1. Love
Snow White, so pure and flawless,
But think about it carefully, Snow White knows a prince,
The one Cinderella knows is also a prince,
A woman with a special hobby who likes to kiss frogs kissed them,
The frog changed.
Has anyone ever thought that these princes are actually the same person?
At all, this prince doesn't know how playboy he is, and he is chasing girls everywhere.
He is shameless enough to dress up as a frog and go chasing girls.
2. My heart is still in my mouth
Before I fell in love for the first time, I thought I was Yang Guo,
And the only difference between me and Yang Guo in the book is that he has a big sculpture.
Like Yang Guo, I never thought about getting the first place in the exam.
I just need love. As long as I find my little dragon girl,
I can abandon my studies, retire from the mountains and live in the suburbs.
But I must stay in a hotel, not a village house. I'm afraid of snakes, insects, rats and ants.
Then I will go back to the city once a month at most, but I won't stay long.
I will go back after I get my monthly allowance from my mother.
That's right. Basically, I spent the whole middle school period under this transcendental thought.
The most popular topic in school at that time was: Should middle school students fall in love?
I think what we should discuss is: Should middle school students study?
Before my first love, I only had one condition for the little dragon girl: beauty.
I know I'm naive,
but I was very young at that time, and
I didn't know that figure was also important.
3. Fresh
What is the biggest requirement for a girlfriend now?
it's not beautiful, the most important thing is that it's fresh enough!
what is freshness?
That is to say: the one handed in for one year is not as fresh as the one handed in for half a year,
because the new understanding of half a year is fresh!
Similarly, those who have known each other for half a year are not as fresh as those who have known each other for three months.
Those who have known each other for one month are not as fresh as those who have not known each other for half a month.
And so on, finally ...
The one you know is not as good as the one you haven't known yet!
so what should I do?
is it good to soak? Once soaked, it is not fresh.
4. Women are great
In love, women are the greatest!
Men sacrifice for love in pursuit of beauty and beauty of the opposite sex,
Women's sacrifice is just to get a smelly man,
and the greatest thing is that they don't think it's sacrifice at all.
If you tell a woman: Miss, your boyfriend has bad breath!
She will say: Ha, people must have some shortcomings.
You said: He still has body odor and Hong Kong feet.
she said, that proves that he is average.
you said: his snoring sound is so noisy!
she said: then he must have dreamed of me, so happy!
you said: he peed and sprayed around.
she said: wow! How strong!
you said: don't wash your hands after sprinkling.
she said; Where do men wash their hands now?
you said: I have.
she said: like a woman.
you said: he always swears.
she said, but he has a kind heart.
you said: he is still smoking in the elevator.
She said: Smoking is forbidden everywhere now. What do you want when he hides in such a small corner to smoke?
5. where is the responsibility?
If you tell me that I can't act because I'm not handsome,
you shouldn't tell me, because it's none of my business.
You should tell my parents that they did this to me.
If you want to punish them, you should punish them.
In the future, whoever is ugly will be punished for not acting!
or just walk-on.
I'm not an irresponsible person.
I've been in charge for more than 2 years for the pleasure of my parents.
Do you think it's easy?
When I was a child, I didn't study well or even failed. I didn't hold my parents responsible.
I signed my parents' names on the test paper myself.
Whenever my parents quarrel,
Did I ask them to be patient for the sake of my childhood?
no!
I told them to make noise in the street.
When I grow up,
I don't know what religion I should believe, why people live, or what life goals are ...
I didn't ask my parents to help me.
Instead, I reminded them:
You should work hard to make money, save up for a rainy day, or you will be helpless when you are old!
6. Swimming Pool
Yellow: Those who go to the swimming pool are not called swimming, but are called soaking. Because swimming in the swimming pool,
you can only use one kind of fancy, that is, jumping, jumping up and down.
Zhang: If you are an expert, you can use the butterfly, but you have to dive into the water to use it.
Huang: Why are there so many people in the swimming pool?
Zhang: Don't ask. Take a dip while there are many people.
If everyone goes up, you will find that the water in the pool only reaches your knees.
Huang: I'm used to it anyway. Just soak in cold water, but it's a pity that the water is not cold at all. It's warm.
Zhang: Scared! It's so unselfish to pee here!
My parents taught me from childhood that I have to go to the pool next door because I have to pee urgently when swimming.
Huang: The next time you go to the swimming pool, you will know what they are doing.
Zhang: Especially those who are raking in the water inlet and outlet, do you want to destroy the bodies? Name
Name is just that parents impose their unfulfilled subjective wishes on their children,
So most girls' names are either "beauty" or "beauty",
Boys' names are either "strong" or "long",
But are we actually "beautiful"?
In fact, talk show is also called Dong Duxiao, which means "stand-up comedy" in English. Wong Tze Wah, a Hong Kong resident, was introduced into Chinese society from the west in 199. But at that time, there was no translation of "stand-up comedy" in Chinese, and finally Wong Tze Wah changed it to "stand-up comedy". Later, in his performance, Lin Haifeng called it "yes but no" (yes but no means "casually" in Cantonese, and no means "casually" in Cantonese), both of which are English translations of "stand-up" (the former is a free translation and the latter is a transliteration). According to Wong Tze Wah's talk show "Zhiyun Dinner", it was changed by Yu Shen.
Introduction to Dong Duxiao: