Excerpted from Preface to Autumn Poems (Beijing Literature and Ancient Books Publishing House, 1954 edition). A New Record of Yuchu is a note novel compiled by Zhang Chao in Qing Dynasty. Lin Sihuan, a native of Jinjiang, Fujian, was a scholar during Shunzhi period in Qing Dynasty.
● Comments on classroom texts
There is a man in the capital who is good at performing ventriloquism. In the northeast corner of the hall (hall, living room), there is an eight-foot barrier (barrier: screen, tent, etc. It's set, and the ventriloquist is sitting in the barrier with a table, a chair, a fan and a ruler. The guests sat together in small groups. After a while [later: after a while], I heard the tapping of a ruler in the barrier, and the whole audience was silent. Sit, use "seat". ], no one dares to wow.
Explain the time, place, facilities and props of the ventriloquist and the performance, as well as the situation and atmosphere of the audience during the performance.
This passage renders and paves the way for the wonderful performance described below.
A word "goodness" dominates the whole article. Four "one" characters, listing props, set off the superb skills of performers with the simplicity of props. The quiet and tense atmosphere formed by the words "sit still and dare not wow" and "stroke your feet" and "full" and "nothing" points out that everyone is like this. These eight words not only set off the performer's "goodness" in ventriloquism, but also showed the guests' yearning for this famous Beijing corner, showing his amazing artistic charm, creating a quiet atmosphere for the upcoming performance and setting off and paving the way for the next wonderful performance.
When a woman heard a dog barking in the deep alley, she was shocked to see that she was not stretching [stretching: yawning, stretching], and her husband was talking in his sleep. As soon as the child woke up, he began to cry loudly. The husband woke up. Women caress [caress: caress, comfort] The baby suckles [breast: feeding], the baby cries, and the woman pats and snores [whoops: refers to humming the baby to sleep]. Another big wake up, pour [pour: talk continuously]. When it's true, women clap their hands, their mouths blare, the baby cries, the baby just wakes up, and the husband scolds the baby, and it's all right at once, that is to say, all the voices are very similar. Bi, Quan and Du. 〕 。 All the guests at the table craned their necks, looked sideways and sighed silently, feeling wonderful.
The ventriloquist imitated a family of four and was awakened by the barking of dogs in the middle of the night. The guests silently lamented the superb skills of the performers.
This passage is the first climax of ventriloquism performance.
Point out that the story happened after people fell asleep. "Dog barking" is not only the reason why a family wakes up from sleep, but also the quiet atmosphere in the middle of the night is set off by moving and writing, so that everything can be heard clearly, even the sounds of "stretching" and "talking" can be heard.
From "listening" to "speaking", it shows the process of a family of four waking up from sleep. The ventriloquism performance is gradual and varied. The eldest son was "more than" because he was upset after being woken up. There are all kinds of sounds written here.
From "singing in sections" to "chorus". Write five sounds with parallel sentence patterns and fast language potential. "All the wonderful things are a must", which made ventriloquism performance reach its first climax.
From "far listening" to "thinking", write the process of sound from far and near, from outside to inside, from small to large, from sparse to dense, from few to many, and show the scene of a family of four waking up from sleep.
Write the guest's reaction to the ventriloquism performance. "Stretching your neck" and "staring sideways" mean that the guests are listening attentively, lest they miss anything; "Smile" means that the guests are satisfied with the performance. "Silent sigh" describes the way that guests are impressed by the performer's skills, but it is not convenient to applaud.
After a while, the husband began to snore, and the beating of the woman gradually stopped. I heard a mouse making a cable [cable: the sound of mouse activity], the washbasin tilted [tilted: overturned], and the woman coughed in her dream. The guests feel uncomfortable [uncomfortable: I feel a little relaxed. Less, a little. Relax, stretch, relax ), a little sit down.
The ventriloquist imitates the scene of four people waking up and going back to sleep, as well as the emotional changes of the guests.
This passage is not only the aftermath of the noise caused by the wake-up of four people, but also the prelude to the fire fighting in the middle of the night.
