Hunan people’s marriage customs are based on the process: there are a complete set of rituals such as matchmaking, blind date, exchange of sex, marriage, marriage, worship,
making a wedding, and returning home. Most wedding customs are the same.
Matchmakers are indispensable: The status and role of matchmakers are as important in the past as they are now. Even if it is a free love relationship without the introduction of a matchmaker, as long as you get married in a rural home, this procedure cannot be reduced.
You are free to fall in love,
and you are ready to talk about marriage,
the elderly at home have to find a matchmaker to come to your door to propose marriage,
< p>Otherwise, if you do not comply with etiquette, you will be looked down upon by your neighbors. Then hold an engagement dinner and invite parents and important relatives of both parties to attend. Until the wedding, the matchmaker is involved from beginning to end, but there are a lot less things. If it is introduced through a matchmaker, then the status and role of the matchmaker will be very important.Mutual understanding,
communication,
resolution of conflicts, etc. between the two families can all be conveyed through the matchmaker.
The most important moment for a matchmaker is the dinner at the groom’s house the day before the wedding.
It is specially prepared for the matchmaker
The matchmaker takes the seat, and the groom’s family Important relatives all come to toast, and this meal is called "matchmaking." After the meal
someone has to accompany the matchmaker to play cards and so on. Because the matchmaker is not important on the wedding day, there is a saying that "when a daughter-in-law is married, the matchmaker is thrown across the river." (The man's family has to give the matchmaker a pig's head, a pair of shoes, a piece of meat, and 8 glutinous rice cakes. The rice cakes must be red)
Change Geng, decide Geng: The first step is for the matchmaker to send the man’s birth date to the woman, and the woman’s birth date
to the man. Some superstitious parents think that they are Those who are responsible for their children's marriage often ask a fortune teller to calculate after receiving the red invitation to see if the "birthdays and horoscopes" of both parties are consistent. If
they are not consistent, the marriage will be To reconsider. Fortunately, most modern people don't believe this anymore, so even exchanging red posts is often just a formality, and some even don't even need to exchange posts.
After "exchanging posts" and "combining horoscopes", the matchmaker must choose a good day to take the man to "ceremony" to get engaged.
"Giving gifts" is a big deal. Generally, the initiator of a marriage (whether male or female) must give a heavy gift to the other party.
The gift must include at least a pig knuckle.
p>
A pair of wine, one each for chicken and duck, and one set of clothing for each other's parents
A pair of shoes and socks, a package, and some things for the girl. How much money is in the envelope and some engagement gifts for the girl? (Mom said that when they were children, the man would give the woman
300
catties of pork, some glutinous rice cakes
cakes, and sugar.) Write in red letters when to go out and when to come in. .
“Grandma’s wedding gift is only a gift”: The selection of wedding gifts is quite strict and there are specific arrangements.
There must be
8
old girls. The cousins ??are mainly responsible for choosing dowries. There must be at least eight people, such as
If your cousin is young, you can also ask your good friends to pick the dowry, and carry the dowry all the way, which is very
very face-saving. After a closer look at why the cousins ??were asked to pick out the dowry, it turned out that it was the groom’s family who wanted to give red envelopes, and the wealth should not flow to outsiders! There are also parents, brothers, sisters, uncles, etc. to send off the bride. In the past, the mother did not
send off the bride. There was a suspicion of "just marrying the daughter, not the mother". Nowadays, the habit has changed, and the mother< /p>
You can send your parents off together, but father and mother are not allowed to sit in the same room, let alone the same seat, when dining. The grandparents will not participate in the wedding ceremony, and the grandmother is even less likely to do so. They are too far away. Until now, grandma is still synonymous with "ignorant". If you have something unclear, others will say, "How can you be like that grandma?" If you do this too much, others will say, "That's grandma's birthday party!"
You will cry when you get married: Phoenix brides go out in the middle of the night, at night
12
After that, call a respectable old man
My mother used embroidery thread to do her hair. There are twelve colors of embroidery thread. After dressing up, she sat at the door of the house.
Put a brazier at the door. , waiting for the auspicious moment. When the auspicious moment arrives, let the elders of the family carry them out without their feet touching the ground. The matchmaker holds a red umbrella on the side. When entering the groom's house, she carries the red umbrella on her back. . Also
On the day of the wedding, the incense table must be set up, whips (firecrackers), candles, money, paper (underworld money), incense (incense), oil
Sesame (sesame), beans and ginger are all indispensable. , fish (must be carp), meat, wine, fruit and other offerings are all available
Face the memorial tablets of your ancestors, kneel down and kowtow three times to bid farewell to your ancestors and from now on
p>In the future, she will no longer belong to this family, and will marry into another family.
