A classic sentence
1. Once when I was waiting for the bus, a BMW drove past. An expert next to me said to the people next to him: "Look, we just drove past. That one is IBM."
2. A friend was interning at China Unicom. He walked in and said, "Get me a mobile card." My friend didn't even look up. He said: "Master, someone is here to cause trouble!"
3. One day, the wind was strong, and the bicycles fell in a row. I heard a classmate support the bicycle and say: "Whose Mercedes-Benz is overturned?" My BMW? ”
4. The girlfriend in the dormitory got on the phone with the netizen, and she looked very excited: “Hey, I’m Wang Xiaoliang.” I can’t help but faint...
5. Chinese language test paper for the mid-term exam, the classical Chinese translation is "A harsh government is fiercer than a tiger." I translated it as "Exorbitant taxes and miscellaneous taxes, more ferocious than the teacher!" After handing out the paper, I realized, sweat! The head teacher drew a huge red circle. That question was worth one to two points, so I deducted five points.
6. There was a power outage, and my dad’s mobile phone charger was still connected to the socket. He was holding a candle and looking for something. I asked him what he was looking for, and he said, “Why is the green light when charging missing?”
7. One day, I saw a teacher in her early thirties who still has a charming personality. What she cares most about now is grasping the tail of youth. The "venomous queen" of our class wanted to praise her sincerely, but she didn't know that as soon as she opened her mouth, she would : "What a young middle-aged man!"
8. My classmate's friend is rather dull but good-looking. He was admitted to a famous theater school last year. When he came back, we asked him what the test content was. He said that the examiner asked him to play an idiot, and he acted responsibly. I asked him how he acted, and he replied: "I didn't act. I just walked around and was chosen..."
"Who has more power"
A 4-year-old boy asks his father to do something, but his father always ignores him. After a period of observation, once, he shouted to his father: "Bring me an apple, I am mom."
"Profound Meaning"
The history teacher asked: "U.S. The Statue of Liberty is holding two things, one is a torch held high, and the other is a book on the chest. Which student can tell what their meanings are?
A student answered: " You have to work hard even when the power is out."
Doctor: "Why can't I find my pen? I still need to write a prescription."
The patient reminded in a low voice: Didn’t you put it in my armpit? . . . Wait, if it's not enough, I can write to you again.
A story about a dog..
Once upon a time, there was a newly married couple. The husband often traveled on business, and the woman was at home every day with nothing to do..
The husband suddenly found out one day that his wife was suspected of cheating. After that, he thought that there was no evidence. The dog is for sale... and he can answer the phone (exaggeration)... The husband immediately called to place an order. The dog was delivered in the afternoon. The owner also equipped the dog with a mobile phone... The next day the company had something to do to recruit the husband. On a business trip... On the first day of the business trip, my husband called the dog and asked the dog how many people were at home today. The dog said... woof... telling the owner that there was someone at home today... the husband would feel at ease. I hung up the phone. My husband called me back the next day. I asked the dog how many people were in the house today. The dog replied... woof woof... my husband was thinking... and barked twice to explain. There were two people at home. My husband felt something was wrong and asked the dog what they were doing. What do you think the dog answered...
In addition to barking, what else do you think dogs can do? Think about it... What sounds do dogs make when they are hot in the summer... Think about it... The dog barked twice... There are two people at home... What can two people do at home... The key is to make you laugh The place is in the dog’s last answer..
Two bananas for a walk together
The weather is really, really hot gt；0lt;
Then The banana walking in front peeled off its skin
Then the banana walking behind fell down......
Achievements
After the mid-term exam, the math teacher wanted to announce the results. He said:
"There are as many people above 90 as there are above 80; there are as many people above 80 as there are above 70. The number of people who have failed is also the same."
As soon as we were joking, the whole class cheered, and a classmate asked: "So...how about the number of people who failed?"
The teacher didn't The quick answer: The number of people who failed is as many as the number of people in the class."
English class...
: This is what my junior told me... ....
: One day they were in English class....
: The teacher asked the students to name commonly used English words...
