Mother died of illness, what about her daughter, Dai Xiao?
According to the traditional custom, when an old man dies, future generations should be filial? Five or seven? That is, 35 days. You can stop in Dai Xiao after May 7th, and some will not stop in Dai Xiao until the anniversary. Now people don't have this custom, but Dai Xiao usually stops after going up the mountain, and the green yarn and white yarn are burned when they are sent up the mountain. Actually, it doesn't matter. As long as you are worthy of your mother and filial to her, there won't be too many regrets after her death.
Mother died, as a daughter, Dai Xiao should be: if the father is alive, the right side is one inch shorter; If my father had died before, the right side would have been two inches shorter.
Dai Xiao cloth according to male left and female right: father died, filial piety cloth left missing an inch; Mother died, and the right side was missing an inch. If both parents die, Xiao Bu is two inches shorter. After his father died, his left side was two inches shorter; Mother died later, and the right side was missing two inches. You can't bring filial piety together, that is, filial piety can't be together to prevent heavy mourning.
Dai Xiao's custom of not wearing red clothes has continued from ancient times to the present, which is a respect for the dead. As long as you can internalize your love and sorrow for your loved ones in your heart and externalize it in your actions; Some details can be ignored.
Respecting, loving and respecting the elderly are the traditional virtues of the Chinese nation, which plays a very important role in maintaining family harmony and social harmony.
In ancient times, a whole set of funeral and memorial customs was formed. In ancient times, there was a saying in China's funeral ceremony that people should stay at home for three, five or seven days after death. The stay time always stays in even and odd numbers. This custom has continued to this day.
In ancient times, there was a system of mourning. Mourning is a constraint on the life of a dutiful son after the death of his loved one for a period of time. Only in this way can we express our condolences and thoughts for the deceased.
According to traditional customs, a baby needs to be cared for by his parents for three years after birth, and his son has to mourn for three years after his parents die.
Within three years of mourning, the dutiful son cannot live at home. Need to guard the grave for parents. Put up a shed in front of parents' graves, put on mourning clothes, and sleep on straw mats and pillow bricks to express their nostalgia for their parents.
Taboos for guarding the tomb: no going out for entertainment, no living at home, no drinking, no eating meat, no sharing, no bathing, no shaving, no changing clothes, and no posting of red couplets during the Spring Festival.
With the progress and development of society, such as haircut, dressing and bathing can no longer meet the needs of social development and can be changed. However, you can't wear red clothes for the funeral, and you can't put up red couplets for the New Year.
Is there anything special about Dai Xiao?
China people pay attention to etiquette, and Dai Xiaoren also pays attention to funerals.
According to tradition, mourning is divided into generations, which should not be wrong: white cloth? Colleagues and foreign relatives of the deceased; Linen? Children and daughter-in-law; Xuanbu? Grandson's nephew; Shallow cloth? Great-grandson; Yellow cloth? Great-grandson; Red cloth? Direct great-grandchildren (because great-grandchildren are descendants of five generations, red means laughing and mourning).
Adults wear straw hoops made of mourning cloth, children wear hat-shaped bags, men wear straw sandals and women wear cloth shoes. Filial piety balls are divided into four colors: men use their left wrists to filial piety balls, women tie them in their hair, and men are divided into four colors: white, blue, cyan and yellow, which was called "filial piety" in ancient times.
In addition to clothing, commonly known as? Filial piety? , one of the traditional etiquette. At present, there are seven popular Dai Xiao periods (the 49th period), one hundred days, one year and three years, and the shortest period is the end of the funeral (3-7 days).
Seven taboos of folk funeral:
1, avoid burial, the coffin bearer said "heavy":
During the funeral, the pallbearers should keep quiet and avoid talking about the word "heavy". If you accidentally blurt it out, it may lead to accidents, such as the coffin being heavier and more difficult to lift, or the coffin falling to the ground while moving.
2. Don't look at temple buildings, don't look at marriage, and don't touch pregnant women and babies with filial piety;
Because people generally think that people who wear mourning clothes have bad omen, they should avoid all occasions related to gods and celebrations, such as building temples, setting stoves, or weddings and wedding banquets. Otherwise, under the fierce infection of filial piety, the temple building is ineffective, or the relationship between newlyweds is not good. If undertaker comes into contact with the mother or baby, it will lead to dystocia of the mother and premature death of the baby.
3, avoid attending the funeral, and the deceased's birthday:
Because of the principle of "the meridian meets the Jin Mu", if the deceased was born in the following year, anyone born in the afternoon can attend the funeral ceremony regardless of the relatives and friends of the deceased. In addition, pregnant women and babies are also forbidden to send funerals, for fear of being infected with ominous gas.
4. Avoid the people attending the funeral and the zodiac of the deceased:
At funerals, there is usually a sign that there is a zodiac that conflicts with the zodiac of the deceased and must be avoided. Some will put a basin of water in the mourning hall to bathe the guests who come to attend the funeral to dispel the ominous atmosphere.
5. Don't cry when you die. Drop your tears on the dead:
During the funeral, relatives and friends of the deceased should remain calm. No one is allowed to cry at this time, otherwise the dead can't leave, and their souls can't ascend to heaven, so they can only stay in the funeral home. If you accidentally drop your tears on the deceased because you cry, it will make the deceased wander around the world and cannot be reincarnated.
6. Avoid burial in July:
July is regarded as a ghost month by ordinary people. At this time, the gates of hell in the underworld opened wide and many ghosts were exiled to the underworld. If you are buried in July, it may attract more ghosts, which is even worse for your family.
7. Don't cut your hair or shave during mourning:
According to folk custom, during the funeral at home, their relatives can't have their hair cut and shave. It is generally believed that this is to express extreme grief, so that it is impossible to take care of pruning. And its other purpose is to ward off evil spirits, to make yourself look different in peacetime through unkempt appearance, so that the dead can't recognize it and avoid being disturbed.