Lao Jia died on his way to work and was taken to the hospital by an ambulance. Even if you die, you have to go to the hospital for further examination. The doctor issued a death certificate, and then the body was sent to the freezer by the traffic police brigade. After the traffic police brigade handled the accident, Lao Jia's daughter-in-law asked Lao Jia to take him home for a day and let him go from home. After all, that home is the place that his hometown has been trying to care for for thirty or forty years. Old Jia's elderly parents cried their eyes out, but after hearing his daughter-in-law's words, they quickly wiped their tears to stop him.
In rural areas, old people are forbidden to enter the village with cold coffins. Seriously ill patients are usually treated in hospitals. When the doctor sees that the patient is hopeless, he will inform his family members in advance, and they will move back to the village while the patient is still breathing. In this case, there is no need to worry about taking the body back to the village. In fact, our argument here is that we can't carry dead bodies outside our home. Some people will leave the body at the door or the gate, but they can't carry it to the house.
We people in our forties and fifties don't understand what this story is, and no one wants to ask. Everyone just plays by the rules. Lao Jia finally cremated the urn before his son brought it into the house, and then sent it from home to the cemetery on the mountain for burial.
The so-called "don't come home for a warm filial piety" is something that farmers are particularly cautious about. In rural areas, when someone dies in the family, the family will pay special attention to travel. Don't go to places where there are many new wives, don't get together to have children and look after them, and don't go to other people's homes to burn seven sevens before leaving, because people with filial piety are considered unlucky, and going to their homes may ruin their fortune.
These rural rules and regulations have been passed down from generation to generation, and farmers hold the attitude that they would rather believe them than trust them. In order to live a better life for the living, they continue to taboo these things.
This is Shangrao, Jiangxi. Take my home as an example: After my grandfather died in the first month of this year, my eldest grandson will put on mourning at the first time, and then the village leaders will lead him to pay homage from house to house. At the door, the leader will call people out, and then my eldest grandson will tell each other when my grandfather died and thank them for their care over the years. During this period, he is not allowed to enter the other party's home, which will be disrespectful or scolded by the other party. This is wearing hot mourning clothes and not coming to the door.
Cold coffins are people who died in a foreign country. People who died here in Shangrao, Jiangxi, have to stay at home for a few days. The specific number of parking days should be decided by family members. If people who die in other places are not allowed to enter the village, they usually stop at the entrance of the village and take a detour when they are buried. The old man said that if the coffin enters the village, it will bring bad luck and affect the traffic in the village.
First of all, this statement is a kind of "feudal superstition" for some friends, but it is actually a kind of "local custom" for me, a kind of people's awe of life and gods, and a profound understanding of "returning to basics".
1, "Don't come to my home in rural Gansu", this "filial piety" will last for three years, which impressed me the most. First, New Year pictures are not allowed to be posted every year during these three years. The second is this proverb.
So this situation is even more important for the children of the deceased. In my hometown, this person is "filial" and "obedient", so the children of immediate family members are not allowed to enter other people's homes or even relatives' homes, which is very important in ancient times.
Before our village, not only children were not allowed, but even grandchildren were not allowed. As for the great-grandson, there is nothing to do. My great-grandfather died when I was a freshman, so I don't have such a "constraint". The so-called "Pima Dai Xiao" is the first half sentence.
2, "cold coffin into the village to the end", which is more "unlucky" than the previous half sentence. It is said that people in this village did not die in their homes in the village. There are generally two reasons. First, they died outside the hospital. Second, he died unexpectedly outside. Especially for women, it is even more serious.
In our village, the old people resolutely put an end to this situation. These people who died outside should specially invite a teacher of Yin and Yang to see the sky, find some strong men in Lebanon before dawn tomorrow, and put the dead people in the coffins outside. This is the "cold coffin", and then they can't come in directly from the "right way" when they enter the village. They must come in from outside the village. This route is for Yin and Yang teachers to look ahead.
The so-called defeat in the end means that no matter whether the dead people in the village are buried or the phenomenon in the topic, don't go to see it, especially the children and young people. Family members resolutely put an end to going out to watch the fun. Usually the village doors are closed.
"don't come to the door with filial piety." In rural areas, if someone dies, the first thing to do is to put on mourning immediately, which is called "fervent filial piety". After the dutiful son puts on mourning clothes, he should inform the villagers. In the process of this notice, there are also many stresses.
For example, when you go to someone else's house, you can't just walk in. You need to shout outside, and then the dutiful son kowtows to inform them. It means "don't come to the door with a warm filial piety". In fact, to put it bluntly, this practice is to respect others.
In rural areas, after a person dies, there will be expressions of "hot coffin" and "cold coffin". "Hot coffin" refers to the guests who died in their hometown, and "cold coffin" refers to the guests who died in another country. There is no doubt that the "hot coffin" died in his hometown and will definitely be buried in his hometown, but the "cold coffin" can't enter the village directly, but can only be buried outside the village. If the "cold coffin" insists on entering the village, it will not only have no practical significance, but even affect the child's career.
