In China, the traditional concept of seniority of the Han people has existed for a long time. With oneself as the center, there are four generations of elders and four generations of juniors, forming the structure of "great ancestor, great ancestor, ancestor, father, me, son, These are the nine levels of blood relationship among the "nine clans" of "grandson, great-grandson and great-great-grandson". If collateral blood relationships and marriage relationships are linked, a huge kinship system will be formed. Only a part of it is selected here to show its hierarchical relationship. The first level: grandfather, grandmother, maternal grandfather, maternal grandmother "the second generation"; the second level: father, mother, uncle, aunt, uncle, aunt, uncle, aunt, uncle, aunt, uncle, aunt, father-in-law, mother-in-law "the elder" "One generation"; The third level: "Self" brother, sister-in-law, sister, brother-in-law, sister, brother-in-law, cousin, cousin-in-law, cousin, cousin-in-law, brother-in-law, sister-in-law, brother-in-law "peers"; the fourth level : Son, daughter, nephew, nephew, nephew-in-law, nephew-in-law "one generation later"; fifth level: grandson, granddaughter, grandson, grand-niece, grand-nephew, grand-niece, granddaughter-in-law, grandson-in-law "two generations later". Relative titles are based on seniority and are not limited by age. The elder brother is older than the younger brother, and the elder brother's children are several years older than the younger brother's children. After a few generations, the descendants of the main door are likely to be more likely to be of the same generation than the descendants of the lower door. The difference in age does not affect the seniority relationship. There is often a grandson with a beard or a grandpa in his arms. Therefore, the Han people often say that "the door is passed to the junior". Relative titles are also used in society between neighbors or strangers to express cordiality and respect. For example: people of the same age in the neighborhood often refer to each other as brothers, brothers, sisters, and sisters. Young people call their parents' peers as uncle, uncle, aunt, aunt, aunt, etc., and they call their grandparents' peers as grandpa and grandma. , grandma, master, etc. Generally speaking, it is very important to pay attention to the level and grasp the angle in the use of titles. Different age levels have different titles, especially the titles on the envelope. For example, when a son writes a letter to his father or mother, he should call him "parents" or "mom and dad" in the letter, but the title on the envelope is a matter of perspective. It is appropriate to call him Mr. Relative titles are also used in society between neighbors or strangers to express cordiality and respect. For example: People of the same age in the neighborhood often refer to each other as brothers, brothers, sisters, and sisters. Young people call their parents' peers as uncle, uncle, aunt, aunt, aunt, etc., and they call their grandparents' peers as grandpa and grandma. , grandma, master, etc. Generally speaking, it is very important to pay attention to the level and grasp the angle in the use of titles. Different age levels have different titles, especially the titles on the envelope. For example, when a son writes a letter to his father or mother, he should call him "parents" or "mom and dad" in the letter, but the title on the envelope is a matter of perspective. It is appropriate to call him Mr. In life, in order to show respect for people, there are also special phenomena of not paying attention to levels. For example: There is a respected elder in a certain family, and the younger people in the family call him grandpa, grandma, master, grandma, etc. Neighbors, regardless of gender, old and young, may all call him grandpa, grandma, master, grandma, but the title of the former Often named. Such as Grandma Liu in "Dream of Red Mansions" and Fourth Master Liu in "Camel Xiangzi". Sometimes the word "he (she)" is added before the title, such as: his uncle, her second aunt, his grandma, her second brother Li, etc. Similar titles are still widely used today. I don’t know if seniority is a culture, but figuring out seniority is really a science. In China, the origin and history of seniority cannot be verified by me, who is not very talented and knowledgeable. However, the records in ancient books and my own experience from childhood to the present have allowed me to touch the river of subtle changes in seniority through the vicissitudes of time and the changes of dynasties. Seniority, for a person, is determined when he is born, and he has no choice. The seniority among members of the same clan is strictly observed. For example, the names must be accurate. In daily life, one must greet the elders, offer smoke, give up seats, and give way. The order of sitting is also very particular, and etiquette must not be messed up. A person's words, deeds, and even destiny will be affected by clan etiquette and bound by traditional morality. I have read historical data like this: In Shanxi, at the foot of Wutai Mountain, there is a large village of more than 4,000 people - Huaiyin Village. The surname Zhao accounts for more than 90%, and people in the village are called the Zhao family, with prosperous people and a prosperous family. According to "Huaiyin Village Chronicles": Huaiyin Village has been inhabited by humans since the Neolithic Age.