"Wake up", about her husband from waking to sleeping. "Beat gradually and stop gradually", the word "gradually", write the change of clapping sound from big to small; A word "stop" means that women and children are also moving from waking to sleeping. A word "micro" highlights the quiet atmosphere in the middle of the night and gives people a light and slow voice. The above writing sounds are from big to small, from dense to sparse.
Write the guest's reaction to the ventriloquism performance. The contrast between "sitting up straight" and "stretching your neck" and "staring sideways" and "slightly" shows in detail the gradual process of the guests' mood from tension to relaxation.
Suddenly, a man shouted "fire", the husband shouted, and the woman shouted. The two children burst into tears. A hundred people shouted, a hundred children cried and a hundred dogs barked. The middle (jiàn: inclusive) house collapsed. Lila, onomatopoeia. ) voice, hot voice, whistling wind, hundreds of works together; There are hundreds of cries for help, the noise of dragging the house [呟呟呟呟呟呟呟呟呟呟呟呟呟呟呟呟21599 ), grab the sound and splash water. Everything [everything: everything (in this case) should have (sound)] is everywhere. Although [although: although] people have hundreds of hands and fingers, they can't point to one end [can't point to one end: can't specify one of them (sound). All kinds of sounds that describe and imitate ventriloquism are issued at the same time and intertwined, making it impossible to recognize them one by one. One end, one end, here means "one kind". 〕; A man has a hundred mouths and a hundred tongues in his mouth. You can't name a place. So all the guests changed their colors, left the table and bravely showed their arms. Excited, relieved, relieved. ), two [stocks: thighs] are playing [fighting: trembling], and several [several (jρ): almost, almost] want to go first.
The ventriloquist imitates the scene of the fire, as well as the demeanor and movements of the guests.
This passage is the second climax of ventriloquism performance and the climax of the whole text.
The above three paragraphs are the main part of the article, describing the wonderful performance of the performers and the reaction of the audience. The combination of front description and side description organically links performance skills and performance effects, highlighting the "goodness" of ventriloquism performance.
Three "shouts" and five "hundreds of thousands" show the process from the fire in the house to the spread of the fire to the fire extinguishing; "Everything has everything" and two sets of the same sentence patterns "Although people have hundreds of hands ... they can't name a place" always describe the complexity and vividness of the sound of fire. The sound written on it suddenly became louder and more chaotic, showing the violent spread of the fire, the nervousness and panic of firefighters, and reappearing the emergency atmosphere of the fire. Explain that ventriloquism performance is like a fire scene.
Write the guest's reaction to the ventriloquism performance. Describe the behavior and movements of the guests to the fullest. The word "go first" describes the panic and escape of the guests.
Suddenly clap your hands and all kinds of sounds disappear. Remove the screen inside, a person, a table, a chair, a fan and a piece of wood.
Write down the scene at the end of the performance.
This paragraph echoes the first paragraph.
"One person ……" ends the article by repeating, taking care of the first paragraph, highlighting the simplicity of props again, and comparing the complexity and wonderful performance of ventriloquism, it shows that ventriloquists rely on superb ventriloquism, not foreign objects. If it is changed to "draw a ruler, the group will not ring", it is also a kind of care from beginning to end, but it only shows the end of the performance and does not play the role of reverberation.
This paper describes a wonderful ventriloquism performance, which shows the superb skills of Beijing ventriloquists. It can be read not only as a narrative text describing the scene, but also as an explanatory text imitating the characteristics of ventriloquism.
Hierarchical and orderly is a major feature of this article. In chronological order, this article can be divided into three parts.
The first part (the first paragraph) describes the preparations before the performance and the situation that the performance is about to start. "There are ventriloquists in Beijing", introducing ventriloquists. The Grand Banquet Guests explains the origin of ventriloquism performance: since it is a "grand banquet", there must be such a grand occasion. "In the northeast corner of the hall, set up an eight-foot barrier", pointing out the performance place, indicating that it is a temporary stage with little space. According to the characteristics of this performance, it is pointed out that ventriloquists are performing behind the scenes; The props are listed one by one to show that there is nothing else. The ventriloquist's performance mainly depends on his mouth. Finally, with "Draw a Ruler" and "The Man Who Dare Not Wow", when the performance is about to begin, it touches the quiet and tense atmosphere of the audience. Apart from the word "goodness", this part does not add any praise to ventriloquists, but is full of ventriloquists' superb skills, which makes readers expect a wonderful performance.
