Give me a woman and I can create an orc.
I allow you to walk into my world, but I don't allow you to walk around in my world.
4. I saw a car on the road, and there were six words on the back: I was in a hurry to fly over.
It was very cold, so I sent you a coat. The post office said it was too heavy, so I hinged the buttons and put them in my pocket.
6. The world belongs to us and our children, but ultimately to our grandchildren!
7. Say the scriptures 300 times a day, and money and beautiful women will be recorded!
8. You put bricks on the toilet, and you lift yourself too high.
9. One day, the phone was walking on the road and suddenly hung up!
10. A man gives a woman a bra to show that he wants to establish a lover relationship; A woman gives a man underwear, which means there is a lover relationship.
1 1. Women are kind because they are stupid, and men are stupid because they are kind.
12. Specifically, people say that you are immature; Be careful, people say you are an animal. Fortunately, I am neither. I'm crazy.
13. Happiness is a virus. I am the source of the virus, infecting you and the whole world.
14. Women demand generosity and gentleness in two extreme ways: naive girls and hysteria.
15. Life should be as carefree as dementia; Dare to think and do like schizophrenia; Happy as crazy; Like a paranoid, fearless.
16. ferment pain with your mood and make happy steamed bread!
17. I'm going to cry. I'm going to make trouble. I stayed up all night, holding a bottle of sleeping pills and hanging myself with a small rope.
18. Once you slip, you become a big cripple, and then turn around and flash your back.
19. One day in the sky and one year on the ground; Eating a cigarette in the sky is seven or eight days on earth.
20. Aunt,/kloc-See you at heartbroken cliff in 0/6 years. Don't forget to send me a message then!
2 1. I was sad for several days when I saw your smile; I'm happy to see you cry for years.
22. If youth is spent doing nothing, it will be a sad tragedy to recall the years.
23. When I close my eyes, I seem to see my future.
24. pants lose their belts before they know what dependence is.
Please don't take my tolerance for you as your cheap capital.
26. Why is kindness always associated with stupidity? Why are the cunning always the bad guys? I am kind and cunning. Is it an exception?
27. Don't hint at me, I know darkrooms lie.
28. Boys' love is like a piece of pie, piece by piece; Girls' love is like wind chimes, which come and go.
29. Don't bother me. If not, take off your underwear, take out the rubber band and make a slingshot to hit your glass.
30. Travel to Mars. Please tap the monitor three times. I will give you an answer as soon as possible.
3 1. You believe what I said, your IQ is low!
32. My pure moment is better than the lies of your life.
33. What is love? Love is either lust, caution or diamond ring.
34. Simplicity is the best whether it is lace underwear or work report.
35. Clubs are college students' favorite clubs, because everyone wants to be a shooter.
36. Will bad things happen when men and women share a room? Like someone farted.
37. Don't forget your identity as a sheep dancing with wolves.
38. If you want good skin, cook and fry every day.
39. Time is a river, and people often drown.
40. I never write words, but I write ordinary people.
4 1. If you don't fall asleep in class, you will get drunk on the wine table.
42. Youth is dedicated to the house and middle age to the children.
44. People's sorrow is not inferior to dogs, but they think they are much better than dogs!
45. Life is death!
46. I am a little bee, and I am busy picking flowers all day.
47. Dad: You are so old, it's time to find a wife. Me: Yes, but there are so many people. Whose wife am I looking for?
48. Only when you are dirty will you feel that others are as dirty as him.
49. I can't eat the food I miss you, because I can't eat the food when I miss you!
50. Doing one's best is malicious dumping, and refusing to get married is local protectionism.
5 1. keeps saying that customers are God, and these businesses are not Christians at all!
52. If people don't commit crimes against me, I won't commit crimes; If people offend me, comity three points; If people force me again, I'll give you an injection; People still attack me and kill the grass.
I am convinced that someone will come to this world because of my pain.
As a monster, my wish is to destroy at least one Altman.
