It’s going to rain, my mother is getting married, and the rain is pouring outside the window, so I can only talk nonsense at home!
I heard that the word "sissy" has become popular again recently, and it is likely to become a cultural trend.
By the way, I am not an insider, and I don’t care about insider affairs. I want to talk about these celebrities, but I don’t know a few of them, so let’s talk about culture.
The word "sissy" is not an advanced word, but it actually has a long history.
After a rough look at the historical materials, it should first appear in "The Firearms Chronicles of the Ministry of War of the Ming Dynasty". You can check whether it is the earliest~
Records say that around the fifteenth year of Wanli, the Ming Navy encountered an attack by Portuguese pirates while cruising in the South China Sea. So the two sides squared off and had a fierce fight.
The Ming Dynasty’s navy was so powerful that it completely wiped out the Portuguese pirates. While collecting the loot, a never-before-seen artillery piece was discovered on an abandoned pirate warship. The navy chief at that time felt that the cannon was very energetic, so he ordered his people to be taken to Beijing to ask for a reward from Emperor Wanli.
Not to mention, after repeated tests by officials from the Ministry of War, they came to the conclusion: This cannon is huge, powerful, fast-firing, and has a long range, far exceeding our "Tiger Crouching Cannon." At the end, he also made a note to the emperor: It is recommended to imitate!
Emperor Wanli was still young at that time. He had just brought down Zhang Juzheng and was very motivated, so he approved it with a wave of his hand and ordered the Shenji Camp to summon craftsmen to imitate it immediately.
This cannon is the famous "red cannon" in history, also called "red barbarian cannon", and is commonly known as "red cannon" among the people.
Although it is imitation, which is much simpler than creation, it is still somewhat difficult. It is said that the person in charge of making the cannon was dumbfounded when he took a look at the cannon. He said that the cannon did not look complicated, and he had never thought of opening so many parts inside. We have no experience with this, so we will try to build ten of them first. Well, if I make too much, I'm afraid it will all be wasted.
The Chinese may not be good at anything else, but their ability to imitate is beyond question. You see, whenever something new comes out in the world, it doesn’t matter if you don’t have the technology. If you buy one and study it, we will definitely build a new one for you within ten days and a half. Not to mention counterfeit products, they are often better than the original ones, so you have to accept them.
At that time, the Daming Firearms technology had always been in a leading position in the world, and they had experience in forging firearms such as the "Folangji", so within half a year, the "Red Cannon" was also produced.
What should I do if I get it out? Let’s try the cannon!
It’s not that simple. Large weapons like artillery were symbols of gods in ancient times. At that time, technology was not yet developed, and there was often a risk of exploding the barrel. A self-made cannon would blow up one’s own people. Death is common.
What to do? This is when feudal superstition comes into play. At that time, everyone believed that before testing a cannon, one should ask for blessings from the gods, that is, ask the God of Cannon to come down from the sky and bless the cannon to only blow up the enemy and not oneself.
So, everyone invited a Taoist priest to perform a ritual ceremony for the ten new cannons, and invited a cannon god for each cannon. They also gave each of them a name, such as "Zhenyuan" and "Zhenshan" "Iron Power" and so on, in the end they were all given the honorary title of general.
So in ancient times, artillery was revered as a god. You can't be like Li Yunlong, who always says, "Second Battalion Commander, where's your damn Italian artillery? Pull it up!" This is the artillery god. That's disrespectful, it should be "Second Battalion Commander, where is our Italian general's artillery? Please bring it up to me quickly!"
Invite the god, give him a name, bestow an honor, and appease the artillery god. Posted, now it’s time to test the cannon.
On that day (it is said that it was an auspicious day selected by someone from the "Qintian Supervisor"), ten new cannons were taken to the shooting range on the outskirts of the city and fired one by one for a test.
The first nine cannons all went off at one o'clock, with great power and a sound that shook the world. But when it was the turn of the last gun, the cannon did not go off for a long time.
I don’t know the specific name of this cannon. You can play whatever you want, whether it's "Lu Han" or "Feifan", you can choose your own seat.
The cannon didn't sound, but the craftsman who made the cannon was frightened. Ordinarily, nine out of ten guns will go off. This yield is high enough. Why should we be scared?
Because some important projects at that time had to be engraved with the names of the craftsmen, such as city walls, city gate bricks, cannons, etc., so that if there was a problem, it would be easier to find someone. The first nine doors are all ringing, but your last door is silent. Do you think the craftsman who makes the cannon is not afraid?
Since it doesn’t sound, you need to check. It is said that the craftsman was about to go over to see what was going on, when the cannon actually went off, and there was a "Duang" sound. The cannonball only flew half a meter, and it had not exploded yet. It was so powerful that it could hurt someone's foot.
So, open it and check it, check it again, open it again, and check it again.
This is no problem! This cannon is no different from the first nine, but why is it so soft?
The ancients were very wise. Since there was no technical problem, they could only blame it on the gods and ghosts, so they invited a famous fortune teller in the capital to take a look.
Fortune tellers are very good. As soon as they heard about this, they knew something about it: it must be the fault of the Cannon God. I saw him walking in front of the ten cannons, closing his eyes, using his divine power and luck, opening his heavenly eyes, looking around, and suddenly smiled: I see, this is the problem!
Everyone asked anxiously: "Sir, what's the problem?"
The fortune teller smiled and said, "It's amazing!" He said that the other nine cannons were fine because they invited a male cannon god when praying to the gods, but for some unknown reason, this XX cannon invited a goddess from the sky. Think about it, if you let a lady stand here naked and fuck you, how can she not be angry? It's okay this time, she's just giving you a little lesson and softening up a bit, maybe you'll explode next time. < /p>
So, not long after, with the special approval of Emperor Wanli, this XX general cannon was renamed XX sissy cannon. It had to be covered with red gauze when going out, the muzzle was painted with rouge, the barrel was hung with spices, and the cannon wheels were pink. ribbon. I tried the cannon again soon after, and sure enough it went off as soon as it fired. Although it didn't hit far and it was still a little curved, it finally went off.
Finally, after discussion with the Ministry of War, Shenji Battalion posted a notice:
If you encounter a sissy by chance, there is no need to worry! And if you provide him with more than good rouge every day and serve him with high-quality gauze, you can keep him safe on the battlefield. All generals must make the best use of their resources and must not miss the opportunity to fight!
After the Qing army entered the customs, they seized this sissy gun and gave it to a princess. Can I talk nonsense?