Beginning in the Hongwu Year of the Ming Dynasty, Boying Gong, the ancestor of the Zhao family, moved to Wutai from Mayi, Shuozhou, and settled in Huaiyin. He mainly engaged in farming, was diligent and thrifty, and gradually became a prominent family in Wutai. The Zhao family has been multiplying for more than 600 years and has been passed down for 25 generations. They started hard, treated others generously, passed on the family tree, and were strict in seniority. They also organized and planned a set of 12 books called "Zhao Family Genealogy". Seniority is strictly observed in the Zhao family. Even the old man with white hair must call the children who are older than him as grandpa or uncle. If someone calls someone by the wrong name, they will be immediately criticized and corrected by the tribesmen. The naming of children in the clan is also based on the seniority in the genealogy and should not be chosen arbitrarily. It can be seen that the people of Huaiyin Village have lived in such a relatively closed or semi-closed environment for hundreds of years, and have gradually formed and settled a relatively independent culture and etiquette system, which has influenced one generation after another. a generation. There is little population movement here, people live a stable life, and their lives are relatively poor and backward. The self-sufficient natural economy inevitably requires the unity and cooperation of the same clan and family, helping each other, and the ties between clans are relatively close, which is closely related to the development of social economy and opening up. The degree is also closely related. Traces of "seniority" can also be found in the masterpiece "A Dream of Red Mansions" that we are familiar with. For example, in the chapter [Lin Daiyu enters Jia's house]: Daiyu "pays attention every step of the way, cares all the time, and refuses to say another word or walk an extra step for fear of being laughed at." She first visited her grandmother, and when Wang Xifeng came, , Jia Mu jokingly called her "Feng Lazi". Daiyu didn't know how to address her and didn't dare to make a mistake. When the sisters said, "This is Sister-in-law Lian," she hurriedly apologized and called her "Sister-in-law." It can be seen that in feudal society, seniority was also very important. Without knowing seniority and identity, one was very cautious when addressing a person. When greeting guests or having meals, they are also very particular about the seating order and position. For example, when eating, guests should be politely seated. If the guests are young and senior, they should refuse to sit on the side or below, otherwise they will be seated. You will be looked down upon and scorned by others. When Daiyu went to visit her second uncle Jia Zheng, Lao Maomo asked her to sit on the kang. Daiyu, considering her position, did not sit on the kang, but sat on a chair to the east. When meeting her aunt Mrs. Wang, Mrs. Wang was sitting on the lower head in the west. When she saw Daiyu, she moved to the east. Daiyu guessed that this was Jia Zheng's seat and refused repeatedly. "Mrs. Wang took her to the Kang again and again. She helped Mrs. Wang sit down." When Mrs. Jia was passing the meal, Jia's mother was sitting alone on the couch in front of her. There were four empty chairs on both sides. Xifeng pulled Daiyu to sit on the first chair on the left. Daiyu gave in very much. , Jia Mu explained, "Your aunt and sisters-in-law are not eating here. You are a guest, so you should sit like this." Dai Yufang said her seat and sat down. Since there are many people in Jia's family, with different identities and complicated seniority, Daiyu has to be careful every step of the way and pay attention all the time, so as not to make mistakes, make jokes, and mess up the etiquette. The records in historical materials and many performances in classical books seem to be very far away from us. However, my unforgettable experience brought me into close contact with my seniority. My parents are from Shandong, and they both went to support the frontier at a young age. I was born in that distant and beautiful Xinjiang. When I was 16 years old, my mother took me back to my hometown to visit relatives. My grandpa lived in a remote place, and cars were hard to come by, so I followed my mother for a long walk. At noon, the old man said: Come on, put it on the table! The men around him hesitated for a moment, gave in to each other, and then sat down. But my mother quietly signaled me not to sit down: It turns out that women are not allowed to sit at the table here! If you don't understand the rules, you can't sit around. It's definitely a status symbol here. If you sit around, you will get cold looks from everyone. Finally, I sat down at the old man's signal...