The second part (paragraphs 2 to 4) describes the wonderful performances of the performers and the responses of the audience. There are two main scenes in this performance: one is that a family of four wakes up in the middle of the night, and the other is that there is a fire near the family. It can be divided into three layers.
The first floor (the second paragraph) simulates a family waking up in the middle of the night. The performance begins with "hearing dogs barking in deep alleys", which can come from a distance undisturbed and make people feel the dead of night. In this way, the audience's attention naturally shifted from far and near to the barking place, wondering what would happen. Then take a family of four as an imaginary "stage" and turn the audience's attention from the outside to the inside. First, imitate the woman's "shock but not stretch", the woman woke up when she heard the dog barking, which opened the curtain that her family was awakened late at night. Then imitate her husband's "nonsense" and the picture will gradually become clear. And because of "lack of stretch" and "nonsense", children are "crying". At this time, the curtains were wide open, and many noises appeared one after another: the husband was awakened, the eldest son was awakened, and the silence of the night was broken. Such a life scene was very common in ordinary families at that time, from which we can see the careful design of ventriloquists.
On the second floor (the third paragraph), write that the family fell asleep again. First, imitate the husband's "voice", accompanied by the woman's clap, "gradually stop", giving people the feeling that time is slowly passing. Then, the sound of mice stealing food and the sound of "pouring down" mean that the night is getting deeper and the whole family is sleeping, while the cough of women warning mice in the dark serves as a foil, which intensifies the quiet atmosphere. This layer shows that the family has changed from waking to sleeping into a basically static state, paving the way for a fire to be simulated below.
The third floor (the fourth paragraph) simulates the thrilling scene of sudden catastrophic fire. I began to use a technique similar to "voice-over", and a person shouted "fire", which suddenly accelerated the pace. Then imitate the scene when this family of four encounters unexpected changes: "When the husband shouts, the woman also shouts. Two people cried together. " The atmosphere changes rapidly. Then, from indoor to outdoor, people's panic psychology was expressed by "100 people yelling, 100 children crying and 100 dogs barking", and the fierceness of the fire and the chaos at the scene of the fire were expressed by "100 people calling for help, married with children shouting, robbing and splashing water", which made the performance reach a climax. At this point, the audience has felt that they are in a sea of fire, and they all "change color and leave" and "want to go first".
The third part (the fifth paragraph) describes the scene at the end of the performance. Explain the performer's props again: "a table, a chair, a fan and a ruler." It shows that there are no props in the performance, and the excellent performance just now is really performed with "mouth". From the beginning of applying barriers to the end of eliminating barriers, the article echoes from beginning to end, and it is seamless.
Another feature of this paper is the combination of front description and side description to express the theme. This paper grasps the performers and audience in ventriloquism performance: on the one hand, it depicts the superb skills of the performers, which is a positive description; On the other hand, it describes the audience's demeanor and movements and shows the audience's reaction, which is profile description. In the three paragraphs describing the performance process, the performance is written first, and then the reaction is written, so that the performance and the effect are organically linked, and the audience's reaction is used as a foil to highlight the "good" performance of ventriloquism. In addition, the explanation of the ventriloquism performance scene and the preparation of props are extremely simple, indicating that ventriloquism does not depend on other utensils to make sounds, but only comes from a mouth, which highlights its skill in the mouth and also sets off the "goodness" of ventriloquism performance from the side. The combination of frontal description and profile description has better artistic effect than simple frontal description.
