1. Having a tomb after your death finally makes up for the regret of not being able to buy a house during your lifetime.
2. People are afraid of being famous, pigs are afraid of getting strong, and dead pigs are not afraid of boiling water!
3. Tell the truth.
4. Audience friends, I am a good man, I am - Zeng Xiaoxian.
5. If I don’t go to hell, whoever loves me will go to hell.
6. Do you know what is the most annoying thing? Instead of playing the piano to a cow, a group of cows are playing coins to you!
7. Exercise your muscles to prevent getting beaten!
8. Let’s face it, life is often much heavier than those idol dramas.
9. As the saying goes, if you drink enough, you will think about lust, but if you are full, you will have nothing to do.
10. It’s still broken. You might as well replace my microphone with a cucumber.
11. Don’t say never to me, I won’t live to that point.
12. You cannot hang yourself from a tree. You should try to hang yourself from several nearby trees several times.
13. If a university teacher teases a disabled person, you will be famous~
14. When a woman pursues a man, there is a veil between them . Men chase women, and mothers are separated from each other.
15. The three cobblers stinked Zhuge Liang to death.
16. Don’t do porcelain work without a diamond, and don’t wear a short skirt without a gold hoop.
17. Don’t fool me with the 1983 xo, get a bottle of this year’s.
18. My soul has been violated!
19. What do you want to do? Are you going to marry Yifei or his mother?
20. A man will not be evil if he has money, but a sow will become a monster if she climbs a tree!
21. When I fall asleep, I dream out my dreams and saliva.
22. Read more books, read more newspapers, eat less snacks, and sleep more.
23. Just like Zi Qiao.
24. People in the upper class always like to do some obscene things.
25. In order to cultivate my aura, I often eat garlic, onions and radishes. Now, I am full of aura from top to bottom and front and back.
26. Go to your grandma’s banana peels, this guy is cheating!
27. This is okay.
28. Whether you are stupid or not depends on whether you can pretend to be stupid.
29. A donkey can carry one hundred catties of grain.
30. As we all know, Comrade Hu Yifei is a strange flower among the many residents of our love apartment. With her unique personality charm, she has monopolized many records in the apartment over the years. , including: the most unreasonable. Likes to be nosy. The highest academic qualifications. The loudest voice. Also - the best at fighting.
31. Every time I write a resume, I will admire myself more than before.
32. If you step on a banana peel and fall down, you must get up and continue stepping on it. If you step on it, it will stop slipping.
33. The older you get, the more worries you have, and a 1G heart holds 2G worries.
34. This story tells us, don’t be unkind to others, because you may also be disliked by others; conversely, don’t be discouraged by being unkind to others, because, You may also not want to see people at any time.
It is precisely because I have always believed in this that I am alive today.
35. My life has been broadcast live!
36. Do you think this guy looks like Zhang Wei, or is he just Zhang Wei?
37. One hundred kinds of people have one hundred kinds of opinions. You cannot satisfy all people, because not all people... are human beings!
38. Don’t go so far, who is sure you can live to that day!
39. The bar does not sell alcohol, but salted fish.
40. Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the key!
41. If an idiot could fly, this would be an airport.
42. Some of those people’s names, I have forgotten, but some I will always remember. Just like, some people used to talk about everything, but in the end they had nothing to say!
43. As for me, except for the butt mark on the sofa, there is no evidence of living at all.
44. There are four and a half men here, what are you afraid of?
45. Don’t tease me, or I will molest you!
46. Don’t dirty my path of reincarnation by crying in front of my grave.
47. For girls: if you go out to hang out, you will get pregnant sooner or later.
48. I am small-minded, but I am not lacking. I am good-tempered, but I am not lacking!
49. I searched for her thousands of times, but when I looked back, that person still dismissed me.
50. Don’t seek to be a good match, just seek to feel qualified.
51. Don’t talk to me about life, quit!
52. What do you mean, you are not going to tell her a joke at this time, then you really become a joke.
53. I thought I was God, who could settle myself and save all living beings. But in the end, it was all in vain. I didn't help you realize your wish, I'm sorry. (Speechless) I am not God, I am lonely.
54. Life is a separate journey, even if there are some regrets. We also don’t have the chance to start all over again, rather than dwell on the past that cannot be changed. It is better to smile and cherish the future, because there are no ifs in life.
55. I have now learned a new game called Bull Bullet Coin.
56. Don’t fall in love with me, you’re hypocritical! If we can, let's get married!
57. Hello everyone, welcome to Xiaoxian’s Appointment. I am your new Xiaoxian and former friend!
58. If you take a big step, it’s easy for you to bullshit; if you take a small step, it’s easy for you to squeeze your balls; if you don’t bullshit or squeeze your balls, your balls will hurt because of your idleness. It’s so tiring to be a man. ?
59. It’s all customized anyway, so why use Hu Yifei! Lin Chiling~~~
60. I have done nothing but quarreling these days. All kinds of quarrels. Am I ignorant, or am I treating you like a human being?
61. What would happen if Hu Yifei and Teacher Cang were cloned together?
62. After eating it, the waist is no longer sore and the back is no longer painful.
63. Life is short, it must be sexy.