1
In the past, sons stayed at home to carry on the family line, and daughters took the dowry and married off. This kind of practice is a bit like a daughter changing her daughter-in-law, and her family has been passed down from generation to generation. Families without sons will recruit sons-in-law, or adopt children, etc. Anyway, there must be an heir in the family.
With the new society, men and women have long been equal, and the previous one-child policy, the issue of marriage has also changed. Especially when two only children get married, regardless of their in-laws or parents-in-law, the young couple have to give them a pension and die.
whose family name should those children born after their only children get married? Who will inherit the incense? For those who don't care about these old rules, this is not a problem at all, as long as the young couple discuss it well, the child has the same surname as anyone else.
but in the eyes of those who care about the old rules, this is a big problem. Some old people have a strong sense of family, and the feudal concept of "there are three unfilial, and there is no big future" is deeply rooted in their thoughts.
2
Liu Xiaorui and her husband are the only children. When they were looking for someone, their parents wanted to recruit a son-in-law for Liu Xiaorui. But in Liu Xiaorui's generation, every household is an only child. Who is willing to give the only child to others as a door-to-door son-in-law?
Because I can't get a son-in-law, and Liu Xiaorui and her husband are two people who have a crush on each other, my parents didn't object to their marriage. When doing a marriage, the man means to follow the old rule that the man marries and the woman marries.
However, Liu Xiaorui's family thinks this is no good. This is the only daughter in their family. After the daughter gets married, there will be no one in their family to pass it on. Therefore, parents suggested that the two sides should not marry, and the two families should be one! That is to say, the wedding rooms are bought together and decorated together, and the dowry and bride price are all exempted, and both banquets are held.
The man thinks it's a good idea. The daughter-in-law is the only daughter of her parents' family, and it's obvious that she will provide for her parents in the future, so they don't care whether to marry or not. So, the two sides did what the woman said, and the marriage went smoothly.
3
Not long after marriage, Liu Xiaorui became pregnant, and both parents were extremely happy. But then there is a new question, whose surname will the child be born with? Both parents want to take their family names, but they are embarrassed to say it, because once they say it, there will be conflicts between the two families.
In order to win the children's family name, parents of both sides secretly struggle. First of all, they please the young couple, deliver food today, and deliver it tomorrow, and be helpful to pregnant women. They want the young couple to be close to their families, and then let the children take their family names.
Later, the parents of both sides came up with the idea of naming their children by their own families, saying that it was a name, but actually it was to fight for their children's surnames. In-laws do ideological work for their sons, so that they can stick to their children's surnames; Parents-in-law do ideological work for their daughter, so that her daughter must never give in, and the child must be given the woman's surname.
As Liu Xiaorui's due date approaches, parents of both sides are more and more enthusiastic about naming their children. One day, my father-in-law even said through wine that if he was not allowed to take the child's name, he would deny his son and daughter-in-law.
4
Liu Xiaorui's parents are not to be outdone. One day, his father said half jokingly that if the child wouldn't let his wife take a name, they would come to rob the child. Liu Xiaorui and her husband were frightened when they heard this. They saw that the baby was going to be born. If this matter is not handled properly, it is estimated that the in-laws of both sides will become enemies.
At this juncture, the state has issued a new policy that couples with two only children can have another child, which makes the young couple in trouble finally think of a solution. Liu Xiaorui and her husband immediately decided to have a second child, whether it is a boy or a girl. Anyway, the first child is named after the man and the second child is named after the woman.
when the young couple announced this decision with their parents, both parents were surprised at first, but then they were very happy. All four people had no complaints and no longer argued about naming their children.
my father-in-law said that the matter of choosing a name should actually be left to the young couple, who are uneducated and can't get a good name. The parents-in-law also said that they would not fight for a name, and they didn't care what the child's name was.
Later, Liu Xiaorui gave birth to a son at the first birth, and took the man's surname, named after Liu Xiaorui. After three years, Liu Xiaorui gave birth to a second child, also a boy, named by her husband. Both parents are very satisfied, and the in-laws are still polite, which is a happy thing.
5
If the parents of the two only children are very concerned about their children's surnames after they get married, the young couple must handle the conflicts well and try to compromise as much as possible. Because parents-in-law are parents, so are parents-in-law. We must treat our elders equally.
In the family, since some problems are encountered, we should actively find ways to solve them. If it is not solved in time, procrastination will become a big problem, and finally it is possible for couples to divorce.
Imagine that if Liu Xiaorui's family didn't solve the problem of the child's name in time, there might be a big war between the parents after the child was born. Can the young couple ignore it after the big war between their parents?
The answer is definitely no, and there will be conflicts between young couples. Once there is a contradiction between young couples, this marriage will start to have problems, and then it will naturally be unhappy. Therefore, young couples must actively solve problems, take into account all aspects, and properly handle problems, so that families will be harmonious and happy.