1. Matchmaking
In ancient times, if you had a crush on a girl, you wouldn't go to the door to pursue it yourself, as in modern times, but you would find an experienced matchmaker to go to your aunt's house for matchmaking. If the girl also had a crush on you, she would say to her parents, "It's up to her parents to make decisions for life", while if the girl was not satisfied with the man, she would say to her parents, "I want to be filial to my parents for another two years".
2. Propose marriage
There is an old saying: "Marriage is the fate of parents and the words of a matchmaker". Therefore, before the couple get married, the man must first go to the woman's house to propose marriage. After a series of complicated calculations, birthdates, who exchanged children between the two sides, decided that both men and women were suitable for marriage, and they were suitable for each other. At this time, they could begin to propose marriage.
3. betrothal
After the man proposes to the woman's family, it is determined that both men and women are suitable for marriage, and then the two families can enter the betrothal stage. In the engagement process, the man should send a "book" to the woman's home, which is commonly known as "red and green book paper", while the woman needs to send a "reply" to the man for recognition, commonly known as "Wen Ding". At the time of betrothal, in addition to a written betrothal, the two sides also need to discuss marrying an auspicious day to win a good lottery for the new couple.
4. Three Books and Six Gifts
When both parties are satisfied, the man will start to prepare three books and six gifts, among which three books refer to: engagement letter (proof of betrothal, which will be given to the woman when Najib is in the six gifts), gift book (equivalent to the current bride price list) and welcome book (equivalent to the current marriage certificate, which proves that the girl has married the man).
Six gifts refer to accepting gifts (the man wants to give nearly 3 kinds of gifts to the woman), asking names (matching the eight characters of the age of men and women), Naji (sticking the age of men and women in front of the gods for instructions), accepting gifts (bride price and dowry), inviting dates (setting a wedding date) and welcoming relatives (receiving relatives).
5. Visiting the bride
When the sedan chair comes to her husband's house, the little girl who leaves the sedan chair needs to greet the bride when she leaves the sedan chair. Then he went to the main hall of the wedding and began the tedious ceremony of paying homage to the bride. The ceremony of paying homage to the church is divided into three parts, namely, paying homage to heaven and earth, parents and husband and wife. Moreover, these ceremonies require new people to kneel on the ground and kowtow seriously, instead of bowing face to face today.
6. Helang wine
In the evening of visiting the church, the man's home is a good day, and it is called "Helang wine". On the Helang wine, the bride must pour wine to the elders and guests one by one in turn. At this time, it should be noted that when the bride pours wine for everyone, the wine needs to be filled, but it must not be spilled.