Concise and appropriate writing is also a major feature of this article. The events recorded in the full text are brilliant, but it only takes more than 300 words. The description of ventriloquism performance is particularly delicate, from static to dynamic, from dynamic to static, and then from static to dynamic. The sound of writing is from far and near, from inside to outside, from less to more, from weak to noisy, from slow to urgent, from simple to complex, not only orderly, rigorous and orderly, but also complex and changeable, with repeated climaxes and varied, which vividly embodies the "goodness" of ventriloquism performance. Write the sound proximity with "lack of extension" and "nonsense"; Write a loud voice with "crying" and "yelling", and write a small voice with "gradually beating and stopping" and "whispering"; There are many voices that say "100,000 people shout" and "100,000 children cry", but there are few voices that say "but smell"; After listing all kinds of sounds, the words "Qifa", "Necessary" and "Zuo Qi" are used to summarize, and the words "Zhong" and "You Jia" are also used to explain the simultaneous occurrence of all kinds of sounds. In order to explain the order of sounds, some words representing time are used, which are both accurate and changeable. For example, "later" is used between the audience seat and the performance, which means that the time is not long, and it also means waiting for a while. "As soon as possible" means a short period of time after receiving the last sound. "At that time" refers to the situation at that time. "Once" refers to the same time. "Sudden" and "sudden" both indicate the time when the accident happened suddenly, and "sudden" is even more sudden. The diversity of words shows that the author is good at choosing the most appropriate words to express the content accurately according to the characteristics of the things reflected and the needs of the article.
● About practice.
First, read the text carefully and draw sentences describing the sounds in the text according to the prompts.
The purpose of setting the topic is to make students familiar with the main parts of the text, experience the exquisiteness of the sound description in the text, and have a rich perceptual impression on the superb skills of their peers. We ask students to fill in sentences describing sounds according to the prompts, so that students can better understand the artistic conception of ventriloquists and really enter the "prescribed scene" designed by ventriloquists, so filling in the blanks is a means, not an end. Attention should be paid to guiding students to carefully understand the scenes of various voice expressions, adding some details reasonably and cultivating students' imagination. Ask the students to recite the full text on the basis of completing this question and being familiar with the first and second paragraphs.
1. Show the process of a family of four from sleeping to waking and from waking to falling asleep in the middle of the night.
(1) From far and near, from outside to inside, from small to large, from point to near.
I heard the dog barking in the deep alley ... all the beautiful things are ready.
(2) from big to small, from dense to sparse, slightly heard the sound of jade.
The husband started coughing ... This woman coughed in her dream.
2. The performance of adding fuel to the fire.
(1) is noisy, from less to more.
Suddenly, a man shouted "fire" ... hundreds of dogs barked.
(2) all work together, everything.
The sound of the collapse of the middle power ... is everywhere.
Second, experience the writing skills of the text and answer the following questions.
1. Find out the sentences that describe the audience's reaction in the text and tell the function of these descriptions.
2. Simple props are explained twice before and after the article. How does this affect the structure of the article and the artist's performance?
The purpose of setting the topic is to let students understand the role of contour description. Instruct students not to talk about personal data in isolation when answering questions. For example, when writing a performance, in addition to the performers and the content of the performance, it is often natural to write the reaction of the people who appreciate the performance, and the latter is to describe it in profile. Another example is the coordination of the beginning and the end, which not only maintains the integrity of the structure, but also has the function of side contrast and emphasis on intention. Introduction and description is a common skill, which should be understood, but the key is to use it consciously and properly.
The sentence describing the audience's reaction is: "All the guests in the room craned their necks, looked sideways and sighed silently, feeling wonderful." "The guest is not feeling well, just sit a little." "The guests have changed their colors and left, struggling to get out of their arms. There are two wars, and they want to fight first. " This writing method highlights the performance effect and superb skills from the side.
At the beginning, "a table, a chair, a fan, a ruler", the props are extremely simple, intended to set off and contrast the complex sounds of the performances behind. The props at the end are reproduced to confirm and emphasize that all the sounds just now came from one mouth, thus highlighting the superb skills of the performers and also serving as a foil. Structurally, it echoes from beginning to end, making the article seamless.
Identify the following words indicating time and fill in the lines respectively.