Emotional phrases dedicated to crazy youth
1, I want to be your heart in my next life, at least I will die if I don't jump.
2, the exam, ready to write "Baidu once, you will know" on the paper, which makes the marking teacher very angry.
3. I have been poor and crazy recently, and I have no money to buy big cakes, so I can only eat buns; If you want to eat pie, pat the steamed bread flat; If you want to eat noodles, comb the steamed bread with a comb a few times!
The saddest thing is not that men are fake, but that women are stupid.
5. Is there anyone like me who wants to go to school during the holidays and have a holiday when he goes to school?
If I remember you in my next life, I will never be with you again.
7. I never tidy my room because I am a beautiful woman in a messy room.
8. Marriage trilogy: In the first year, men are talking and women are listening; The next year, women were talking and men were listening. In the third year, men and women talked together and neighbors listened.
9. My computer is old and pure. When it comes to colored topics, you can't stand the black screen.
10, book me two tickets to heaven. I'm going to find Yue Lao.
1 1. Youth is like toilet paper. It looks a lot, but it's not enough.
12, brother's goal: peasant woman, mountain spring, little field.
13, space spoof: My friend's name in his girlfriend's mobile phone is "he", and then they broke up and became "it" …
14, don't call me if you have nothing to do, let alone something!
15, the sky is gray and the night is boundless.
16, Life: Class is over … School is over … Vacation … Graduation … Enough mixing … Old … Regret … Dead.
17, youth is rushing, and then it falls down beautifully.
18, in fact, we can boil all the problems down to two kinds: one is that we are hungry and have no food; One is full.
19, after studying for more than ten years, I think kindergarten is better.
Don't do anything wrong and pour all the dirty water on yourself. I have to flush the toilet.
2 1, the great thing about news broadcast is that even if you keep changing channels, you can watch a piece of news completely.
22. I'm not your little raccoon. It's fun to play without you.
23. You don't need too many close friends. Two are enough. One will lend you money and the other will attend your funeral.
I devoted my most perfect years to compulsory education.
1, it is said that women are made of water, but recently the water pollution is so serious.
People inside the wall want to come out, people outside the wall want to go in, and I stand on the wall and watch.
3, benefactor, put down the butcher's knife and set the Buddha to shave his head.
You can only convince others' ears with your mouth, but you can conquer others' hearts with your actions.
5. Live in the coldest water and try not to drown.
Hey, don't put your useless face in front of me. Thank you.
7. You are dressed like this. Are you dissatisfied with the world?
8. I made so many mistakes that I don't know where I made them now.
9. Don't miss some crooked melons and cracked dates. How do you know what is best?
10, every time I think of you, you are a grain of sand, so there is Sahara in the world.
1 1, you are not Lin Daiyu, don't play sad like others.
12, jokes are actually hot and cold. Who doesn't know humor?
13, the only thing I can put down at this age is chopsticks.
14. What is money? Something I don't have.
15, if the heart is not like the sea, how can there be a career like the sea?
16, one heart can only hold one person. If you hold two people, then you are not alone.
17, what is crazier than love-lovelorn.
18, don't be afraid of temptation, you resisted, which means you are a good person; The failure of the boycott shows that you are a good person.
19, don't rob me. Although I can't be coquettish, I can wrestle.
20. I dedicated my most perfect years to compulsory education.
2 1, women have two mouths, one is right and wrong, and the other is cannibal.
22. Being stared at by a beautiful woman needs more psychological quality than being watched by an ugly woman for a day.
23. Beauty can only be used to deceive men, and cleverness can be used to deceive the world.
You say you are my friend, but in fact, I know that animals are indeed friends of human beings.
25. Be careful when brushing your teeth in the future, and don't swallow mouthwash.
26. Speaking is not necessarily better than singing. But singing must be worse than talking.
Dedicated to the teacher
1. Spreading knowledge means sowing hope and happiness. Teacher, you are the sower of this hope and happiness!
2. Teacher's Day is coming. Let us bless you silently. ...
3. Teacher, your love is as warm as fire, as warm as spring breeze, and as sweet as spring; Teacher, your love is more severe than father's love, more delicate than maternal love, and purer than friendship. The dark clouds will disperse and the lights will go out, but your love is like a vast universe, which will never disappear.
