Recently, Zheng Shuang's boyfriend rolled on the hot search in Weibo, because he was called "soft rice man".
Crushing yourself more domineering response: soft rice man? No ... die-hard fans.
Netizens are also very supportive of scrolling, saying: Just be yourself.
In fact, if you ask me, Zheng Shuang's boyfriend is not soft at all.
He can be inferior to you in ability, family background and income, and even doesn't mind you raising him, but the most important thing is: you must learn to identify the "soft rice man" around you.
I saw a survey before. What kind of man do women hate most?
The first place is dirty man.
The second place is soft rice man.
In fact, many women hate that kind of soft rice man, because they think men should look like men, not rely on women to survive in this world.
The kind of man who not only cheats money and color, but also cheats feelings is really hateful.
But in real life, there are always some women who have a soft spot for "soft rice man". Let's see why "soft rice man" makes women love and hate.
How to define eating soft rice?
What is a man who eats soft rice?
They generally have three characteristics:
Looking at a woman's face and living,
Let women provide their own satisfactory material life.
There is no independent personality system.
A man who meets these three characteristics is called a soft rice man.
Our society is always biased against eating soft rice.
Many star couples are a combination of "strong women and weak men", such as Liu Haozhi from Yang Mi, Li from Faye Wong, Jason from Nana and Max Zhang from Li Xiang. ......
These men, at that time, were all crazy about diss by netizens and only ate soft rice.
They think:
If the man's family is not as good as the woman's, he is said to eat soft rice;
The man's income is not as good as the woman's, so he is eating soft rice;
The man's ability is not as good as that of the woman, so he is said to eat soft rice;
The man's reputation is not as good as that of the woman, so the man eats soft rice;
But in fact, you can't judge whether a person eats soft rice just by looking at his appearance or material.
It depends on whether this man is independent and recognizes his own value.
In fact, this is the highest state of eating soft rice! Do not believe, look.
There is a man, only 172 in height, not very handsome in appearance, born in the countryside, without a real job. Will you love such a man? Such a man, you will put him in the eye? Do you think he can fight back?
It is such an ordinary man who has gained countless wealth by sleeping with women.
He is the most famous playboy in the world: Ruby.
Ruby and his favorite Ferrari 166MM racing car.
He has slept with more than 1000 girls in his life, including Marilyn Monroe; He also married two richest women in the world at that time, and all the women who climbed into his bed were millionaires.
Playing is his interest, and picking up girls is his main job.
Everyone knows that he is not a good man, but there are still many women who want to post it backwards.
Ruby has been married five times in her life, including the daughter of a dictator, two French actresses and two rich American women.
Divorced and got several sports cars; Two B-25 bombers; A large coffee bean farm in Dominica; Two expensive racehorses; Fishing fleet; A17th century castle mansion in Paris, with millions of jewels and money.
There is no heaven if you eat soft rice like him.
But you have to pay it back sooner or later.
Outcome: Because of congenital infertility, I was childless all my life and finally died in a car accident. His life wealth was finally acquired by his 28-year-old new wife.
A playboy like this depends on others all his life. Only by relying on others can he survive in the world.
He thinks that he is nothing in the real world or in his own world.
Because his spiritual world is empty, that is to say, he has no embodiment of self-worth.
How to judge whether a man has self-worth?
He recognized himself.
He is very creative.
He has the ability to think independently.
Therefore, the self-abased soft rice man feels that he has no ability to create anything of value and can only rely on women to get money and fame.
And a real man, even if he encounters ups and downs, his spiritual world is still full. He has been struggling and pursuing what he wants.
As we all know, Ang Lee is a "soft rice man" in literary and art circles.
Ang Lee has been raised by his wife since she graduated six years ago.
During that time, I could only wait for work, watch movies and write plays every day.
At first, I would lie to myself "for my ideal". In the third year, Ang Lee was depressed, and he was no longer embarrassed to mention any ideals.
Even if I had to, I signed up for a computer course sadly. But he has been depressed, and his wife soon discovered his abnormality and saw the curriculum.
That night, she was silent.
Before going to work the next day, she told Ang Lee word for word: "Ann, remember the dream in your heart!"
At that moment, Ang Lee felt like a sudden gust of wind, and those dreams that were about to drown in a mediocre life, like the sunshine in that morning, kept shooting into his heart.
Later, his films began to win awards internationally.
At that time, my wife mentioned the past and said, "I have always believed that one good thing is enough for a person. Your good thing is to make a movie. There are so many people studying computer, and you are not the only one who is short of Ang Lee. If you want to win an Oscar, you must make sure you have a dream in your heart. "
Later, Lu Yu asked Ang Lee, "What is your greatest happiness at this stage?"
Ang Lee replied, "If my wife can smile at me, I will relax a little and feel very happy."
He went on to say, "Just because I am a father and a husband doesn't mean that I can naturally get their respect. You still have to earn their respect every day, and you have to reach a certain standard. This is one reason why I am not slacking off. "
Some people may ask: What if Ang Lee has been unsuccessful? Will his wife leave him?
In fact, even though Ang Lee has been unsuccessful, his wife still believes in his ability and talent. More importantly, Ang Lee also believes in his own value and the meaning of existence.
Why is soft rice man always liked by women?
