As a naming expert, when naming babies, I often get confused parents or grandparents (very few grandparents) come to me for consultation. As an only child, when naming the baby, should he take his father's surname or his mother's surname?
When naming the baby, we use the baby’s horoscope (date, month, day, and hour of birth) and surname as the root, and the name as the branch. All the roots can grow many branches and leaves. From this From a perspective, it is OK to take the father's surname or the mother's surname. But I have also encountered many special horoscopes. Some of them follow the father's surname and the hexagrams are very good. Some of the hexagrams that follow the mother's surname are very good. At this time, if we only consider it from the perspective of the baby's fortune, I can also make some more pertinent suggestions.
However, with the opening of the second child, this year we are encountering more and more questions about whether the baby should be named after the father's surname or the mother's surname. As a naming expert and sociologist, this has triggered I thought a lot and found that this problem seems simple, but in fact it is not, because this is not only a family problem, but also a social problem.
For many modern small families, should the baby be named after the father's surname or the mother's surname? If this issue can be decided by the young couple through discussion, there is no need for everyone to care. Just name the baby according to the wishes of the parents; but if the elders of both parties care, then they must negotiate seriously with each other. But as a premise for negotiation, I want to tell you here that the question of whose surname should be adopted is really not a small issue, because whether the child adopts the father's surname or the mother's surname, it will have a series of very important impacts on the child.
First of all, China is a patriarchal society as a whole. Therefore, in most families, babies are named after their father’s surname. If your child also takes his father’s surname, then it is just a matter of conforming to the times. trend. It's okay if you follow your mother's instincts, but you may have to pay a certain price. Think about it when you were in school, the teacher would unconsciously determine your father's surname when he saw your name. I believe everyone must have experienced this, but when teachers, classmates and other people find out that you have your mother's surname, what will be their first reaction? Single parent family? Dad is the door-to-door son-in-law? Then discrimination occurred.
Similarly, when everyone finds out that your child takes his mother’s surname, everyone’s first reaction may be the same. Of course, this inference is not correct, because your family is very good and your child also has a Good father; however, everyone will definitely make judgments based on the overall understanding of the entire society. This way of judgment cannot be said to be right or wrong, because the entire society is like this. Although today's society is very enlightened, you cannot change other people's thoughts and inferences. Way.
Second, naming the baby is a matter of family inheritance. If the mother’s family is relatively ordinary, and you marry into a wealthy family, even if you are an only child, then let the child take the father’s surname. Well, your baby will get more family resources and advantages, which people with your surname will never have, because after all, few families will leave a lot of family resources and industry to a person with a foreign surname. It may be possible abroad. There are very few in China. As long as your baby takes his father's surname, he will gain a lot of resources and status from your husband's family from the moment he is born. This is something your family can never give to a child who takes your surname.
Thirdly, if you happen to be a Phoenix man and marry a wealthy daughter, then the question of naming the baby and whose surname seems to be complicated. Because China is a patrilineal society, it seems natural for children to take their father's surname. However, because the woman's family is too powerful, if the child takes the mother's surname, it can gain more family and social resources and a higher status than taking the father's surname. Here, I'm just stating my opinion. Let the child take his mother's surname. After all, my little face is not worth the child's future.
In our hometown, there used to be a wealthy coal mine manager with a lot of assets. He had three daughters but no sons. At that time, in order to find a partner, no one of these three daughters was willing to recruit him into the family (marry out). There is more room for choice than recruiting someone at home).
The old man became angry and told everyone that none of his daughters or sons-in-law would have a share of the money he earned in his life, but all his grandchildren and granddaughters, as long as they had his surname, would have a share; those who did not have his surname would not be considered. hehe. . . . . . Almost all the grandchildren and granddaughters later took the surname of the wealthy mine manager.
Fourth, let’s talk about the second child. China has already allowed the second child. Logically speaking, if the eldest child takes the father’s surname, the second child can take the mother’s surname. I think, no matter what , everyone should take care of the feelings of being an only mother and her family.
Finally, should you name your baby after the mother’s surname or the father’s surname?
Don’t ask me what is right or wrong, and don’t ask why you can sit back and relax if you take your father’s surname, but you must bear the corresponding social pressure if you take your mother’s surname, because this has existed since ancient times. A truth that is not a truth:
There is a price to pay for challenging social rules.
But, dear mothers, fathers and babies, are you ready to bear the corresponding social pressure? Do you also plan to prepare your baby to bear the corresponding social pressures?
So, as long as you make all the preparations, dear mothers, be brave enough to let your second-born baby take your surname.