I am a wedding host. I have been in the business for nearly 8 years. I have hosted more than 100,000 weddings. Uh, wait a minute, no, let me count. 123 ...Well, I'm sorry. During this time, I have been thinking about when my self-media articles will have more than 100,000 views, so I accidentally wrote two extra zeros. I'm sorry.
As a wedding person, it is estimated that it will be impossible in this life to expect to host more than 100,000 weddings, but #WEdding#
# WEDDING MC # #OUTDOOR Wedding # # wedding scene # # getting married strategy #
There are still some people who have hosted more than 1,000 weddings.
If you host a lot of weddings, you will encounter a lot of weird things. Today, let’s talk about things about marriage, the past and present of marriage.
First of all, let’s do some popular science: what is marriage trouble? Why did the custom of marriage quarrels arise?
Marriage trouble is an aspect of traditional Chinese marriage customs. Typical representatives include "making trouble in the bridal chamber", another example is "making trouble in the bridal chamber", and, uh, "making trouble in the bridal chamber" - the reason why I repeat it is just to illustrate one thing. The earliest wedding troubles we talked about were basically limited to Making trouble in the bridal chamber. It's just that with the development of the times, some other forms of marriage came into being. Such as making trouble with the groom, making trouble with the bride, making trouble with the best man, making trouble with the bridesmaid, making trouble with the parents, etc. Some of the behaviors are even offensive and affect the social atmosphere. What's more, the behavior of some marriage troublemakers even wanders on the edge of the law, so that the trouble is There were lawsuits, lives were lost, and so on.
Here comes the question. We all know that China has always been called a "land of etiquette."
It can be seen that China has attached great importance to etiquette since ancient times, and etiquette culture also promotes the development of Chinese civilization. So, why did the marriage custom appear, which has been controversial and criticized in later generations?
This starts with the wedding form of our nation.
In other words, weddings are a major event for Chinese inheritance and family reproduction, and we all take them very seriously. Therefore, the wedding must strictly follow a series of procedures. So, what exactly is the process to go through?
The "Book of Rites" makes it very clear, that is, accepting gifts, asking for names, accepting gifts, accepting levies, asking for appointments, and personally welcoming. What does it mean?
The translation is
Nacai: The man entrusts a matchmaker to go to the woman’s house to propose marriage. The woman agrees, and the man brings gifts to the woman’s house to propose marriage;
Asking for a name : Commonly known as, change the horoscope. The parents above the man and woman write down the names and birthdays of the two children and give them to each other, and ask the fortune teller for good or bad luck.
Najib: After the fortune teller’s divination, there was no problem. The two parties signed a marriage contract and exchanged marriage letters.
Nazheng: After the man agrees to marry the woman, he gives her a betrothal gift.
Application period: Both men and women determine the wedding date.
To welcome a bride in person: to welcome a bride, to marry a wife.
Through this process, we saw that basically nothing happened to the bride and groom from the preparation to the bride’s entrance. It is entirely the order of the parents and the words of the matchmaker. For the newlyweds, it is a blind marriage. The bride and groom have no pre-marital relationships, are not familiar with each other, and have no emotional foundation. The wedding night will inevitably be awkward and embarrassing for each other. In order to improve this situation, the custom of having a wedding ceremony was born. The purpose is to make the newlyweds feel dependent and familiar with each other through some playful games, thereby helping the bride and groom overcome the strangeness and enter the role of husband and wife more quickly.
In addition, there is another saying that Ziweixing descends to earth and instructs guests to play and laugh to drive away dirty things and unlucky monsters and ghosts in the bridal chamber, and to protect the newlyweds.
Furthermore, some places believe that the existence of marriage troubles is also related to the ancient bride-robbing system. This view is relatively niche, so I won’t go into details here.
But no matter what the reason is, the wedding custom of having a wedding ceremony was mostly an expression of goodwill by people at the beginning. This is also essentially different from the various excessive forms of marriage troubles in later generations.
The development and manifestations of modern marriage troubles
With the development of the times, marriage troubles have also "advanced with the times" and derived many new forms. In different regions, economic development Regions with different degrees will also have different manifestations. Specifically, we can look at the picture below:
In my impression, the most popular thing in the entertainment industry related to wedding troubles should be the 2016 Bao Beier's wedding, when Bao Beier, Han Geng, Wang Zulan, and Du Haitao made a fuss about the bridesmaid Liu Yan. event. Although afterwards, several parties involved expressed their opinions and apologized one after another. But as a star with a certain degree of public influence, his behavior as a bridesmaid is indeed somewhat inappropriate and has a bad impact on the public.
We will not discuss the various rights and wrongs here, but at least it can be seen that the phenomenon of marriage troubles is still very popular in the hearts of a considerable number of people.
If celebrities are like this, it is natural for ordinary people to be like this. As a wedding host who has been working as a wedding host for 8 years, of course, I cannot avoid encountering all kinds of weird wedding incidents during my many years of wedding hosting career. Let’s take a look at them one by one.
Trouble with the groom
It should be three or four years ago that he often went to Ruyang area to host weddings. Usually in the process of accepting a bride, (previously in my other article "Pre-wedding preparations, do these 3 points, it will be difficult for your wedding to go smoothly", I talked about some basic procedures of the bride-to-be. If you are interested, you can check it out , link at the end of the article) After the groom takes the bride back to the new house, and after the necessary ceremony is completed, most family members will tacitly avoid it temporarily. The groom's group of friends started clearing out the new house. Ladies, please stay away. The bride and her besties can go to the hotel first.
