger brother raised his head slightly, said nothing, and then lowered his head.
Seeing his brother motionless, Ji Xiaolan ran to him and tried to pull him home.
Mr. Wang stopped: "Wait, your brother is being punished!" "
Ji Xiaolan opened his eyes wide and asked, "Why?"
Mr. Wang said, "I contacted him online and told him it was right. He did wrong, so he was punished. "
Ji Xiaolan blinked: "Ah! I see! Sir, can I match it for my brother? "
Seeing that Ji Xiaolan is only a child of five or six years old, Mr. Wang smiled and readily agreed, "OK, but if it doesn't match, you will be punished."
Ji Xiaolan said, "OK, you go out first!"
When Mr. Wang saw that he really thought it right, he seriously thought about it and said the first couplet: "Weedy straw mats cover reeds."
At this time, it was getting late. Farmers working in the fields went home in droves. A farmer walked past the door with a whip.
When Ji Xiaolan found this scene, he cocked his head and looked up, and immediately got a wonderful sentence, so the clear voice replied: "Cowhide whips cattle." .
When Mr. Wang heard this, he was shocked, nodded repeatedly and kept saying, "Good! All right! All right! You are a child prodigy for your quick reaction! " Wave his brothers home for dinner.
Chapter four: Ji Xiaolan's humorous stories.
It was one day in the early summer of a year, I borrowed books from Feng Bookstore in Beijing and returned to Cui Erzhuang. At the corner of the east of Beijing, it was blocked by a group of people. The crowd screamed, and Ji Xiaolan walked into the crowd and saw two big men blushing. One of these two men is in his thirties and the other is in his forties. There is a dustpan between them.
The man in his thirties is naked, swearing and his eyes are popping out. Men in their forties don't show weakness, with high sleeves, hands akimbo, swearing and spitting. It seems that these two people have a life-and-death posture.
Ji Xiaolan blinked his black eyes and looked around. He understood the reason for their quarrel from people's small talk: this man in his thirties is the shopkeeper in the oil mill; This man in his forties is the owner of a noodle restaurant. Their two workshops are very close, and they often borrow tools from each other. A few days ago, the oil mill lacked a dustpan, so the shopkeeper went to the flour mill to look for it. The people at the noodle restaurant said it wasn't borrowed. But today, the shopkeeper of the oil mill came to the flour mill and saw that the dustpan in the shopkeeper's hand was his own, so he wanted to come back.
As a result, they all said they were one of their own, and they didn't talk like each other, so they quarreled. There are many villagers around, but no one knows the details, and they don't say which one the sweeper belongs to, so they have to look worried and can't think of anything to persuade.
At this time, Ji Xiaolan had a well-thought-out plan, even forgetting that he was a child. Instead, he went forward to persuade him like an adult, saying: It's really wrong for you two to quarrel over a dustpan, won't it damage the harmony between the two families? Stop it! Stop it! The shopkeeper in the oil room looked at the child who was catching up and spoke. He is the son-in-law of a rich man and said to him, Master, get out of my way. This is beyond your control. Step back. Step back. So as not to hurt young master.
Unexpectedly, Ji Xiaolan did not stand back when he heard this, but put his hands on his waist and shouted, "How dare you!" ! You said it was yours, and he said it was his. I don't think what you two said is enough. We asked Bodo to speak for himself and tell him who owns it. Hearing this, everyone burst out laughing. Some people in the crowd knew that this was the fifth son of Cui Erfu, so they talked noisily. No one will come forward to stop him, thinking that this is a good show. After listening to everyone's comments, the two shopkeepers also knew who this little boy was, and they couldn't help him, so they had to let his temper come.
Ji Xiaolan put down his book and asked one of them for a shovel. People don't know what he is going to do, so they stare big eyes and don't talk to see what the little boy is doing. Ji Xiaolan buckled the dustpan on the ground, knocked at the bottom for a while with a shovel, then put down the shovel, gently moved it away, bent down to look at it on the ground, and then held out two fingers to pick it up on the ground, as if picking up something tiny. Then, Ji Xiaolan straightened up and smiled at everyone. He said: this dustpan has spoken, and the shopkeeper in the oil mill is its owner! Hearing this, the shopkeeper in the noodle shop became angry and looked like pig liver. Pointing to Ji Xiaolan, he shouted, Son, don't talk nonsense. Young people are the real masters. Ji Xiaolan spread out one hand, pointed to the other and said, Stop arguing. These sesame seeds are evidence. After that, he went to the shopkeeper in the noodle shop and held out his hand to show him the sesame seeds in his hand. You say the dustpan is yours, so you often use it to hold noodles and whole grains. But after only a few knocks, so many sesame seeds were dropped. Whose dustpan is this? Isn't this self-evident? ! The shopkeeper in the noodle restaurant can't say anything more. His face turned red and white, and he turned and squeezed out of the crowd. The shopkeeper of the oil mill praised it again and again, and the people around him also talked about it.
The inseparable quarrel ended like this. Ji Gongzi tried this case when he was only a teenager, and soon it went away. It is a legend in the countryside and Bali.
Chapter five: Ji Xiaolan's humorous stories.
At the age of 665,438+0, Emperor Qianlong of the Qing Dynasty asked Ji Yun (Ji Xiaolan), a famous genius, to be responsible for the compilation of Siku Quanshu. It was midsummer, and the hot air was blowing in the yard, like a fire, so hot that everyone was sweating and waving fans. Ji Yun is a big fat man, most afraid of hot summer. Although he keeps shaking his goose feather fan, he is still sweating like a pig. He simply braided his hair, took off his coat, and sat barefoot in several places to proofread the manuscript.