A few days ago, a young friend, Xiao Li, invited his mother-in-law in his hometown to take care of his children. However, her mother-in-law pointed out that after leaving her hometown, she could neither take care of the farm work at home nor have anyone to cook for her wife. My wife often wants to go out to eat sometimes, so she suggested that she could give some "grandchild care fees" to take care of the children. Xiao Li felt that what her mother-in-law said made sense, but at the same time she also felt very uncomfortable. Logically speaking, most people can understand that it takes hard work and expense for an elderly person to raise a grandchild; however, emotionally speaking, some people still cannot accept it.
Should I pay for this "grandchild care fee"? Should I give it?
I think: Legally speaking, the elderly have no direct obligation to support their children. If they take care of their children, the elderly should receive a certain amount of compensation for their labor. We cannot regard the idea of ??"paid grandchildren" as simply linking family affection directly to money, but as a claim of rights expressed by the elderly. The elderly are not unpaid labor, and filial children should fulfill more responsibilities. Try not to burden your elderly parents as much as possible. "Paid care for grandchildren" is not only a kind reminder to the children, but also a protection of the elderly's own rights and interests. Family members should give sufficient understanding and support to this. In particular, some elderly people do not have pensions, and their children should take the initiative to express their opinions.
However, father-in-law, mother-in-law, son, daughter-in-law, and grandson are all relatives after all. Excessive preoccupation between the two parties can easily affect family harmony. It is best for the elderly to voluntarily share part of the family responsibilities and help their children to take care of their grandchildren as long as their physical condition and energy allow. Being able to express gratitude to the elderly in other ways allows the elderly to feel the comfort of family affection. This kind of psychological mutual understanding and mutual care should be far more harmonious and happy than "taking care of grandchildren".