: Classmate No. 1 said: ok...
: Classmate No. 2 said: thank you.....
: Then I called a classmate... .
: He stood up and said unhappily: shirt....
That’s shit! Shirt is a shirt....
Smiling Jiuquan
Once, during a Chinese class, in order to understand the Chinese proficiency of this overseas Chinese student, the teacher
just asked him some related idioms.
『Can you say an idiom to describe a person who is very happy? ”
The Chinese teacher asked a question and said: “However, it is best to have a number in this idiom,
For example, one, two, three, four. ． ． ． ． ． ”
The overseas Chinese student thought for a while and said happily:
I know, “Smiling Nine Springs”!
Ha! What a "Smiling Nine Springs"! The whole class burst into laughter, and the elderly Chinese teacher almost fainted.
Stand up
A class monitor fell asleep in class and asked his classmates to call him after class. The classmates made a prank.
A: Get up, get out of class is over!
The monitor rubbed his eyes: stand up!
At this time, only a dozen students stood up sleepily and said: Thank you, teacher!
Learning English
Once I was tutoring a junior high school child and found the following horrible words in his English textbook:
Dad died (bus)
My brother is dead (yes)
My brother is dead (girls)
My sister is dead (Mis?)
......
Dead light (school)
Geography test
During the geography test, the teacher asked students to briefly describe the following places:
Arabia, Singapore, the Cape of Good Hope, Rome , Nagoya, Macau.
Xiao Ming wrote: Once upon a time, there was an old father-in-law, everyone called him Arab.
One day he went out to climb mountains, and when he climbed to Singapore
Suddenly Seeing a Roman with a Cape of Good Hope on its head rushing towards him, he was so frightened that he ran into Nagoya and quickly closed Macau.
University Food
A freshman bought a scone and was walking on the road when suddenly a large car drove towards him. In panic, the scone dropped and fell under the wheels. When the car passed by, the remorseful freshman was surprised to find that the scones were intact and embedded in the ground! In order not to waste, he decided to pick up the scones, but he failed to pick them up with his hands and spoons. When he was in trouble, he happened to A kind-hearted old student passed by, and after understanding the situation, he immediately took out a fried dough stick from his schoolbag without saying a word, and saw a "bang", and the scones came out!
Euphemism
The professor was giving an ethics class. He told the students how to remind others of embarrassing things.
"For example, if you see grass clippings on a girl's butt, you should politely do so
Say: 'Girl, there are grass clippings on your shoulder'. The girl looked towards her shoulder, then down - she saw it.
At this time a female student stood up with her hands raised. He got up and said, "Professor, your tie's zipper is open!"
Girl
One night, I was strolling on the Third Education Platform, when I saw a woman coming gracefully with long hair. Gone with the wind, I can't help but look at it sideways. After approaching for a moment, the woman suddenly stopped and looked at me. Yu secretly said, "Aren't I very handsome?" But when I saw Yi's eyes widened and the corners of her mouth twitching, I sighed, "Am I too ugly?" But he saw that Yi's eyes were getting wider and wider, and his mouth was opening wider and wider. I was so afraid that I secretly thought that I was a true gentleman in normal times and had never offended her, let alone not knowing her. I almost wanted to turn around and run away, but suddenly I heard Yi shouting "...ah...sneeze!!!". Yi rubbed her nose and drifted away. I was sweating profusely.
Twice
When I first entered the school, I took the student code test and everyone copied it. There are two of them:
: Those who have cheated twice during college should be advised to do so. Drop out of school.
: Those who get married during college are advised to drop out.
I have bad eyesight, so when I handed out the paper, I found that it was copied as follows:
: Those who got married twice during college were advised to drop out.
African wild boar
The biology teacher was enthusiastically describing the appearance of the African wild boar on the stage.
Occasionally, when he glanced around the audience, he found that most of the students were laughing. Sleepy. So he was furious
and shouted: "You have to look at me! If you don't look at me, how do you know
what an African wild boar looks like?"
Joke from the middle school English teacher
When I was in high school, my English teacher D was very good at English, but unfortunately my Chinese was not good.
