1. If you like someone, just confess it. If you don’t get rejected, you will really think that you are a pure and beautiful little fairy.
2. Life is already so difficult. If you keep showing off, I will kill you.
3. If you have two boats, the boat will capsize sooner or later. Even if you step on thousands of boats, they will never be able to capsize.
4. Nai Qiaodong, that bowl of Meng Po soup broke the lives of many people forever.
5. Short people don’t like Jay Chou, because his first sentence is always: Ouch!
6. I fought with the mosquito all night yesterday and ended up in a draw. It didn’t eat enough and I didn’t sleep well.
7. Arrogant people can be saved, but people with low self-esteem cannot be saved. I think I can still save it!
8. If a man doesn’t have the ability, don’t say that a woman is too realistic. If a woman doesn’t have the ability, don’t say that a man is too carefree.
9. Some people say that I am shameless. This is nonsense. My face is so beautiful, how can I bear to give it up?
10. When people call me girl, I say the same thing when they call me aunt, because mother and mother mean the same thing.
11. Late at night, the mobile phone becomes very strange, exuding the smell of barbecue and milk tea.
12. The most useless thing in the world is the salary slip. If you look at it, you will get angry and wipe your butt too thinly.
13. You must be scolding me because you don’t understand me, because everyone who knows me wants to hit me.
14. Please pay attention to the foodies around you, they may die if you are not careful.
15. After checking the balance in Alipay, my hanging heart finally stopped beating.
16. If life deceives you, don’t worry, take out the beauty camera and deceive life.
17. No one is perfect. Long-term partners accept flaws and learn to cherish each other.
18. Let me test your math skills. What is your phone number?
19. I heard that eating fast food is bad for my health, so I quickly ordered a takeaway and asked the takeaway guy to deliver it slowly.
20. They say silence is golden. I have been silent for so long, but why haven’t I seen gold?
21. I asked Buddha: Is there true love in this world? Buddha said: If so, would I still become a monk?
22. When I post on Moments, I usually block my family members, for no other reason than that I’m afraid they won’t recognize me.
23. Later, Xiao Ming no longer appeared in the high school textbooks, so I knew that fool would not be admitted to high school.
24. If I had known that today’s world is about appearance, I should have used the money from school to have plastic surgery.
25. Jingle Cat lives in darkness forever because it cannot see its fingers.
26. Some people say that my TikTok is not nutritious. What? Are you making bone soup on Douyin?
27. The most nonsense sentence in human beings is what is said on the cigarette box, smoking is harmful to health.
28. Don’t worry or panic about things that you can’t solve today, because you won’t be able to solve them tomorrow either.
29. Didn’t *** teach you courtesy? If I like you, you have to be with me!
30. People live by watching other people die, and then letting others watch themselves die.
31. Stay with me, at least I love you more than others.
32. I insist on doing sit-ups every day. One to lie down at night and one to sit up in the morning.