This is the so-called
"water thrown by a married woman"
Immediately, I have to cry loudly to show filial piety and gratitude. Yes, if you are married far away and cannot go home for many years
to visit once, think about the sad moments and the family that gave birth to and raised her, and it is impossible not to cry
Yes. (My mother said that when my aunts get married, they start crying a few days before the wedding and cry for about a week. With the changes of the times, this custom has also changed. When my brother gets married, My sister-in-law cried for almost three hours
The content of her crying was usually about her unhappiness with her family since childhood, her reluctance to say goodbye, and what she was crying about. What, it doesn’t matter what you cry about. It’s your parents who are crying.
She is crying because she has to be obedient when she comes to her husband’s house.)
Gift money: Giving gifts is a difficult thing. First of all, you must determine your relationship with the person you are getting married or his family, and determine the gift money. You must also inquire about the level of the wedding banquet he or she is hosting at any time to determine the gift money. When everyone attending the wedding arrives
there is a special greeter who sets off firecrackers to greet them, shakes hands and gives up their seats, and serves tea and cigarettes. Shaokun, led him to the reception desk and wrote the gift book. The gift giver has to come up with cash and ask Mr. Gift Book to write his name and register the gift money.
How much was given away? There were many people around to see it! It’s better for city dwellers, one red envelope, one hundred and two hundred is up to you, no one knows if you give more or less! When you write the gift book, your host will give you a pack of cigarettes and a red envelope. If it's
Furong King, you'll have to pay at least 200 yuan. If it's Jinbaisha, you'll have to pay at least 100 yuan. If you don't give cigarettes,
you can get 50 yuan. The red envelope returned by the host is usually ten yuan. After finishing the meal, the host will give you a pack of melon seeds, peanuts and sugar, as well as a box of drinks. If it's a birthday party, switch to a box of longevity noodles. If you
don't have the money to give a gift at the moment, you can still pay the debt. You can write a gift book first, mark the debt, and pay it back within a year.
It's okay.
The chapel is the climax of the wedding.
When the sedan chair stops in front of the main hall and the bridesmaids invited by the groom stand in front of the sedan chair, the ceremony has begun. On the incense table, cigarettes are lingering, red candles are burning high, and relatives, friends, and staff are in their places.
The two best men appeared as "Yin Zan" and "Tong Zan" respectively, and started the praising ceremony
.
The bride and groom began to worship with the Yin Zan and Tong Zan.
The procedure of the worship ceremony is as follows:
Introduction of praise: the groom bows (invites the bride)
Introduction of praise: the bridegroom and bride take their seats (in front of the incense table) and play music Fire cannons
Tongzan: The bride and groom offer incense and candles (to the gods and ancestral tablets)
Tongzan: Kneel down and offer incense and candles. Light a candle, burn incense, offer incense, lie down, rise, and return to your normal position.
Tongzan: Kneel down, kowtow, kowtow again, kowtow three times, Xing.
Then, comes the traditional "Three Bows" - "One to heaven and earth, two to parents, and husband and wife to each other" and finally "Introduction to the bridal chamber"
The worship ceremony ends here.
When the bride comes in, an unmarried girl must fetch water and wash her face. The washbasin is a dowry from the bride’s family and contains a red envelope.
It contains red envelopes. If there is a son, the couple with a harmonious family will make the wedding bed
~~
The bride’s dowry quilt will contain a red envelope for the person making the bed. Before eating, the bride and groom must bow to all their elders, and the elders must give greeting gifts to the bride. We also have to worship our ancestors when we have dinner in the evening. During the wedding ceremony, you have to cook rice cakes
for the guests to eat, and give red rice cakes to the matchmaker.
Wedding banquets are usually held over two days. In the past, it was three days. On the first day, the "eldest daughter-in-law" eats first, and on the second day, the "male eldest relative" eats first. Before the wedding banquet ends, the matchmaker has already slipped away, which is called "escape". If he doesn't leave,
the "matchmaker" will wipe his face into the bottom of the pot. After the wedding banquet, the "sir" first went to the retreat room to rest for a while, eat some snacks, and be accompanied by the groom's elders to say some polite words, and waited for the attendants to clear the table.
After sweeping the floor, it was time for the eldest relative to stand up and say goodbye. When getting married, the groom's family will "distribute" clothing materials, shoes and socks, etc.
They also pay attention to red envelopes. "Sending off the bride" is another lively scene. All decent people in the groom's family are sent to the door, and cannons are fired to show respect. The groom and his parents should see the guests off at the entrance of the village.
When the man’s uncle comes, the uncles will start setting off firecrackers and firecrackers as they approach the man’s house.
After the man hears this, he will also start setting off firecrackers. How much firecrackers should the uncles set off? The man also has to put in as much.
The day before the traditional wedding, the groom’s family has been decorated with lanterns and decorations, and the layout is roughly as follows:
Main room:
A pair of couplets in front of the door, plus Horizontal batch.
A square lantern hangs high in the middle of the main room, and the four sides of the lantern are painted with
"Luan Feng
harmony
", " Patterns of "Avalokitesvara Sends a Son", "The Number One Scholar and the First Prize", and "Family Reunion".
A pair of huge red candles on the incense table. .
A picture of "Accompanying" is posted on the wall of "opposite" on both sides. .
On the last "golden wall" are the six characters "Heaven and Earth, Lord, Prince, Master" written directly from top to bottom. The way to write these six characters is very particular: the sky must be flat, that is, the two horizontal lines of the word "天" must be flat and not curved; the earth must be wide, that is,
"地" Write the character wider, not too narrow; if you don't open your mouth, that is, the character "jun" should be completely closed, leaving no gaps; if you don't close your eyes, you should write " dear" in traditional Chinese.
” character, the character “见
” on the right side cannot completely seal the last horizontal line of the character “目” above
; the teacher has no other meaning: the traditional Chinese character “师
The word "" should be written with one less stroke,
Written as "师".
New house:
Affix a pair of couplets on both sides of the door frame, add a horizontal inscription (the horizontal inscription usually reads "Luan Feng He Ming");
Affix a red double happiness on the door characters;
Hung lanterns in the middle of the new house;
Paper-cut red Double Happiness characters are pasted on the windows, and paper-cut butterfly patterns are pasted on the four corners;
Couplets are pasted on both sides of the windows;
Hung calligraphy and paintings around the walls.
Kitchen:
A pair of couplets at the front door, with horizontal inscriptions and a red word "happiness" on the door.
Others:
All room doors have a sign with the word "HI" on them.
The woman’s dowry: cotton shoes: before
50-60
pair
now
20- 30
pairs
Insoles: before
50-60
pairs
now
< p>20-30Pairs (My mother said that when she was a little girl, she would be asked to embroider insoles when there was a wedding event. At that time, she could embroider a lot in one night)
8
Bed quilts, cabinets, furniture, fire clips, tents (this tent was taken by the woman’s brother
before entering the man’s house When the time comes, he should give red envelopes to his brother-in-law, and a brother-in-law should give red envelopes to his younger brother.
If the younger brother is missing, he does not need to give it to his brother-in-law. For that mosquito net, the younger brother has to ask his brother-in-law to add as much as he wants
[
Of course within his
ability
]
)
Two barrels (not Worrying about drinking)
Bowls and chopsticks (meaning not worrying about eating)
Two boiling water bottles
(boil water for guests to drink on the wedding day)
p>
In backpacks (used for going to the market) and other things that women bring, grains and corn candies should be put into them.
Return to the home: Three days after the wedding, the bride will return to her natal home with the groom, which is also called "returning to the home". This
is an essential etiquette. On the day you return home, you should hide sugar, money, melon seeds, peanuts, and cigarettes in the new house
The more of these, the better. Someone from the bride’s family must come to pick her up before returning. When you arrive at the bride’s house, firecrackers will be fired< /p>
Xiang everyone went to the new house to look for things. Also,
the bride's family attaches great importance to
the third day's
return
, so the groom decides in advance You must be prepared mentally and in terms of gifts, and strive to leave a pleasant and good impression on your parents-in-law
.
Prepare all the gifts in advance and buy gifts that the bride’s elders like.
There are usually four gifts. The return trip usually starts at nine or ten o'clock in the morning. The bride and groom should attend the wedding and groom and dress up as diligently as they did
to maintain the beautiful and handsome image at the wedding.
When returning to their parents’ home, the groom and the bride must first greet the elderly. At this time, the groom should change his words and call his parents-in-law dad and mom just like the bride. The groom should call his parents-in-law dad and mom in a natural and friendly manner. He should also show cordiality, enthusiasm and courtesy to relatives, friends and neighbors
Etiquette means greeting people first and treating them with courtesy.
During the meal, the bride should accompany the groom and toast to her parents, relatives, friends and neighbors one by one to thank everyone for their blessings on their wedding. On the day of return, the newlyweds must stay one night at
her parents' home. When you return home the next day, you should take the initiative to invite the two elderly people and brothers and sisters to your home as guests. You can also invite relatives, friends, and neighbors.