In class one day, Teacher D explained "independent structure" and gave a classic example:
"Our teacher comes into the classroom, book under arm."
Then translated into Chinese: " The teacher entered the classroom with a book under his crotch."
The class burst into laughter.
Grading
This is a joke told by the class teacher
Once upon a time, there was an old gentleman who graded students and only gave three grades
The most The best is called dog fart
The second best is called dog fart
The worst is called fart dog
The chicken crows in the middle of the night
When I was in junior high school, in English class One chapter is "The cock crows in the middle of the night."
When the teacher was teaching, Shundai talked about the roots of English words:
Landlord is composed of land, land, and lord, owner. - "land"
+ "owner" means "landlord"
Then, the teacher asked everyone: What does motherland mean?
“Landlord!” Everyone replied in unison.
The professor said...
One day a certain professor suddenly stopped teaching.
He said to everyone sincerely:
If you sit down If the students chatting in the middle can be as quiet as the students sitting behind playing cards,
then the students sleeping in the front will not be disturbed.
Department of Philosophy
A certain gentleman graduated from the Department of Philosophy of Fuzhou University. After graduation, he could not find a job and remained unemployed at home. One day, a college classmate introduced him to work at Muzha Zoo, and he happily went. It turns out that a tiger in the zoo was temporarily ill and sent to the hospital, so he was asked to put on a tiger skin for a while. He thought no one would know it was him anyway, so he agreed.
After putting on the tiger skin and entering the animal cage, he walked around pretending to be a tiger. Not long after, the animal cage opened, and another tiger came in. He was so frightened that he kept retreating to the corner; and that The tiger kept approaching him...
...When it finally retreated to the point of no return, the tiger spoke...
"Don't be afraid, brother! I am from the Department of Philosophy, National Taiwan University!"
Down to Earth
This is a true story that happened in a senior's dormitory:
Fa Ge has a new girlfriend, and he brags about it to everyone he meets. How beautiful is his girlfriend's appearance... One day
Fa Ge sat alone at his desk looking at his girlfriend's photos and marveled at them, saying, "It really looks like a fairy descending to earth...
"The roommate was curious for a moment and couldn't help but want to borrow photos to see the fairy descending to earth, preparing to be "surprised"
But after reading it, he only had one question: "When you, the fairy, descended to earth.... Did you hit the ground face first?"
What is it called?
It is said that there was a shy little boy who fell in love with a beautiful and elegant woman. He was shy
I secretly observed her life every day, and finally found a cycle--she must eat noodles at a certain noodle shop
on a certain day every week.
He felt that the time was ripe, so one day he waited for her at the noodle shop. When she entered the shop and sat down, he took a deep breath
, mustered up his courage, and strode towards He asked her name before.
He said: Miss, what is your name?
The lady opened her big eyes and said to him: My name is Beef Noodles.
p>
Animals
Teacher: What are you wearing on your feet?
Student: It’s leather shoes
Teacher: Where does that leather come from? ?
Student: It comes from cows
Teacher: So, what is the animal that provides you with leather shoes and meat?
Student : It’s my dad.
Succinct and to the point
My middle school classmate is famous for his concise and to the point. One day there was a group meeting in the class, which was unbearably long.
Finally, everyone was asked for their opinion. When he was asked, he replied: "I want to urinate.". ?
Fossils
Geology students were doing field practice, and a student happened to find a large fossil. Lecturer A said
It was a tree fossil, Lecturer B insisted it was a dinosaur leg bone. Both sides argued endlessly. The students
didn’t know who was right, but they knew that both lecturers were going to grade their internship reports
so a smart classmate wrote on the report and found out The dinosaur's wooden legs.
Couplets
The Chinese teacher explained the couplets on the stage, giving an example: "A certain newspaper once publicly solicited "Nantong
zhou north, Tongzhou, south, north, Tongzhou, Tongnan, north." As a result, there were a lot of submissions, and one sentence was very good, which was "Pawn shops in the east and things in pawn shops in the west pawn things in pawn shops." At this time, a naughty student suddenly
He yelled, “Boys and girls, boys and girls.