On this holiday season, I sincerely wish you good health, good luck and eternal youth!
5, teacher, everyone says that you are cultivating the pillars of the motherland; I want to say that you are the pillars of the motherland. You have propped up the backbone of our generation!
6. You are like a red candle, giving all the heat and light to the younger generation! Your character and spirit can be summed up in two words-burning! Keep burning!
7, teacher, just a few days together let us really know you, your kind and simple words; Numbers approved on the desk; Silent and selfless dedication echoes around us all the time. You are a red candle, light yourself and illuminate us; You are a silkworm, and you are exhausted to death. You are a raindrop, nourishing us to grow sturdily. You watered our ideal flowers with the nectar of knowledge, you nourished the beautiful fruit of our sentiment with the clear spring of mind, and you …… teacher, you released the hope of love and harvested the brilliant sunshine. Dear teacher, in this unusual festival, send our deepest and most sincere blessing: "May you have a healthy, happy and happy day!" " Just say, "Teacher, you have worked hard!" "
8. We are like budding spring buds. You water and fertilize us with love, and let us blossom beautiful flowers.
9. Flowers know the selflessness of spring rain best; The moon understands the generosity of sunshine best. The teacher's love, in just a few days, we have experienced incisively and vividly: kind love, strict love, full of expectation and care!
10, you are busy for the blooming of flowers and the maturity of fruits, silently hanging the shade of leaves! Ah, teacher, your spirit, always remember my heart!
1 1, teacher, send me a sincere blessing during the festival, wishing you a healthier, happier and happier future! Miss a season of flowers, is my infinite congratulations, full of flowers, is that you have beautiful youth, there is always constant laughter, countless missing strings of eternal blessings to you! On the journey of life, it is you who light the light of hope for me, enrich my soul, increase my wisdom, teach me, educate me and love me. I will always be grateful to you and bless you! How high the sky is, how high your thoughts are, how deep the mountains are, and how deep your kindness is!
12, you are the beacon of our life and the key to our wisdom. It is you who have given us knowledge and made our life no longer blank.
13. Without the nourishment of your thoughts, how could so many beautiful flowers of the soul bloom? Ah, teacher, engineer of human soul, who is not praising you!
14, you are the best teacher, you are the best friend!
15, in class, you took pains to teach us; After class, you play with us.
16, when the seedling needs a glass of water, never send a bucket of water; And when you need a bucket of water, never give a glass of water. Giving in time and in moderation is a good gardener's skill. My teacher, this is your art of education.
17 teacher, do you know? I have a few heartfelt words, but I have gradually adapted to junior high school life. However, the tense rhythm still makes people nervous, and the daily classes are very tense. It's like reading an English sentence and then starting to write. You can't write a few words before you start to calculate math problems. The heavy schoolbag has become a burden, bearing parents' expectations and teachers' exhortations. Although there is not much homework, every teacher's requirements are very high, which makes me a little breathless.
18 teacher, you are a cultivator and a sower of beauty. It is you, shining with beautiful sunshine, nourishing beautiful rain and dew, making our hearts green and full of flowers!
19. In the near future, whether I become a tall and straight tree or a low shrub, I will pay tribute to you with the green of life. Dear teacher, I would like to weave my thoughts into a basket for you!
20. Hello, teacher. Stepping into the campus, I am gradually growing and changing under your careful care. From fledgling chicks to eagles ready to go, thank you sincerely.
2 1, maybe junior high school life should be like this, you have to bear these hopes. It's difficult, but don't worry, teacher, I'll try my best.
22. Ah, with you, the garden is so gorgeous and the earth is full of spring! Teacher, please open the window and have a look. All this love and this garden full of peaches and plums are paying tribute to you!