There are many words expressing time in classical Chinese, which need to be sorted out at a certain stage in order to master their usage effectively and gain a solid memory. This question is actually a way to arrange for students, and other ways can be used.
After a while, it was a moment, and then suddenly.
1. means suddenly: suddenly.
At the same time: once.
It means one thing after another: right away.
It happened in a certain time: it was timely.
It happened in a short time: after a while.
4. Explain the underlined words in the following sentences.
The underlined words in these sentences can be roughly divided into two categories: one is different in ancient and modern meanings, such as "hui" (just catching up, just happening, just happening), "Dan" (only), "smell" (listening), "less" (omitted), "although" and "running"; Second, ancient and modern usage is different, such as "banquet" (holding a banquet), "milk" (feeding) and "name" (speaking), all of which are verbs in the text and are now nouns. Students should be reminded of these easily misunderstood words.
1. Guest banquet
Yes, just right, just right. Banquet: Hold a banquet.
2. But smell the barrier and stroke the ruler.
But: only, only. Smell: Listen.
3. Women caress their children's milk
Milk: feeding.
4. The guest is not feeling well
Slightly: slightly.
People have hundreds of mouths and tongues, so you can't call them all out.
Name: say it.
6. I want to go first
Go: Run.
Δ This article and Farewell, which we have studied, have wonderful acoustic descriptions. Try to find out the relevant sentences in the two articles and try to write a paragraph describing the sound.
● Discussion on Teaching and Learning
First, guide students to ponder the language, experience the vivid description of the superb skills of ventriloquists in the text, and pay attention to the clear narrative method and the expression method of combining front description with side description.
Second, recite the text to clarify the context of the article, pay attention to the structural characteristics of the first and last paragraphs, as well as the content, order and level of the middle three paragraphs. We should grasp the difficulties and focus on memorizing the middle three paragraphs. Note: 1. There are two narrative clues-the artist's imitation voice and the audience's reaction; 2. Words like "later", "later", "when", "later" and "suddenly" have the following functions and can be used as clues for memorizing words. Let the students retell the text first, and then recite it.
Third, be good at stimulating students' imagination. The key to stimulate students' imagination is to grasp the artistic conception of ventriloquism and put forward some specific questions for students to think about. For example, you can ask students: Why does ventriloquism start with "barking dogs"? What are the characteristics of "dog barking" in Deep Lane? What kind of auditory effect does "remote smell" show? What does it have to do with the next sentence, "Women are stunned and under-stretched"? The purpose of asking such questions is to introduce students into the "prescribed scene" of ventriloquism performance and let them have a deep understanding of the content and taste of the article.
● Relevant materials are available.
I. Translation
There is a man in Beijing who is good at performing ventriloquism. One day, there happened to be a big banquet for guests, and an eight-foot wide curtain was hung in the northeast corner of the living room. The ventriloquist sat in the curtain with only a table, a chair, a fan and a piece of wood. The guests sat around together. After a while, I heard a clapping sound from the curtain, and the whole audience was quiet. No one dares to speak loudly.
I only heard dogs barking in a deep alley in the distance. A woman was awakened, yawning and stretching, and her husband was talking in his sleep. After a while, the child woke up and burst into tears. The husband is awake, too. The woman patted the child and fed him. The child is still crying with nipples in his mouth. The woman patted the child and hummed him to sleep. Another big boy woke up and chattered. At this time, the woman patted the child's voice with her hand, hummed in her mouth, the child cried with a nipple, the voice of an older child just woke up, and the husband shouted at the voice of an older child. All this sounded at the same time, and all kinds of voices were vividly interpreted. All the guests cocked their heads and listened intently without craning their necks, smiling and secretly admiring, thinking it was wonderful!
Before long, the husband's snoring began, and the voice of the woman patting the child gradually stopped for a while. I vaguely heard the sound of a mouse, the knocking of pots and pans, and the cough of a woman in my dream. Hearing this, the guests relaxed a little and sat up straight.