”
Poly detector
Dad had a lie detector. He asked Dehua: "How was your math score today?"
Dehua replied : "A" the polygraph machine rang!
Dehua said again: "B" the machine also rang!
Dehua changed it and said: "C" the machine rang again !
Dad shouted angrily: "I always got A's before!"
At this time, the polygraph machine overturned!
Bird Exam
It is said that there is a final exam for a certain subject in the Zoology Department of a certain school (as for which subject it is, it is no longer the focus,
I don’t ask). The old professor is holding a black cloth The birdcage is covered with only two bird legs exposed
The exam question is: write down the species of the bird based on the observed bird legs.
A student worked hard to prepare for the exam Zhou, he didn’t take any test, and he got like this
He didn’t know how to take the bird test. He got angry, so he slapped the table and handed in a blank paper in advance (without writing his name and student number)
p>
!! The old professor was very angry and asked the student to leave his name...
The student just pulled up his trousers, exposing his hairy legs, and said to the old professor : "Guess who I am"!!
Check
An invigilator was staring at a student throwing dice in confusion. The strange thing was...
The student threw the same question several times...
I asked the student why?
The student replied helplessly: Is it so difficult that I don’t need to check it?
Professor
"I brought a frog today," the zoology professor said to the students. "I just caught it from
the pond. This lesson we are going to dissect a frog."
He took out a cardboard box and opened it carefully. Inside the box was a ham sandwich.
"Strange," the professor was very surprised, "I clearly remembered to have lunch."
Ridiculously clever
There was a graduate from the Agricultural College When I returned to my hometown, I saw an old gardener transplanting fruit trees. He said: "Your transplanting method is very unscientific. If you do it this way, you can harvest 7 apples from this tree, which will surprise me
."
The old gardener looked at him and said slowly, "Not only you, I am also surprised.
Because this is a peach tree"
Roll call
A newly graduated normal teacher went to a primary school to teach first-grade students
Her first The thing is to ask students to write their names in the homework book
After that, she took back the homework book and called the names one by one and sent them back, and at the same time got to know the students
But there was one, she I called ten times but no one came to collect it...
"Yellow belly! Yellow belly!...What happened? Where did the person go!!"... .............
In the end, after all the copies were distributed, there was still one copy left, so "those who haven't got it yet raise their hands!!"
At this time, a small girl raised her hand, and the teacher asked: "What is your name?"
".....Huang Yuepo, teacher... ."
The exam is over
Wang You's final exam results were not satisfactory. So he sent a telegram to his brother, asking his father to be mentally prepared.
Soon, his brother Call back: "Father is ready, now please be mentally prepared."
Bedtime talk
One night, a boy's dormitory had a sleeping talk that lasted until three o'clock in the morning, and suddenly I thought Discuss a question: "When you meet a
beautiful girl, what should you say first?" A certain gentleman woke up from his dream and said: "Stop talking, let's sleep!"
Cheating
" Polonius was fired for cheating. ”
”What’s going on? ”
”During the physical hygiene examination, he counted his ribs and was discovered. ”
Composition
When I was a child, my deskmate was very poor at Chinese and it was very difficult to write. Once the teacher asked us to write a composition called lt;lt;Looking at the Clouds;gt;
He is in pain, how should he write to pass?
The first sentence: The weather is very good today, the sun is shining on the earth, and there are no clouds in the sky.
No words.
Thinking...
The professor is kind and humorous. There is a tall and strong physical education student in the class. When the professor's voice comes every time, the physical education student starts to sleep until the physical education student wakes up on time after class. One day, the physical education student arrives and the professor is kind. He said to him
"JACK, please don't be late in the future. This will affect your normal sleep."
Regulations
One day's math class, like As before, the students were listening carefully and taking notes.
The teacher suddenly said in a serious tone: "This is a rule!" "Then the teacher said in a questioning and rhetorical tone: "
What are the regulations? "Everyone was at a loss, their eyes widened. The teacher said in an intriguing tone:
"The tortoise's butt is the bastard's butt! "There was silence.
