Wenzhou’s traditional wedding customs roughly follow the six rites from matchmaking, opening and closing, negotiation, small and large weddings to consummation, but are more complicated than the six rites. Especially after the wedding is over, the wedding continues and only lasts for a week. The so-called wedding ceremony takes seven days and the wedding ceremony lasts eight days. Now let’s share some information about Wenzhou’s wedding customs. And specifically stated that we are not opposed to imitation.
Pre-wedding etiquette:
Matchmaker: As the saying goes, if there are no clouds in the sky, it will be difficult to make rain, and if there is no matchmaker in the world, it will be impossible to get married. Marriage in the old days required a matchmaker. Men and women are not allowed to give or receive privately. The job of the matchmaker is to introduce the man and woman to each other back-to-back. According to the matchmaker, the men must be strong and have good family backgrounds, and the women must be as beautiful as flowers, quiet and virtuous. When both parties are satisfied with each other, the matchmaker participates in the negotiation of the betrothal gift. Then he acts as a messenger for the engaged man and woman until they get married. The man pays the matchmaker a pig's head, and the woman settles the matter with a piece of sponge cake.
Integrated marriage: The fact that both men and women prefer each other does not count, God’s will is the most important. God's meaning is usually known through marriage or direct "asking the Buddha". In order to get married, the age of the parties involved is calculated by a fortune teller to see if there are any conflicts. If there is a conflict, you cannot get married. "Ask the Buddha' means to ask for a sign in front of the Buddha. There is also a simple way, that is, press the opponent's Year Geng paper under the Kitchen God's incense burner for seven days. During this period, if there are no broken dishes or family quarrels or other unlucky things, it will be OK. < /p>
Discussing the betrothal: After the god has married, he begins to negotiate the bride price and dowry, which can be as detailed as the number of rice dumplings (ten per load), the number of washbasins, etc. The two parties may fight for these. Blushing, no one else thinks it's strange.
After everything is settled, a small settlement is made, that is, part of the agreed betrothal gift is paid to the woman first, which is equivalent to the down payment in the current business. In other words, the man has more initiative. He can use the harvest as an excuse to eat sweets first, and a few dozen yuan is enough. However, if it is too shameful or the woman is in financial difficulty, she will force some money before the wedding. , such as wool, wool, cash, etc.
Dading: On a good auspicious day after the harvest or before the wedding, the atmosphere is much more lively than Xiaoding. p> At this time, the betrothal gift must be paid in full, mainly watches, the highest-end one is the Shanghai brand of 120 yuan. If Dading Fashion cannot honor the originally agreed betrothal gift, it is dangerous at this time, and the incomplete betrothal gift may be thrown out of the door. Maybe, but it doesn't matter, it doesn't really matter. As long as you say more good things and promise to make up for it, the woman will still accept it after you pick it up. It's best to use a square set to hold the gifts, and you can use new ones for the rest. Luo Jing, if you can't borrow Fang Sheng, you can use six boxes instead (discussed below)
Sending date: that is, after the date of marriage, the wife is basically on her own. Yes, you have the right to discuss marriage matters with the woman. If you have no intention of getting married for a long time after your marriage, the main reason is that Brother Kong Fang does not agree. At this time, the woman will not think that you are poor and will only force you to get married as soon as possible. My husband's family is not rich either, so I can't let my wife stay at his family's house for free, right? So, you choose an auspicious day (it will definitely not be the first or fifteenth day of the lunar calendar) and ask someone to write it in red with calligraphy. Paper, put in six boxes and sent to the woman. Also placed in the six boxes are crucian carp, pork, pork belly, live chicken, longan, Huaha *** Six kinds of gifts, called six kinds. p>
The six items can be slightly changed, such as replacing the pork belly with pork liver, or replacing the liver belly with longan.
Top: Give it a few days before the official wedding. The woman mainly gives gifts of pork, which usually weighs about 200 kilograms, and at least 150 kilograms. The woman receives so much pork to share with relatives and serve as a gift. How much is the focus of the negotiation.
Carrying the dowry: One day before the wedding or on the morning of the wedding, the man sends a young relative and a little boy to the woman to transport the dowry. The woman’s dowry has been laid out by the tailor. They gathered in the upper room (middle hall), tied with red silk ribbons and tied with evergreen branches and cypress leaves. The red "Double Happiness" sign was posted on the logs. The little boy came to carry the urine tray, and there was a red envelope in the urine tray. Usually it was 5 cents to 1 yuan, but later it went up to 2 yuan, and I lost my share. Carrying the urine tray is a good job, usually for the groom's close relatives, so that the wealth does not go to outsiders.
Crying at the wedding: On the wedding day, the bride will cry. If you really can't cry, you have to make your eyes red to avoid gossip. Otherwise, she is "big-hearted" (pronounced in Wenzhou dialect), and her mother is the first person to be unhappy. She thinks that her daughter has no attachment to her and has long wanted to fly. When the author's sister got married, she just smiled curiously, while my mother couldn't keep it off her face and made some serious noises on the stove. The aunt who knew this secretly pulled her sister's clothes and gently urged her to cry.
If the bride cries, some of the female guests will stop her, some will cry with her, and some will stop her while crying. The man walked away knowingly and said "you have fun" and "you have fun" (which means it should be). It is said that brides from Yueqing cry the most, while brides from Pingyang cry the most gracefully. Pingyang brides cry and sing at the same time. They sing rhyming words to the tune of drum lyrics. The content is about bidding farewell to relatives, mainly mothers, telling the ugliness of secular marriage, lamenting the fate of beauties, etc.
Welcoming the bride and getting on the sedan chair (or getting off the boat): Welcoming the bride can be divided into the five-night gate and the dusk gate. In the early days, it was mainly the bride who came to the door at the fifth watch, probably because the time was not objective. Later, it was basically lunch. Then set off to take the bride back for dinner. Lunch is called a banquet, and dinner is called a banquet. The food for the banquet is relatively simple, the main thing is to make fun of it, not to eat. There is a proverb: When people in Tangjiaqiao have a feast, they bring their own wine glasses and chopsticks.
On the day of the wedding, the bride basically does not eat food after getting up, especially does not drink water. Just eat something before departure, mainly longan. Only women know the secret, men don't ask. I can tell you why you eat less and drink less. This is because you are afraid of having to eat and drink too much and go to the toilet inconveniently. People in the old days were not very civilized and often took pride in making the bride wet her pants. As for the soup on the sedan chair, it’s just a symbolic bite. In front of so many guests, how can you still eat it when you’re nervous?
The bride wore a beaded crown and a python robe before and after liberation. During the Cultural Revolution, she only wore ordinary new clothes. When the bride stepped onto the threshold of the groom's house, the red rain was like a rock, and the bridesmaids who had been prepared held up the rice sifter and shouted to block it, while the rice scatterers smiled happily. Then the wedding reached its climax.
Now that the bride has been married to you, it is your own business to manage family production and construction.