Before the engagement, the matchmaker will talk to the parents of both parties, and then the man will send firecrackers to the woman’s house as a preliminary engagement. Those who do not send firecrackers can also send Geng Tie first (commonly known as: Fa BaZi. The so-called Fa BaZi is The year, month, day, hour, and day stems and branches of the birth date of both men and women). Some people first ask a fortune teller to see if the "horoscopes" of both men and women are compatible before making an order.
Go shopping for clothes a few days before the engagement (men from the inside out, ties, trouser belts, socks, shoes; women also from the inside out, if your husband’s family is generous, buy a few more sets, outside You cannot wear a complete set, if you have one set, you must wear a half set (scarf, trouser belt, socks, shoes). Buy gold jewelry. On the day of the engagement, I took the clothes bought by the girl (stuffed with money, it doesn’t matter how much, the men’s clothes will be stuffed with money at the girl’s house) and fish and meat, and went with the matchmaker to the girl’s house to pick up the girl’s family... ··
Nowadays, many rural areas still retain the custom of engagement. Engagement means the affirmation of marriage by both men and women. There is an old saying in rural areas that "the winds vary ten miles apart, and the customs vary within a hundred miles." This shows that the customs in rural areas vary greatly.
Let me introduce it based on our local area. I am from the rural area of ??Xiangfen in southern Shanxi. To be honest, there are quite a lot of folk customs here, and they are very different.
1. On the day of engagement, in our rural areas, the man must give ten things to the woman, which means "perfect". The woman's "return gift" to the man should include ten packets of wheat bran mixed with salt, and these ten packets of bran and salt should be sprinkled on the heads of future parents-in-law and sisters-in-law respectively, indicating that everyone is blessed (bran), There is fate (salt). But few people do this now.
2. In other rural areas further away, the woman has to go to the groom’s house accompanied by relatives on the day of engagement. When returning, the groom's family will not only give the girl a certain amount of money, but also give her a bundle of cotton, which is called "sticking cotton" or "sticking flower", which means that the relationship will continue from now on.
For example: I have a friend who lives in a rural area in Wenxi County. I heard from him that in their rural area, the betrothal gifts given by men to women include all kinds of clothing, gold and silver jewelry, wine, meat and candies. There are also many flower buns. In addition to clothes, shoes and hats, the woman's return gift also includes dozens of steamed buns. Both men and women cut the steamed buns into thin slices and distribute them to relatives, friends and neighbors, which is called "Sanxi steamed buns".
3. With the development of the times, these ancient customs that have been continued have now disappeared in many rural areas. Only some old people in the village know and understand them, and young people almost don’t know anything about them. Nowadays, many rural engagements pursue simplicity. The simpler, the better.