Suddenly a man shouted, "Fire!" The husband stood up and shouted, the wife stood up and shouted, and the two children began to cry together. When braking, hundreds of people were shouting, hundreds of children were crying and hundreds of dogs were barking. With the sound of the collapse of the middle house, the crackling sound of the fire burning, the whistling wind, thousands of voices sounded together; It is also mixed with the cries of hundreds of people for help, the shouts made by firefighters when they pushed down the burning house, the sound of grabbing things in the fire, and the sound of splashing water. There is no sound that should be there. Even if a person has hundreds of hands and hundreds of fingers on one hand, he can't clearly point out which kind of sound; Even if a person has hundreds of mouths and a mouth has hundreds of tongues, he can't tell one of them apart. In this case, all the guests changed their faces without fear, left their seats, raised their sleeves, exposed their arms, and their legs trembled, almost wanting to rush to escape.
Suddenly, when I woke up, all kinds of sounds disappeared. When the curtain was opened, there was still only one person, a table, a chair, a fan and a piece of wood.
Two. Brief introduction of the author
Lin Sihuan, a native of Jinjiang, Fujian, was born and died in an unknown year, and lived around the end of Shunzhi in the Qing Dynasty. Shunzhi Jinshi was pardoned for his defense and died in Wulin.
Thirdly, about the scene description of this article.
The article "Kouji" is very vivid, vivid and delicate in scene description, especially in the description of lively scenes.
First of all, if you want to write a good scene, especially a lively scene, you must first have a comprehensive bird's eye view.
The first part (the first paragraph) of the article Stomatology is about the preparation before the performance and the situation of the whole audience. There is a bird's-eye view of the scene at the beginning of this passage. At the beginning of the article, there is a sentence "There are people who are good at ventriloquism in Beijing". When I put pen to paper, I always write a note, pointing out the place ("Beijing") and people ("people who are good at ventriloquism"). Then point out the occasion of the performance of "Grand Banquet Guests". The author wrote a little here, without laying out the details, but on the whole, he wrote the overall atmosphere and scene of the audience. The author vividly showed us a vivid picture of life.
Secondly, in addition to a comprehensive bird's eye description, the author also took a typical close-up.
For example, the scene of "building an eight-foot barrier in the northeast corner of the hall" after the description of "Banquet Guests" ... no one dares to wow "was written. So far, the author has adopted the method of meticulous painting, combining typical occasions ("an eight-foot barrier is erected in the northeast corner of the hall"), characters ("ventriloquists sit in the barrier" and "guests sit in groups"), props ("a table, a chair, a fan and a ruler") and performance effects ("nothing later ..."
In short, the overall atmosphere is written with a bird's eye view of the whole audience; The close-up shows the characters, props and ventriloquism effects concretely and truly. In scene description, bird's-eye view and close-up are often combined and used alternately. It can't give up this and that, and it can't give up that.
Furthermore, the description of scenes, especially lively scenes, in the article Kouji is not only orderly and rigorous, but also complex and changeable.
For example, the second part (the second, third and fourth paragraphs) is about the wonderful performance of the performers and the reaction of the audience. This passage is written in an orderly and rigorous way, such as:
The order of performance: write the situation before the performance first; Write about performers' performances; Don't write after the performance, the actors and props are reprinted.
The process of performance: a beginning, a development, a climax and an end.
Description of the scene: ① the site where the barrier is set; (2) There is a scene of a family of four moving indoors during the performance, and there is a noisy scene when the fire is put out; ③ The reappearance of the scene after the performance.
The description of ventriloquism itself: as far as voice is concerned, it is from far and near, from outside to inside, from things and people, from small to big, from little to many, from faint and noisy, from slow and urgent, from simple and complicated, from one family to neighbors. All the voices came out together, one after another, until all the voices came. When it was inexplicable, it was really overwhelming and amazing!
Write the audience's reaction: after the beginning of "Fu Chi", it was a quiet field, "the whole field was silent, and no one dared to wow"; In the performance, when writing about the activities of a family of four, it begins with "All the guests are full of necks, ……", followed by the words "The guests are uncomfortable and just sit down". In the scene of fire fighting, it is written that "All the guests change color and leave, and …… want to be first"; After the final performance, "off-screen viewing" is still a simple prop.