After a while, the teacher suddenly realized: "I'm sorry, I said it wrong, I said it wrong." There was an uproar.
Tsinghua Teacher
A young man from Tsinghua University The teacher loved mahjong. Once, he played all night. He had a class at 7:40 the next morning. He got off the mahjong table at 7:30 and rushed to the fourth teacher for class. It happened to be on duty that day The student on duty did not erase the blackboard.
He shouted: "Which one is the banker?" He shouted again: "Where is the whiteboard?"...
This is a Chinese class. When talking about new words, the teacher picked up the chalk and wrote a word on the blackboard. "China",
Then he said: "Students, please look at the whiteboard. There is a red center on it. "
It takes a boar.
A student in a rural primary school was late. He explained to the teacher: "I am going to send a pig for breeding this morning.
The teacher asked: "Can't your father do this?" ”
“No, it must be a boar.” ”
Taste
The Chinese teacher found Zhang San sleeping in class and was very angry, so he woke up Zhang San and asked: Why did you sleep in class.
But, Zhang San San refused to admit sleeping.
Zhang San: I didn’t sleep.
Teacher: Why did you close your eyes?
Zhang San: Teacher, I’m here. Read the text silently.
The teacher didn’t believe it, so why did you just keep nodding?
Zhang San: Teacher, your lecture was very good.
The teacher still didn’t believe it. , said: Then why are you drooling?
Zhang San: Teacher, your lectures are very interesting.
Do one good thing every day
Teacher asked two questions. A student asked: "Did you do one good deed a day today?"
The two students answered in unison: "Yes!"
The teacher asked: "What did you do?" ”
Student: “Let’s help an old lady cross the road.”
Teacher: “Well, that’s great, but why do we need two people to help an old lady cross the road?” ?”
Student: “Because the old lady didn’t want to cross the street.”
Conclusion
The professor was very troubled by the series of questions from the students in class. I have no choice but to say: A fool can ask more questions than ten smart people can answer. No wonder so many of us fail when we take exams.
Everyone has their own explanation
A student asked the teacher for advice: "What is the difference between hitting someone and being hit?" History teacher: The person who hits is the aggressor, and the person being hit is the victim. English teacher: Hitting someone is active, being hit is passive. Physics teacher: Hitting someone is exerting force, being hit is resistance. Dean of Students: Each student will receive a major offense.
"Where are my shoes?" the absent-minded professor murmured at the end of get out of class.
"It's on your feet," one student said.
"Oh, isn't it? Fortunately you saw it, otherwise I would have gone home barefoot."
One night, the absent-minded professor came home very late . When he reached the door, he suddenly remembered that he had forgotten his key.
He knocked on the door for a long time before his wife got up and opened the door. Because it was dark, she did not recognize him, so she explained:
"I'm sorry, sir, the professor is not at home." The professor was as absent-minded as usual, and he replied: "Okay,
I’ll come back tomorrow.”
The absent-minded professor fell ill and had to be admitted to the hospital. When the doctor came to the door of his ward, the nurse said:
"Professor, the doctor is here." The poor professor snorted and said: "Tell him I can't see him now. I'm too sick
It’s amazing.”
The eyes are in the front
Teacher: “During thunder, lightning and thunder sound at the same time. Why do we see the lightning first and then hear it? Thunder?"
Student: "Because the eyes are in front of the ears."
That's it.
During the school's annual trip, the boys and girls in the junior high school said: "The eyes are in front of the ears." We have different interests, so we always play separately. Girls walk around in swimming suits, showing themselves off and enjoying the sun. The boy rolled up his pants and caught
small fish in the water.
A teacher in charge of these children lamented: "I don't remember girls being so
mature when I was in junior high school."
"Of course Yes, it’s just that you were busy catching small fish!” Another teacher said calmly.
What is the Battle of Chibi?
Student: "Teacher, what is the Battle of Chibi?"
Teacher: "Bare arms means shirtless, so the Battle of Chibi naturally means shirtless fighting.