Then, in the new house, a few buddies took off the groom’s clothes. Of course, they usually left his underwear on. They had different ways of playing. In my impression, the most outrageous one was when a few brothers , took the candle, scissors... Okay, omit 500 words here.
In the end, if it weren’t for the fact that they couldn’t delay the ceremony at noon, the buddies would have given up without finishing their thoughts. In short, that time was an eye-opener. After careful consideration of the video taken on my mobile phone, I felt that the scale was too large. To avoid unnecessary trouble, I did not dare to upload it to the Internet, and finally deleted it.
Some friends may have a strong sense of justice and ask: What does your host do for food? Since you are also present and still have time to record a short video, why not stop it? !
Yeah, too. Okay, let’s use Baidu’s slogan: Moments, take a screenshot and you’ll know
That’s the situation. Under the circumstances, the groom’s brothers were having fun, and they didn’t recognize them. Although I’m not familiar with you, but the host still didn’t discuss it! ! Of course, the scale will definitely be a little smaller...
Some netizens will say, even so, you should stick to your principles? ! How could...
Okay, brother. You're right, I worship you, come on, do this job...
——This can be regarded as making trouble for the host.
The bride is making trouble
To be honest, I have hosted so many weddings and not many sincere ones have come across. At least not many in Henan. I think the reason is easy to understand. As the groom's brothers, it's OK to joke with yourself, but it's a bit unreasonable to provoke your sister-in-law.
At most, before the bride receives her new house, gets off the car, and prays to heaven and earth, there is a saying in some areas that grains and beans are scattered, which means "to drive away three evil spirits" (what are the "three evil spirits"? Black-bone chicken, green ox, and green sheep ), how to do it? Take a pot of grains and throw them on the bride to bring blessings and drive away evil spirits. (When it comes to folk customs, I will write a special article next time to introduce it.) Some people will go a little overboard here and add some seasonings, flour, etc. to the grains. No need to go into details.
Of course, in areas other than Henan, there is a related bad custom of making trouble for brides. For example, in the video that went viral on WeChat Moments some time ago, the father-in-law forcefully kissed his daughter-in-law at a hotel in Yancheng, Jiangsu Province. This is a typical example of immorality and has seriously affected social morality. This incident naturally triggered unanimous condemnation from netizens online.
Bridesmaid trouble
This can be said to be the hardest hit area of ??wedding troubles in the past two years. This can be seen in the incident of the bridesmaid making trouble at Bao Beier's wedding mentioned above.
When it comes to having bridesmaids, we can’t avoid talking about the Ruyang area (of course it has improved a lot in recent years). In recent years, there have been very few people going to Ruyang to host weddings. I only go there once in a while, and there are basically very few bridesmaids. Yes, that is, during the wedding process, the bride and groom are not assigned a bridesmaid - no one wants to be a bridesmaid. Bridesmaids became a high-risk profession. I even often see requests for renting bridesmaids in Moments and WeChat groups.
Bridesmaid trouble usually occurs at the bride’s house. After the groom and his brothers knock on the door of the bride’s boudoir, especially when looking for shoes, it is easy to push and pull, and some unruly people will touch and scratch. of. Of course, the "Shandong Tai'an molestation of a bridesmaid" incident disclosed on the Internet was not just a simple marriage dispute. It had seriously escalated into a civil or even criminal case. Later, several of the parties involved received "dividends" and were sentenced to 1 to 3 years in prison. The prison sentence is also brought by one's own fault, which is very satisfying.
Trouble with parents
It often occurs in some economically underdeveloped areas and some areas with special customs. Common forms of trouble include using shoe polish to paint the faces of the father-in-law and the mother-in-law with colors and patterns, making the groom’s parents wear fancy clothes and parade them through the streets, or forcing the parents and daughter-in-law to do some unethical sexual acts. Cue behavior, and so on. My biggest feeling about this is that this is clearly an act of evil in the name of custom. Extremely vulgar and disgusting.
As for the evaluation of marriage troubles, the famous director Ang Lee’s evaluation can be said to be spot-on, “This phenomenon is a concentrated explosion of sexual repression in China for five thousand years.” The so-called marriage troubles at this stage are actually disguised indecency and sexual assault. The so-called traditional Chinese culture to cover up shame would be inappropriate.
As practitioners in the wedding industry, of course we must first strongly resist bad habits and bad customs, and provide positive guidance and publicity for good wedding customs; as the parties, the bride and groom should clearly inform the relevant parties of participating in the wedding. Relatives and friends, refuse marriage troubles and say no to marriage troubles!
With the improvement of people's material and cultural living standards in recent years, coupled with the constraints of relevant government departments and the promulgation of relevant laws, regulations and policies, the phenomenon of wedding troubles has become less and less, and weddings are gradually returning In essence, Chinese-style weddings, Western-style weddings, lawn weddings, overseas destination weddings, etc. are either solemn and solemn and filled with a sense of ceremony, or relaxed and full of happiness.
As practitioners in the wedding industry, we bear the responsibility and obligation to carry forward and inherit traditional Chinese wedding customs and culture. We also sincerely hope that this industry can develop healthily and soundly.