Psychologist: It is a sign of inferiority to always find fault with others. "The stupidest thing in life is that you have heard about it, and the worst thing in life is that you are good at talking about others." This sentence comes from "Western Words and Redundant Words" written by Shen Juyong, a scholar in Qing Dynasty. This sentence tells us that a person's character can be seen from his wrong attitude towards himself and others.
In life, there are often customers who have a hard time with restaurant waiters and parents who scold their children for their dog blood. There is a word in ancient China that can explain this kind of people-"humble and slow", that is, they are ostensibly arrogant and feel inferior inside. It is to cover up our inferiority complex, so we are superior, accusing and criticizing. Psychologists have found that people with low self-esteem prefer to talk about other people's shortcomings and belittle others, because they feel inferior to others, and only by belittling others to a position similar to or even inferior to their own will they feel comfortable. At the same time, because of my poor self-confidence, I have already doubted myself, and it will be even more unbearable to hear criticism again. In order to protect their self-esteem, they will take a defensive or even counterattack attitude towards criticism.
People with self-esteem and self-confidence can tolerate the shortcomings and mistakes of others and appreciate the advantages of others, because they don't think that others are better than themselves as a threat; They are also willing to accept criticism because they have stable self-knowledge and self-confidence in their hearts. In other words, they are willing to accept themselves, and being criticized will not hurt their self-confidence.
Compare yourself with the old saying, see if you have heard of yourself and talked about others, and you will know what kind of person you are. We should truly respect and love ourselves from the heart, and regard our mistakes as opportunities for growth, rather than denying ourselves. Only in this way can we expand our thinking, learn to tolerate other people's mistakes and appreciate their advantages. Such a life is wisdom, happiness and magnanimity.
This kind of person often criticizes his partner's words and deeds according to his own requirements, and will tirelessly nag and accuse him, leaving his partner in a state of shame. When the partner is picky enough, it will lead to the breakdown of marriage. Such people not only scrimp and save, but also ask their partners to be frugal. Therefore, the enjoyment and entertainment in family life are cancelled, and even the necessary expenses in life are reduced. As a result, the partner couldn't stand the life of this ascetic monk and fell through.