As you can imagine, the guests were amazed.
Author's praise: From "all good things are ready" to "everything that should be … can't be named in one place". After writing its exquisite performance and the audience's reaction, the author's praise is added to enhance the artistic effect of the work.
All the above are written at the beginning and the end, with clear eyes, orderly levels and strict order. At the same time, according to the needs of performing ventriloquism, the author describes a well-written, rigorous and orderly scene in a complicated and changeable way from the audience's point of view, according to the sequence of performances, interspersed with other aspects, taking into account alternately, and integrating casting and weaving. Such as the second part:
The second paragraph wrote the voice of a family of four, which is "all at once" and "all good things are ready", forming the first climax of the article. However, with a change of pen, the author turned his attention to the audience and led to the words of "craning his neck, staring sideways, smiling and sighing silently", which vividly portrayed the audience who were absorbed, amazed and intoxicated.
In the third paragraph, the family went back to sleep, and it was quiet. There were mice, the noise of turning over pots and the cough in dreams, but they were moved and quiet, which set off the characteristics of quiet night. This is the aftermath of the previous climax, falling together and adding waves.
In the fourth paragraph, when writing a fierce fire fighting scene, the article suddenly rose, like a riot, breaking the quiet state, leading from the bedroom to the fire, organically linking the two scenes, forming the climax of the article. Describe a complex, ever-changing, thousand words, long-awaited, close call, dangerous, changeable and real scene vividly and vividly!
The complexity and ups and downs of this writing make the article full of waves and swaying.
Also, we should not only describe the life picture centered on the activities of characters, but also reflect the colorful struggle life. The former describes the life picture centered on the activities of a family of four in the bedroom; The latter, in turn, reflects the fighting life at the fire-fighting site, thus showing complex and changeable stories and depicting the voices, voices and modality of many characters.
As for the end of the article, it echoes the beginning, ups and downs. After the performance, the scene reappeared, and the words came to an abrupt end, crisp and powerful. The reproduction of props emphasizes the simplicity of its performance tools, highlights its "mouth" skills and points out the significance of the topic. This vivid description, when you read it, sounds like it's almost the same. Why not let people be fascinated by it and cheer for it!
In short, the description of the scene should be selective and have a clear purpose. In literary and artistic works, scene description is used to express the typical environment of characters' activities, contrast the characters, render the atmosphere, promote the plot development and deepen the theme. The scene description in the article "Kouji" has played such a role.
(Li Zhiyong's "Mouth Scene Description, Text Analysis Collection, Junior High School Volume I, Guangdong Education Press 1990).
Fourthly, about the structure and language of this paper.
Stomatology is a good text, because one is simple and the other is storytelling ... The article also has many advantages in writing ... I will talk about my personal views on two advantages.
First of all, structurally, I want to divide it into four parts. (1) Keep orderly records. The full text is written in chronological order, from the application of obstacles to the elimination of obstacles, so that readers have the feeling of personal experience. Chronological narration is not a feature, but it is worthy of attention for beginners, because if it is handled well, for example, if it is arranged properly, it will be easy to be organized and follow suit. (2) There are waves in writing. Chronology, arranged in chronological order, cannot be as uniform as a pendulum. If you don't change, you will be lifeless and sleepy. One of the ways to preserve is that the content is important and urgent, that is, there are waves. Take music for example. What is recorded in "Kouji" is that the melody is getting tighter and louder. After the fire broke out, wave after wave of notes reached its peak, which was really overwhelming. "So all the guests changed their colors and left the table." The following is a way to write that the waves are getting lower and lower, but it also helps. It is a metaphor that safflower is set off with green leaves to make it look redder. (3) There is also the so-called escapement method, or the release method. ..... "Stomatology" also used this brushwork more or less. In the third paragraph, when the couple were asleep, they almost fell silent when they heard the voice of the mouse. "The guest is not feeling well", really lazy and a little impatient. This is music. Followed by "fire", the situation is big.