The hardships of life, we can't change, we can only change the mentality of facing difficulties.
I have heard a fable before:
Two buckets hung on a well, and they began to talk about "bucket life".
A bucket said gloomily, "This kind of life is really boring. It's always full and then empty. What a waste. "
Another bucket said, "I don't think so." We always come empty-handed and then go back slowly. " Buckets that think like this are often cheerful and full of confidence in life.
The same thing, different mentality, determines different results. Many times, it is not that life itself is boring, but that your attitude towards things is too negative, which directly affects your life state.
Everything has two sides, the side facing away from the sun is positive, and the side facing away from the sun is dark and negative. We humans are always used to facing the negative side, because we have a primitive inferiority complex in our hearts. Sunshine thinking is to help us pull our consciousness out of the dark and negative side and make it develop to the positive side, and the problem will eventually be solved.
A positive attitude is the sunshine and dew of life, the cornerstone of success, and makes people's minds healthy and strong; Negative mentality is the source of failure and the chronic killer of life, which makes people trapped in a certain shadow set by themselves.
In ancient times, there was a king who dreamed that the mountain fell, the water dried up and the flowers withered, so he asked the queen to interpret his dream. The queen cried in utter amazement, "My king, the trend is not good! When the mountain falls, it means that the mountains and rivers will fall, and the water will dry up, which means that people are separated. The monarch is a ship, the people are water, the water is dry, and the ship can't. Flowers bloom and fall, indicating that the good times are not long. " The king broke out in a cold sweat and became ill from then on, getting heavier and heavier.
A minister went to visit the king, who spoke his mind on his deathbed. Hearing this, the minister smiled and said, "Your Majesty, your dream is really wonderful. Since then, the mountain has fallen and the world has risen." When the water dried up, the real dragon appeared. King, you are the son of heaven! Flowers wither, flowers wither to see fruit, which shows that China's grain harvest is abundant! " Hearing this, the king was relieved, and his illness soon recovered.
Asano Nagaakira Ichiro (1848 1930), known as the "Japanese cement king", came to Tokyo alone to make a living when he was young, when he was penniless. However, when he saw someone selling water on the streets of Tokyo, he was very happy to think: "Tokyo is really a good place, even water can be sold." It seems that it is not a problem for me to live here. "
Of course, some people will think, "Tokyo is a terrible place. Even water costs money. It seems that living here is very difficult. "
Therefore, things themselves do not affect people, but people are only influenced by their own views on things. There is no absolute right or wrong to look at things, only sunshine or not, and everyone has to bear the final result for his own point of view.
The world is full of pessimists and optimists. Pessimists relish a saying: "There are countless walls in this world." An optimist often says, "There are countless doors in this world." The difference between "door" and "wall" lies in whether you can see the watershed of the world in the sun.
Napoleon Hill, a master of success, said: "A positive attitude is the health and nutrition of the mind, which can attract wealth, success, happiness and health;" A negative attitude is a disease and rubbish of the mind, which not only excludes wealth, success, happiness and health, but even takes away everything in life. "
He also said: "There are only small differences between people, but this small difference has caused great differences!" The small difference is whether the mentality is positive or negative, and the big difference is success and failure. "
Professor seligman of the University of Pennsylvania was the first authority to put forward positive psychology. He published a research report. He selected 1 100 employees of MetLife as the observation object. After five years of follow-up, he found that the performance of brokers with positive thinking was 88% higher than that of brokers with negative thinking, and the turnover rate of negative thinking was five times that of positive thinking.
In the aspect of psychological confirmation, Kou Fei, a scholar of "motivation theory", pointed out that when people encounter setbacks, more than 90% people will choose five reactions: attack, depravity, depression, stubbornness and withdrawal, while the proportion of positive thinkers is less than 1%.
The key to enhancing positive energy is to change your "negative script". People who think negatively will feel "helpless" from unpleasant events and think that they can't change the status quo, thus forming the belief of negative scripts. They believe that no matter what happens, there will be bad consequences in the end.
Over time, he will lose his rational judgment on time and make negative decisions with negative scripts. Some people say, "Sunshine thinking means turning to light." This sentence is very tasty.
There are two views. One is that with the increase of population, energy will be less and less; The other is that with the development of science, more and more available resources will be developed. Faced with these two opposing views, optimists will believe the latter, while pessimists will believe the former.
Look on the bright side-this is sunshine thinking.
Aristotle said, "The essence of life lies in the pursuit of happiness." There are two ways to make life happy: one is to find time to make yourself happy and increase it; Second, find the time that makes you unhappy and reduce it. It is necessary to shape the sunshine mentality, mobilize the two positive emotions of interest and pleasure, and keep yourself positive.
Writer Feng Jicai has an article called "Generous Reading", which lists how some people should read, such as:
Some people are willing to lend you their umbrellas on sunny days, but when it rains, they leave quietly with umbrellas.
Don't blame him when you read him. Because he doesn't want to get wet in the rain (let alone someone else's umbrella) and he doesn't want to share other people's difficulties. What can you say? Keep an umbrella for yourself.
Some people, when you sow hard, stand by and refuse to shed a drop of sweat, but when you harvest, they share your fruit shamelessly for various reasons.
-when you read him, don't abandon him. Because someone is willing to share the joy of your harvest, no matter what kind of mentality he has, he should be welcomed. You made a little sacrifice, but you fulfilled a person's desire for performance. Slowly, he will learn some self-esteem and self-love.
A person is a book. There are causes and effects in the book, but what people show is only the present. Therefore, reading people is more difficult than reading, and it is even more difficult to read people with a generous heart.
Selfishness, influence, hypocrisy, laziness and superficiality are all mentioned here. They are not villains, but they always arouse people's disgust in daily life. And when we face these, how should we deal with them? When most ancient sages put forward "far villains", Mr. Feng Jicai put forward another point here. First of all, we should broaden our thinking and treat others according to our own needs. Then, reflect on yourself in this matter On the other hand, in the process of tolerating others, we urge ourselves to become better.
Teacher Feng's way of reading people is full of sunshine, and he is looking at the world positively. This is just as the author said: "Reading others is actually reading yourself. When reading the truth, goodness and beauty, we also read the hypocrisy behind the hypocrisy, the ugliness behind the beauty, and the cunning behind the smile ... Therefore, when reading people, we must learn to be tolerant and generous, so that we can read something beneficial to ourselves, noble, happy and happy. "
The pace of life often goes in a hurry. You should learn to stop and smile at the clouds, sit down and watch the flowers bloom, calm down like the sea, and settle down and watch comfortably.
When the mood is calm, everything reflects naturally, and the mind is extremely quiet, the moment is eternal.
Don't let life lose to your mood. Mood is not the whole of life, but it can control life. In a good mood, everything is fine, in a bad mood, everything is chaotic.