"
A certain monitor fell asleep in class and asked his classmates to call him after class. The classmates played a prank.
A: Get up, get out of class is over!
The monitor rubbed his eyes: stand up!
At this time, only a dozen students stood up sleepily and said: Thank you, teacher!
Graduation Ceremony
At the graduation ceremony, the principal announced that A classmate came to the stage to receive the award, but after shouting several times, the student slowly walked onto the stage. Later, the teacher asked the student, "What's wrong? Are you sick?" ? Or
Didn’t you hear clearly just now?” The student replied: “No, I’m afraid that other students didn’t hear clearly.”
The first episode of Bus Fun Facts.
A high school classmate told me that one time he and his classmate were riding a bus together. Because his classmate was fat and unkempt, he
Not long after his classmate got on the bus, he had a little sister. He said in a very childish and cute voice: Auntie. This seat allows you to sit down.
His classmate thought it was strange why this little girl wanted to give her seat, so he curiously asked: Why did you give
the seat to the older sister? Unexpectedly, the little sister replied confidently and confidently: The teacher said that she should give up her seat when she sees a pregnant woman! ! …The whole car was in silence!
Bus Fun Facts Episode 2
A classmate was taking the bus to school one day. The bus was overcrowded and it was raining heavily outside. Suddenly he arrived at a certain stop,
Someone is getting off the bus. It turned out to be a young lady in a long skirt. She was squatting slightly to get an umbrella. ah! When the station arrived, the car was also parked waiting for her to get off! So she stood up in a hurry (which is equivalent to pulling up), but she didn't expect that the hem of her skirt was too long when she was squatting down. She was stepped on by the people next to her and didn't notice... As a result, when she stood up (pulled up), her skirt
cracked... the hook broke. What's even worse is that... the pull... also... fell down... and the skirt fell down at a free speed.
All that remains is... Little pants! At this time, the bus driver... stayed there, and the whole bus was silent. No one dares to make a sound in the silence! !
It took about a few seconds until the lady pulled up and ran out at an extremely fast speed... Discover…. On a certain bus
there was a loud laugh...it took a long time to stop! It turned out that everyone was so frightened at the time that they didn’t even dare to laugh. They were afraid that the girl would cry, so they held it in! After she jumped out of the car, she held it in. Not…live…. Thousands of voices resound! !
What is courage...
During the mid-term exam of the philosophy department of a university, they taught an application topic about what courage is. A student wrote "This is it" on the exam paper and handed it in. ． ． The result was an A...
The last class
In the last class, the teacher asked: Does anyone want to express an opinion? Ah Fu will post something….
Afu: The teacher teaches very well.
The teacher nodded happily and asked: Do you think it is worth recommending to your classmates...
Ah Fu: It is very worth it...
The teacher smiled with satisfaction and asked: What is your reason?
Ah Fu said slowly: trapped. Harmful. he….
The teacher's face suddenly changed...
College student
A college student went to work on his uncle's farm during the summer vacation. One day, his uncle asked him to milk cows. , and gave him a pedal,
and asked him if he would be able to squeeze... The college student said: I am a college student, there is nothing I can’t do. 1 hour passed. 2 hours
hours…3 hours…. After a long time, he finally came back. The uncle asked: Why did it take so long? The college student replied: Milking a cow is easy, but getting the cow to sit on the pedal is more troublesome.
College Proverbs
Beijing University’s famous brand is the food of the Minyuan;
Beijing Foreign Language School’s girl is Tsinghua University’s Han;
The National People’s Congress’s hooligans are full of street station.
Tsinghua University produces fools, Peking University produces lunatics, Renmin University produces liars, and Normal University produces bastards.
It is said that Americans are poor in mathematics, but I have experienced it personally after I came here. A friend of mine is a student in the mathematics department. He teaches precalculus (our school is a very good school in the United States for science and engineering). In the exam papers he corrected, , made a lot of jokes:
1. when n=infinity, sinx/n=6. Can you imagine why? Someone
cancel the n in sinx with the n in the denominator to get six! ! !