In fact, up to now, there is no science at all, just superstition, and with the progress of changing customs, cremation gradually replaces burial, which is even more unreasonable.
Of course, "a hundred miles of different winds, a thousand miles of different customs", some places have such a saying, some places do not have such a saying.
Seeing this proverb reminds me of an incident that happened in our village a few years ago, which is the same as the question that "if you don't wear warm mourning clothes, you will be defeated in the end". In fact, I made it clear that the meaning of this sentence is not correct, because this sentence was also summed up according to a living habit at that time. Of course, it is only a custom now, so I will explain it with life examples.
There is a custom in the northern countryside that if someone dies, his children will kowtow to their neighbors in the village. Of course, these neighbors are all elders in the village, but it is well known that their children will wear filial piety after someone dies, but the point mentioned in the question is that they can't wear filial piety when kowtowing at home, because there is a custom in the countryside that if someone has just died, their children will kowtow to show filial piety.
First of all, let's all know what a "cold coffin" is. In fact, the cold coffin here refers to the coffin for the dead. Then there is a custom in the countryside that when the prepared coffin is ready to enter the village, it must be supported by its children at the entrance of the village. Then "supporting coffin" here means hot coffin. If no one helps the coffin, it means that the descendants of the deceased will be poorer in the future. In fact, this sentence is also based on feudal superstition, so we should set up a scientific point of view to learn this.
In short, this sentence is a view of the older generation on the culture at that time, but now people's living conditions are good and their horizons are broadened. Therefore, when we learn the previous proverbs, we must understand some incompatible cultural views in combination with the current cultural development, and we must also take the essence and discard the dross.
The countryside attaches great importance to white things, and often there are many stresses in doing white things in the village. These stresses are simply a funeral culture and a sense of ritual in mourning for the dead. In fact, the rural proverb "If you don't wear warm filial piety, the cold coffin will eventually fail" can't be simply called "Mi Xin". As a funeral culture in some areas, it is a rather particular thing. Of course, for our generation, many old customs in the past have been ignored, and people will not take it out on you because of these old customs.
Today I want to talk about this rural proverb, "If you don't wear warm filial piety, you will fail to walk away from the cold coffin in the village." How to understand it?
(1) "Don't come to the house for filial piety".
The so-called "no mourning" here refers to Dai Xiao, whose children and grandchildren are all dressed in mourning after the old man just died. There's a lot of stress here. At this time, you can't go to other people's homes to mourn, nor can you go to the shops in the village to buy things. After all, the old man at home has just died, and others will be more jealous of these things. "Don't come to the door in mourning" is an emotional respect for others.
Last year, my grandmother died in the twelfth lunar month, and I hurried home as quickly as possible. At that time, my grandmother didn't have the "first seven", and there were more exquisite things in the village. But as relatives of grandchildren, we need to go out for activities or something, and the elders who preside over the funeral in the village generally don't let us do it. But even if others do, they will repeatedly emphasize that they must take off their filial hats when they go to other people's homes.
Men in the village usually wear Dai Xiao hats and leggings to show filial piety. Therefore, when going to other people's homes for funerals, shopping or borrowing things from neighbors' homes, we should pay attention to at least taking off the filial piety hats. This kind of attention is a rural custom and a kind of attention to funeral culture.
(2) "Cold coffins enter the village and fail to the end".
The "cold coffin" here is about people who died in other places. It is best not to carry the coffin directly back to the village, which is taboo.
1. My little cousin had a car accident in Guangzhou a few years ago. When my family brought the child's body back to the village, I didn't see the coffin where the body was placed at the entrance of the village. I only saw my little cousin holding an urn at home, and later buried the urn containing his cremated body in the cemetery.
I didn't know why at first, because people in our village pay attention to falling leaves and like burial, and few people choose cremation. When I was a child, I learned that old people pay attention to "cold coffins entering the village, losing to the last" and have many taboos about people dying in other places. They are usually cremated in the place where they died, and then the ashes are buried in their hometown.
However, there is another way to deal with this matter.
When I was a child, my neighbor's uncle had an accident at a foreign construction site, and his parents insisted on carrying the body back to the village for burial. So when the neighbor's uncle's body was carried back to the village entrance that year, firecrackers were set off all the way and kicked twice. The old man said that this can avoid some taboos.
However, the phrase "I didn't wear warm filial piety to the door, but I went to the village with a cold coffin, and I couldn't go to the end" reflected that the older generation attached importance to some customs and taboos in funeral. For today's people, many young people don't know these stresses and know little about the old saying. I hope that through the above analysis, it will help you understand the funeral culture in rural areas.
(Text/Li Abing)
Recently, the sudden death of Taiwan Province artist Godfrey Tsao caused a lot of discussion. Just yesterday, his body was just sent back to his hometown of Taiwan Province Province from Zhejiang. Maybe Taiwan Province Province is not as particular about rural areas in mainland China. I think of a rural saying here, "If you don't come to the village with a warm filial piety, you will be defeated in a cold coffin". If they enjoy it, it is estimated that the body will return to the countryside in other forms.
