Many people say, "I never dream when I sleep."
Many people say that the quality of sleep is better. That's also true. Because people dream when they fall into deep sleep, they usually don't remember when they wake up.
The reason why we remember our dreams is that most people are in a shallow sleep state, so even if we sleep more, we will feel that we have not slept enough.
Babies sleep much more than adults, but can they reach deep sleep? Do you dream too?
The quality of children's sleep, their words in sleep and some movements when they turn over can actually reflect the happiness and unhappiness in their inner world.
dream
Sleep time is a continuation of daytime life.
After the birth of my son, the quality of sleep has not been very good. Simply put, I didn't sleep well enough. Me, too. I live a worried life. If children sleep around, it is basically difficult to sleep well all night. I'm always worried about whether he will kick the quilt, fall out of bed, need to go to the bathroom and so on. Plus, I didn't quit night milk until I was 2 years old. As long as you sleep with me at night, you will be in a bad mood the next day. I am listless at work and listless after work.
Later, I found out that it may be because of my anxiety that the child felt insecure. Then when I really can't sleep at night, I will observe the children's various reactions during sleep:
Sometimes it's called "mom", sometimes it's called "hug", and sometimes it's always called "don't"
It seems that someone has been chasing him in the dream.
Sometimes I wake up crying from my sleep, suddenly pushing you away and suddenly pulling you to his side.
Generally speaking, children are insecure.
I started looking for reasons and solutions:
1
Mom needs to adjust her insecurity.
More sensitive mothers also tend to fail to give their children a sense of security. The fundamental way is to make yourself feel safe.
It is also suggested that dad give children and mothers a sense of security and let mothers feel protected, which is to save you time, effort and trouble. On the other hand, if you blindly dislike, complain, blame and shirk responsibility, your mother's mood will only get lower and lower, and your child's personality will also have problems.
2
Listen carefully to what children say when they sleep at night, but don't talk to them.
If the words "don't", "don't" and "fear" often appear in children's sleep, it is necessary to find out whether family members have threatened their children on this day. The threats mentioned here are usually accidental, such as:
"If you don't XXXX, I'll call the police to take you away/I won't take you."
"How so stupid! /What's to be afraid of! /Look at other children who are braver than you! "
"Come on, come on/don't do this, don't do that."
The most important thing is to see if there have been any disputes or even fights in the family environment. One spouse always blames the other in front of the child, and often uses body language because of lack of patience with the child.
If the child frequently calls the name of a family member or kindergarten partner in his dream, it may be someone that the child is particularly concerned about or needs.
If there are characters and scenes in cartoons during children's sleep, it means that children spend too much time using ideas and products during the day. In order to prevent children from turning peer dependence into virtual role dependence, family members are advised to reduce the time children spend watching TV or mobile phones.
three
Find problems through children's actions in dreams.
If there is strenuous exercise in a child's dream, it may be excessive exercise during the day or anxiety. At this time, they need to calm their emotions in time.
Thinking of the analysis of Freud's dream in high school, I looked up some information and asked some friends. But no one knows your children better than yourself, so the two bedtime stories I choose below may only be effective for my children:
How can a kite fly?
Flying broom
There is no way to tell a story, but follow the following points:
1, the storytelling should be as thin as possible.
2, the story length control in 5- 10 minutes.
Don't tell different stories often.
4. If you buy a story book (including all children's picture books), you should read it yourself first and understand it first.
Children can have a rest if they don't want to listen to it one day.
Storytelling is on the one hand, and the most important thing is to solve family conflicts and provide a more harmonious living environment. As children enter the park and go to school, the people and things that children contact during the day will be more complicated. So irregular children's dreams will reflect more problems. A long way to go ~ ~
four
Transition from sleeping independently to sleeping in separate rooms
From birth to now, my son's sleep is really cool, still in a 360-degree circle. It's also my fault that I didn't sleep in separate beds at the beginning, so now I have to let nature take its course. I consulted a circle of mothers around me, and most of them said that you can't sleep in separate beds before you are 5-6 years old, so you don't have to force it. By then, the children can accept it themselves.
In the transitional stage, children's dreams will reflect more unexpected problems.
Almost three and a half years later, my son suddenly began to think about his father taking a bath, sleeping, sleeping alone, and even doing many things alone. Some of my male friends reminded me that when my son is older, my mother should take a back seat. If the child wants to sleep by himself, let him sleep by himself.
It can't be that easy! I'm used to sharing a bed with adults. If I want to be apart, I have to make a gradual transition.
Most men in China believe that it is the mother's responsibility to take care of the children and sleep with them. This may be caused by the example of our parents' generation. I have also met many warm-hearted fathers who take care of their children with their mothers. For example:
Mothers always worry about this and that when they sleep with their children; Dad will be much better and sleep with the children until dawn. Because the quilt is not covered in time, the child will inevitably catch a cold. At this time, the family should not blame. Your criticism is what makes the other person less motivated.
When a mother sleeps with her children, she can't help talking to them a lot. And fathers who sleep with their children often ignore their dreams. From the perspective of psychological comfort, fathers can give their children a sense of security more than mothers.
Once in a while, when I sleep with my children, my father will realize that it is not easy for my mother, and will gradually understand the influence of insufficient sleep during the day on work efficiency and mood. Of course, this process may or may not be long. It depends on whether the family division of labor is good and whether parents can understand each other.
What dreams do children usually have?
Dream of delicious food
Dream of flying and fear of falling.
Dream of monsters
I dreamed of a child.
I dreamed of what I was afraid of.
Dream of mom and dad
To sum up, children's dreams reflect their needs:
A. the dream of satisfying desire
B. Physiologically perceived dreams
C. Continuous dreaming of daytime activities
D. The dream of psychological trauma
E. Dream of team consciousness
F. Surreal dreams
The dreams of children aged 3-6 are generally the reflection of contradictions and inner conflicts. At this stage, children explore the concept of right and wrong more strongly and weigh between struggle and letting go; Need the same sex, interested in the opposite sex. So I will find that children say this and that for a while; It's normal to be willing for a while and unwilling for a while.
This kind of anxiety is actually another manifestation of self-awareness. Children will gradually find his understanding and view of the world through their own exploration. Don't say that children are disobedient or strange.
Therefore, parents who want to see this article, through their own exploration, do a good job in psychological debugging at all stages of their children in time. Even if you have a sixth sense, you can walk into your child's inner world.