2. An example was given in class: when n=infinity, lim (n/8)
=infinity (8 across), and then there was a question like this in the exam: when n=
infinity, lim (n/5) =? The answer for several people was to turn 5 sideways! !
There was a male deer. It ran faster and faster on the road. It ran faster and faster. What did it become in the end?... It was a highway (deer)... .Hahaha
Two bananas were racing. The one in front got too hot and took off his clothes, while the one behind him fell down
A college student was caught by the enemy. The enemy tied him to a telephone pole and asked him, "Where are you from?" If you don’t tell me, I’ll electrocute you! A college student replied to his enemy and was electrocuted to death. He said: I am from TV University!
Three little white rabbits picked a mushroom
The two older ones asked the younger one to get some wild vegetables to eat together
The younger one said I won’t go You guys will eat my mushrooms when I leave
The two big ones said they didn’t know how to do it, so they went and the little white rabbit went~~~
Half a year passed and the little white rabbit The white rabbit hasn't come back yet. The big one said it won't come back. Let's eat it.
The other big one said wait a little longer~~~
A year has passed for the little white rabbit. The two big ones haven’t come back yet, so we don’t have to wait and let’s eat.
At this moment, the little white rabbit suddenly jumped out of the jungle next to it and said angrily: Look! I knew you were going to eat me. of mushrooms
The tortoise and the hare are racing... The hare quickly ran to the front...
The tortoise saw a snail crawling very slowly. Slowly... said to him: Come up, I will carry you...
Then... the snail came up...
Then... the snail came up...
p>
After a while... the turtle saw an ant again... and said to him: Come up too...
So The ants came up too.
After the ant came up... saw the snail above... and said to him: Hello
Do you know what the snail said?
The snail said: Hurry up, this turtle is so fast...
One day, a fire broke out in the family,
Mom and dad ran away When they came out, only one son was left inside.
My mother shouted nervously outside the house:
"Son...what are you doing...it's already on fire and you still can't come out..." ."
The son replied: "I am wearing socks..."
The mother said again, "Why should I wear socks if there is a fire..."
p>
Five minutes later, the son still hasn’t come out...
The mother shouted nervously again, "Son, what on earth are you doing? Come out quickly~ It’s all on fire, still waiting Inside..."
My son said, "I'm taking off my socks..."
Q version of the sports meeting entrance ceremony
1. Department of Medicine
Outfit: white coat and mask
Slogan: Eliminate kidney stones and restore my health!
Promotional materials: two human skeleton specimens
The action of passing the rostrum: everyone marching forward and waving scalpels or needles
Leader’s reaction: very scary
2. Department of Architecture
Clothing: work clothes and helmet
Slogan: With us, you no longer lack "cover"!
Poster: Large-scale design drawing of the new campus of our school
The action when passing the rostrum: everyone steps forward, holding a steel bar with the left hand and waving bricks with the right hand
The leaders on stage reacted: Too violent! They are simply a bunch of young and Dangerous guys!
3. Department of Accounting and Finance
Clothing: The first few rows wear armored vehicle security uniforms, the back rows wear red vests
Slogan: If you are crazy, Please come and rob the bank!
Poster: A very large banknote
Motion when passing the rostrum: scattering paper money all over the sky
Reflections of the leaders on the stage: Not environmentally friendly. The opening ceremony completely swept the playground!
4. Department of History
Costume: all ancient costumes
Slogan: Fight against the Qing Dynasty and restore the Ming Dynasty, the world will be at peace
Promotional poster: Jurassic Dinosaur
The action when passing the rostrum: face the rostrum and practice a set of dog-beating stick techniques
Reflections of the leaders on the stage: Oppose force!
5. Department of Agricultural Sciences
Clothing: red cotton jacket and floral cotton trousers (and driving a group of livestock)
Slogan: Raise good cows and produce good milk!
Poster: The molecular formula of melamine is crossed out
The action when passing the rostrum: A whistle blows, and all the animals rush to the rostrum
Leaders on the podium Response: Everyone, run quickly, don’t let the animals trample