We are very concerned about white affairs in rural areas. We can't say that all this attention is idle or idle. I think this is a comfort to the deceased and a respect for the living, especially if the deceased is not his own relative, many people will feel taboo. This is also normal. Today, let's talk about what it means to "wear warm filial piety without going to the door, and the cold coffin will lose in the end."
"don't come to the door with filial piety." In the past, when an elderly person died, it was necessary to wrap himself up in Dai Xiao, that is, to pull a few feet of white cloth to make a mourning dress for him. It was said that he had just died. Although it is not as complicated as before, you still need to wear small white flowers and the like. If a family member has just died, it is not good for the relatives of the deceased to visit other people's homes, and of course, others are not welcome to come to their own homes.
In fact, people walk like the lights go out and relatives walk around the streets. What's the impact? Some people feel a little unlucky. After all, it's not a happy event. They always have a little pimple in their hearts. It may also be that the deceased family members must be in a bad mood, and the sadness is beyond words. When they are together, it is inevitable that they will be depressed and feel that the language of comfort is too pale. It is better to "not come to the door". Our rule here is that within three years after the death of a loved one, we should stay at home for the New Year, and we can't go to other people's homes to pay New Year's greetings or accept visits from others.
The cold coffin was defeated in the village, that is to say, if people who died in other places were cremated locally, it would be even worse if the bodies could not be transported home in coffins. In short, it will be bad for their families and others. However, the artist who died suddenly after recording the program a few days ago was transported back to his hometown yesterday. The program group promised to send the coffin to the other party by special plane, but later, for various reasons, the coffin was transported back through the warehouse of the plane. In this way, it has also been vomited and condemned by fans.
I think that's what stars get. If ordinary people don't talk about the special plane, I'm afraid they can't get into the warehouse. Just in the first half of this year, one of our neighbors died in a car accident in a foreign country. The local funeral home requires that the body must be cremated locally and it is impossible to bring it back to the local area. What's the point? There is indeed a saying that "cold coffins don't enter the village", and people can't fight "rules", so people can't ask for it.
Hot filial piety does not come to the door, and the cold coffin is defeated in the village. This behavior is a custom that has been passed down from generation to generation in rural areas. It contains many meanings and etiquette, which fully shows the wisdom of China ancestors, his profound understanding of loyalty, filial piety and righteousness, and the concrete expression of traditional diplomatic etiquette. The following is an understanding of two common sayings:
First, people have just passed away, and filial sons must wear white clothes to be filial. When you go out to do business for nothing, you must take off your mourning clothes so as not to bring bad luck to others' homes (because the dead are unlucky). Because you appear in other people's homes in mourning clothes, you are afraid that others will suffer unpleasantness and bring trouble to your family. This is not only a respect for other people's families, but also a manifestation of self-discipline and courtesy. Even if the envoy went to a relative's house to report his filial piety, he should take off his mourning clothes and kowtow at home. This is not only an excuse for the dead, but also a respect for the living.
Second, in many places, there are still sayings and practices of never going home. The ancestors had many ideas. People who used to go out, you don't know how he died. He died of illness, hunger, sudden illness, or diseases in other places, or plagues. Especially the death of plague, he has a certain route of infection. It is irresponsible for the whole village to return to the village so rashly, and the consequences are unimaginable. I think our ancestors must be smarter than fools. Give full consideration to the truth of these people's existence and life in the world in advance. Diplomatic etiquette, loyalty and filial piety are highly representative of China's traditional culture and education.
Living in the countryside has always been a very serious matter for white people, and it is strictly handled according to local customs. First of all, please invite the drummer who blows the funeral, but also prepare for the funeral, pull the mourning hat, kneel on the shed, mourn, splash soup, sue the temple, break the old basin, offer road sacrifices, send the travelling expenses, make a round grave and so on. These ceremonies also show the children's grief for the deceased and the memory of the elderly!
To understand the meaning of this sentence, we must first understand what "heat" is. The so-called "fever" actually means that when a family member has just died, his children and grandchildren will wear white mourning clothes and then go to the neighbor's house to inform others to pay their respects. But people who wear mourning clothes are not allowed to come to other people's homes. They can only stand at the door and shout until others come out of the house to inform them that something has happened. This is the so-called ".
My grandmother is such a person. Every time I go home, I dare not wear white clothes, even shoes, or I will be nagged by the old man.
The above-mentioned "re-filial piety" refers to the fact that family members have just died, and some of them may adapt to the understanding that the "cold coffin" was carried out from the soil long after death. Actually, it's not like this. The "cold coffin" here means to die in a foreign land. If a person dies in a village, he will definitely go to that village. This is inevitable, but if a person dies in a foreign country and is carried back to the village, then his children will definitely be adversely affected. But for many people, there will be the idea of falling leaves and returning to their roots, so this is also where different people have different opinions.
The above is what I mean by the rural proverb: "If you don't wear warm mourning clothes, you will be defeated in the village with a cold coffin." "I don't know what you have in mind. Welcome to leave a message in the comment area for discussion!