Soft rice man has a strong ability to provide emotional value. The so-called ability to provide emotional value is actually the ability to control each other's emotions, which can make each other happy, make each other sad and become the spiritual pillar of each other.
However, some men will provide real emotional value to women, while others will provide false emotional value to women.
Soft rice men provide false emotional value to women, just like the relationship between givers and beggars. One day, you will finish all the facilities, and he is still asking for it. When you can't satisfy him, he will accuse you. Why don't you give it to me?
Being able to grasp a woman's heart and prescribe the right medicine for different women will find each other's weaknesses, so the right medicine will definitely get twice the result with half the effort.
1) If you are an inferior woman, she will sell handsome.
"With him, I feel worthy of being loved."
Women who feel inferior always don't believe in themselves. Do people really love them because of their ugly faces and imperfect bodies?
So when a particularly handsome man chases her, she will be tolerant and happy, and even if he is fine, she will still accept him.
Therefore, women who feel inferior need to learn to be confident, instead of finding a boyfriend in Shuai Shuai to pay for themselves.
2) If you are a precocious girl, she will be very cute.
"With him, I think I can be a happy child."
A precocious woman has always been asked by adults to be a little adult. She can't be spoiled and sensible. So when she met a man who could coquetry her without restraint, her heart melted. She feels so happy to be a child. It is better to take care of her own children than that man.
Therefore, a precocious woman needs to learn to put down her disguise, truly feel her happiness and coquetry, and allow her childishness.
3) If you are a good girl, she will sell cool.
"With him, I feel that life is wonderful."
There are many rules in a good girl's world, and the truth cannot be touched. She dare not break everything she has always insisted on. If this wonderful world is broken, she dare not think about it.
When a cool man appeared, she broke all her rules and behaviors. She found that the world at this time is more wonderful, more fun and more fun than before, and she is increasingly inseparable from such a man.
So, good girl, you need to break your rules. The world is not black and white, but colorful.
4) If you are an introvert, he will cheat.
"With him, my life is full of sweetness."
Introverted women are always unable to express their feelings clearly and always enjoy everything passively. It doesn't matter whether they love or not. What matters is whether that person takes the initiative to love her to the extent that she has to.
His passionate emotional pursuit and crazy emotional devotion made her feel so sweet.
Therefore, introverted women, you need to learn to actively express their feelings. Love, hate, sadness and happiness can all be expressed with your lover. Don't be afraid. They don't love you because of this. Even if you are injured, you are still the best.
5) If you are a virgin, she will sell badly.
"With him, I feel that my little heart has been taken care of."
Virgin daughters always want to save fallen men, confused men and miserable men. In fact, she didn't want to save him, but wanted to save her fragile and insignificant self.
In fact, those soft rice men are immature little boys. They can't realize the primitive accumulation of self-worth, so they will become giant babies in the female world, but they can't become kings in the male world.
And those girls who like soft rice men only see the sugar coating of love, but they don't see the shell of love.
These girls are cheated because they all have a compensation mentality for love.
Because I can't get love, I hope to find a man of this quality to love. But in the end, the man left her, and she still needed it.
What's it like to really eat soft rice?
That is, two people can face up to their wounds, weaknesses and shortcomings, nourish each other, heal each other, accept their true appearance and firmly believe that they still love you.
As we all know, Lee Hyo Ri, a sexy female singer from South Korea, boarded a hot search because of her bold words.
At that time, many media commented that the "first sexy goddess" actually married an ugly, poor and enterprising man, and she was afraid that the rest of her life would be ruined. ...
Many netizens questioned how her husband could support his family and his wife if he didn't work for a long time.
But Lee Hyo Ri said, "It doesn't matter, because I have money."
She is also rich. According to Korean media statistics, Lee Hyo Ri's assets are estimated at 30 billion won.
What about her husband, Li Shangshun?
At the age of 44, he only released one album.
His family is ordinary, his parents are elderly, and he has savings in Weibo, but he has no income all the year round.
Even so, he still has many hobbies: drinking tea, keeping dogs, playing guitar and writing music ... which one costs nothing?
However, Li Shangshun doesn't feel stressed because he has no money, because he really loves his wife.
And Lee Hyo Ri will not look down on her husband because he has no money, and even feel inferior. He thought, "My brother really doesn't eat fireworks. I only have money."
In fact, falling in love is to heal our previous wounds.
If you have been in a close relationship and haven't grown up, you will always eat sugar, but you can't take that medicine.
And those soft rice men, they are vampires of love.
If you are a 20-year-old girl cheated by them, you can cheat feelings and money, because you still have the capital to start over;
But if you are 30 years old and still cheated by such a man, then years will not give you another chance to be spoiled.
The man who really loves you, even if he eats soft rice,
Still have an independent personality,
A powerful spiritual world,
Dedicated to this world,
Have a lifelong goal,
Besides,
He can also be emotionally subdivided.
Give you a full sense of security and love.
Heart helps, not loneliness—
Ps: Don Miguel Luize said in Free Your Heart: "We need others' acceptance and love, but we can't accept ourselves or love ourselves. The more we love ourselves, the less we abuse ourselves and the more others will love you. "
Accept yourself and love yourself, and you will be accepted and cared for by others. How to accept the true self and attract the right people?
Welcome to Lu Yue's family therapy workshop, to treat the inner pain deeply.